Think about it. If you’re really going to be prepared, that means being ready for the S to HTF even on your day off, while you’re lounging by the pool or digging your toes into the sand at the beach. And a paracord bikini’s a much better way to achieve a state of ultimate readitude. A boringly conventional paracord bracelet will only give you about eight or ten feet of line. But if you cover what your momma gave you with a Paraphernalia Gear Parakini, you’ll be set for anything with about 60 feet of 550 fun. That’ll make a lot of rifle slings. Please remember, though, that unlike your heater, wearing a bikini is a privilege, not a right. [h/t]


  1. for my wife i’d need about 180 feet of para cord. i wonder how tough it would be to make a 550 speedo. nothing quite like a ofwg in a speedo.

  2. Dan, you’ve got too much time on your hands.

    Hemingway and Bradbury have written great books that you could be reading, it’s summer so perhaps a nice long bike ride would be refreshing, and surely you’ve dreamed of being able to cook like a five-star chef and you can if you take a cooking class…just some ideas 🙂

  3. I’m disappointed Dan, after seeing your booth babe photography prowess at SHOT, I expected you to get a photo with it in Use.


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