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h/t DrVino

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  1. “Quick, call the cops they are open carrying.”

    “Open carriers should move tactically like this.”

    “Damn, I forgot to open carry today.”

    “Open carry would have stopped this.”

    “I’m glad I didn’t open carry, the bad guys always shoot the armed person first.”

    “”Am I being detained?”

  2. All I see is girls in bikini’s. What does this have to do with guns?
    Oh. Wait. It took me a few mins to look past the girls.

  3. “Gentlemen, in your next course evaluation, we will insert you into a hostile environment. Your concentration and attention to details will be evaluated to the fullest. You will be given 10 secs to make it to the waterline, and if you do not make it to the waterline, you will fail the program.”

    Only two of the bravest men made it to the waterline. The rest of the men never made it past the beach line.

  4. I don’t think Churchill had burka babes in mind when he said:

    We shall go on to the end . . . we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be. We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender!”

    But why not?

  5. From the people that brought you the world’s most famous weapons training videos… Magpul Dynamicsโ„ข The Art of the Dynamic Skinny Dipp! (Coming this winter to all dynamic retailers!)

  6. While many units train for the use cover or operations at night, all but the most elite teams of commandos are prepared for a fight while surrounded by distractions.

  7. Warning: you are entering a Fundamentalist tanning facility. Any male (including aquatic species) caught sneaking a peek will be force fed 7.62×39.Enter at your own risk.

  8. Following the assignment in Miami Beach, Officer Eugene Tackleberry found himself under the spell of the place and soon requested a permanent transfer.

    There hasn’t been another shark attack there since.

  9. Called “She’s Looking at You, Bro!,” the US Navy’s Special Warfare Training Command implements a new program geared to increase performance at their San Diego SEAL training facilities. Asked about her contribution to the program, bikini-clad motivator Susie Q. gave a demure smile and opined, “I’m just patriotic. No one raises the flag more often than me.”

  10. A well-regulated Seal Team being necessary for the security of a free beach, the right of the people to bare arms, and legs, shall not be infringed.

  11. “Shoot you bastards!! Shoot!! It’s Dianne Feinstein and Harry Reid having sex!! Shoot before she gets pregnant!!”

  12. Gweneth Paltrow’s bodyguards fend off Jabba the hut.

    Jabba later commented: “I wasn’t gonna eat it, I was just gonna taste it.”

  13. (ืž”ืง) (ืกืœื ื’ ื•ื•ืœื’ืจื™) ืžื” ืœื›ืœ ื”ืจื•ื—ื•ืช, ืžื” ืœืขื–ืื–ืœ, WTF (ื‘ื™ื˜ื•ื™ ืœื”ืคืชืขื” ืื• ื›ืขืก)

  14. “And here we have an image of the Navy Seals testing a new cloaking device which renders them completely invisible to enemy soldiers. However they have yet to figure out why this system does not work on women.”

  15. Hakim I must be dying! I think……I think I’m seeing the virgins. Abdul you idiot, this is Fort Lauderdale, there aren’t anymore virgins on any beach!

  16. “So then I say to the Sargeant, hey Sarge, why do we always gotta train in the stinkin’ desert? Why don’t we train somewhere with some scenery? And the Sarge gets this funny look on his face…”


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