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  1. Diane Feinstein’s first boyfriend breaks up with her saying “sleeping with this assault rifle would be more exciting than sex with you”. And now you know why she hates them.

  2. “This is my rifle, this is my gun…”

    “Oh it’s OK, Paw, I was jes’ admirin’ his gun. I mean his rifle.”

    [I have a picture of my grandfather in a getup just like that. God that hat is lame.]

  3. Whilst attempting to persuade some young ruffians to begin painting the fence, a fetching young lady in incomplete fencing attire happened by.
    Distraction ensued.

  4. To the camera holder:
    HE says-“Hell-they strangers on MY property with no invite from me.”
    SHE says-“Yep, n they got UUUGLY nekkid legs.”

  5. “…The way your dad looked at it, that rifle was your birthright. He’d be damned if anyone was gonna put their greasy hands on his girl’s birthright. So he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something…”

  6. Grampa’s unwavering inability to talk about any other subject made certain that only one particular kind of girl would ever be willing to listen to him long enough to become interested.

    That’s Gramma on the right, of course, playing naive. She would regularly mop the floor with him at 600 yards.


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