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Weekend Caption Contest

Give us your best shot. So to speak. The winner will get our sincere admiration and eternal Intertube fame.


  1. avatar Van says:

    Under the Taliban he and his conjoined twin would have been shunned. Here, finally, as part of the Afghan security force, was sweet vindication.

  2. avatar KW says:

    Hey Gallagher, check this out!

  3. avatar GDog says:

    Department of Agriculture SWAT team on the job.

  4. avatar James Felix says:

    Unfortunately for Mohammad the Afghan version of the William Tell story suffered from some significant losses in translation.

  5. avatar Andrew Wiggins says:

    “Hey Ahmed, remember that Hickok45 video?”

    1. avatar Vigilantis says:


  6. avatar james says:

    “Survivor Afghan” winner seen here with his sweet prize of a melon.

  7. avatar Scott says:

    Hostage drill anyone?

  8. avatar Bob H says:

    Pakistani Army Private Melik Asfanjani shown here with his prize for having the best maintained weapon in the Army for the 2nd consecutive year. Private Asfanjani credits the purchase of a new wife for the wonderful condition: “She carries it inside her dress all year to protect it from the elements, so it is ready for the annual competition”.

  9. avatar CUJO THE DOG OF WAR says:

    I found the locals to be very hospitable. As the photo above shows, I was offered the choice of two melons to shoot, and a complimentary AK 47.

  10. avatar Ralph says:

    It started out as a pimple on my earlobe.

    1. avatar New2this says:

      Said the melon.

  11. avatar Alex says:

    “What goiter?”

  12. avatar Alex says:

    “Me? I’m on my way to the range for our annual qualification. We have to bring our own targets though.”

  13. avatar Alex says:

    “The AK is our regular weapon. This is what we carry if we have to go non-lethal.”

  14. avatar Alex says:

    “Hey! Can anybody tell me where I can get a MOLLE pouch for this?”

  15. avatar Alex says:

    “We have to carry this around all day as a decoy head for protection against Taliban snipers. Works only on average half the time though.”

  16. avatar Alex says:

    I have one more about a lonely soldier but that might not be as appropriate here. Never mind – carry on… |:^}

  17. avatar G.R. Mead says:

    “OK, Nabibullah! Remember that William Tell thing the American GI told us about — You go first …”

  18. avatar Mogg says:

    This is my melon, this is my gun…

  19. avatar dave says:

    If you hit the melon you could still eat it

  20. avatar Terry4strokes says:

    I traded my camel for this stuff

  21. avatar Terry4strokes says:

    I got the melon in exchange for a broken, Jennings .22 as part of the Bagdad gun buy back program

  22. avatar RAN says:

    Sign a 4 year contract with the Afghan Army and we guarantee one melon a month.

  23. avatar Sam Wright says:

    I hope no one starts shooting, I might drop my melon.

  24. avatar Jay W. says:

    Anyone want to swap me another banana clip for my melon?

    (P.S. – I know its a magazine, not a clip, but it’s a joke and that’s the lingo.)

  25. avatar davvehall says:

    I know i got the good looks in the family,says the man with the AK,But my brother here,he got the brains!!!

  26. avatar Jason R. says:

    Seriously, dude! The William Tell trick will totally work this time. Trust me.

  27. avatar Aaron says:

    I buy melon to practice headshot… from traditional Pakistani distance of less than ten feet.

  28. avatar Brad_in_MA says:

    What? Gunny Lee Ermy’s coming to join me for a range session !!!!

  29. avatar Lance says:

    Thank you for shopping at Walmart.

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