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Nothing good happens at 5:30 in the morning. Especially for those who have been awake all night, drinking and acting dumb. Such was the case when a machete-wielding armed robber stormed into a convenience store in Metairie, Louisiana. However, the would-be robber remained sober enough to become meek and mild when an armed customer drew down on him.

Cops say Robert Merritt threatened to kill the clerk before trying to steal some beer. More threats with the big blade led to a customer explaining things with the help of Messrs. Smith & Wesson. Merritt surrendered his machete and then promised to leave if the clerk returned the blade.

Amazingly, the clerk returned the blade and Merritt left. But the would be robber left his wallet behind, providing a big hint as to his true identity for investigating officers.

The Times-Picayune has the story.

A man who entered a Metairie convenience store armed with a machete and threatened an employee fled after he was confronted by a customer who was armed with a gun, according to authorities.

The blade-wielding suspect was later identified as Robert Merritt, 37, of Metairie. He was taken into custody after returning to the store while deputies were still investigating, a Jefferson Parish Sheriff’s Office arrest report said.

Merritt threatened to kill the employee, then walked inside and began taking beers, according to Rivarde. He’s accused of again threatening to kill the employee, who had walked inside the store.

That’s when an unidentified male customer who was also inside the store at the time pulled out his concealed gun and pointed it at Merritt, Rivarde said.

While Merritt was distracted, the employee grabbed the machete and called 911 for help. Merritt allegedly told the employee he’d leave if given back his machete, according to Rivarde. The employee handed back the blade, and Merritt fled the store, dropping his wallet.

He must have remembered where he forgot his wallet, because Mr. Merritt returned to the store while deputies were there investigating the original call.

Merritt then fought with the cops, resisting arrest. For that, cops ruined his buzz with their TASER before taking him into custody.

But wait! There’s more.

Because of overcrowding at the local jail, he back out on the street.

One of the deputies used a TASER stun gun, and Merritt was taken into custody. He was arrested and booked into the Jefferson Parish Correctional Center in Gretna with aggravated assault and resisting arrest.

Bond was set at $1,000, but Merritt was released the same day because of crowding at the jail.

Sometimes criminals should just save everyone a lot of time and trouble and just report to prison on their own.

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  1. This is one of those times I just shake my head. They let a man who hours ago was an armed robber, who made theats to kill innocent people out on bail for a thousand bucks…same day. Makes you wonder if society wouldn’t have been better of if the pistol packing citizen didn’t just cap him there.

    • Makes you wonder what crimes the people crowded in the jail are accused of. If they let out the man who threatened to kill someone with a machete then what evil lurks in those jail cells?

  2. Metarie? Damn. I figured the clerk would leveled a 12 gauge on his ass.

    Would be no bail for that.

    Kudos to the armed customer …… boo to the court system.

  3. “Bond was set at $1,000, but Merritt was released the same day because of crowding at the jail.”

    I’m assuming he also got back his machete. THEY wouldn’t want to interfere with his future shopping plans.

  4. When they allow ARMED ROBBERS out of jail the same day, that should be enough to wake up americans….
    When those same americans stand by while their country is overthrown right before their eyes, you know this transformation to communism is gonna BE EASY!


  5. The armed customer could have very well done everyone a huge favor and put a round right between the eyes of the Merritt. We all have to go sometime, Merritts time could have been being in a convience store at 5:30 AM drunk with a machete and threatening people.

  6. “Nothing good happens at 5:30 in the morning.”
    What? 5:30? Is that even still morning? Day’s half over. #dairylife

    • And that is why I will NEVER keep any kind of livestock. I like the rural life and appreciate the work farmers do (half my dad’s family are small-farmers), but man, if ever there was a life that ain’t for me…

    • Yup I start early myself. I’ve eaten breakfast and done several things by 0530

  7. The jail is not crowded until there are ten thugs trying to share the same mattress. Even then who gives a F*** . The SOB should rot in the cell. 🤣

  8. Noting good happens at 5:30 in the morning ? Lol
    I’m either at the gym , walking to my tree stand , or launching the boat .

    slacker ….

    • Ain’t that the truth. I see the craziest driving at that hour. Red light running, speeding, applying makeup at 60mph.

      • LOL – redlight running, you say? 1982/1983, we were in the Brooklyn Navy Shipyard. Government housing was way out in East Meadow. Three of us would ride to work in the morning, in about 15 minutes. We never stopped for a light, unless something was coming.

        The return rid in the evening was never as much fun, but we still did better than our shipmates in four-wheeled vehicles.

    • You people are nuts. If I’m ever awake at 5:30 am, it’s because I never slept — and that almost never happens.

    • Poor guy was just walking up to the cash register to pay for that machete that the store had for sale in the candy aisle.

      This event proves once and for all that concealed carriers are out-of-control cowboys jumping to conclusions and itching to pull the trigger for any reason or no reason at all.


      • I know huh! You have one beer, go to the store and some wanna-be hero, gun packing hick see’s your pocket knife and suddenly it’s all over. We need more gun laws! Hell, you can buy a gun easier than a book!
        (I heard that, it must be true)

  9. Should have kept the blade. Mount it on the wall with his picture and Dipshit of the Year under it.

  10. This is really, seriously, deeply wrong on three levels:

    1) Justice demands that the attacker stay in jail through his trial because HE JUST THREATENED TO MURDER SOMEONE!

    2) Public policy demands that the attacker stay in jail through his trial because releasing him tells the world that violent criminals can act with impunity and thereby encourages a significant increase in violent crime.

    3) Safety demands that the attacker stay in jail through his trial — instead he is free to go back to the store with a rock, brick, knife, pipe, tree limb, etc. and levy retribution on that store clerk that called the police on him.

    When our criminal justice system fails in such spectacular fashion, it is time for the good people of our nation to do what is necessary.

    • Reminds me of the triple homicide in Florida.
      Bad guy is 26 years old and has 230 felonies on his record.

      • Not accurate. He has 250 charges on his rap sheet, level of crime unspecified. He has fifteen convictions–but has only been to prison twice. Since you go to prison for felonies, jail for misdemeanors, and even assuming some great plea bargains (or juvie time) most of his charges were probably not felonies.

        I am NOT saying he is a good guy, only that he probably does not have 250 felony charges.

      • “Reminds me of the triple homicide in Florida.”

        Yeah, that’s local to me.

        When they set up a tip line to take anonymous leads, they got around 60 calls telling them they needed to check that thug out. They had no direct knowledge of the murders, but told the cops they needed to check him out, because it sounded like something that he would have done.

        Contrast that with the little 8 year-old Atlanta girl that got shot during the BLM riots.

        No one in that community stepped up to identify that killer.

        To give you an idea of just how evil that POS was, he was bonded out in March for breaking an old man’s arm with a compound fracture.

        That elderly guy and his wife were driving down a road not fast enough for that POS. He was riding right on his bumper. So the old folks slowed down even further. That POS was still tailgating the old folks.

        So the old folks finally pulled off the road entirely and stopped. The POS stopped right behind him and got out of his truck carrying a *fucking crowbar*. The POS walked up to the car and was screaming at the driver (the elderly wife) and hitting their car with that crowbar.

        Alarmed at what was happening to his wife, the old guy exited his passenger car door and yelled at him to stop harassing his wife.

        Here is the ugly part – Crowbar boy walked over with that crowbar still in his hand to hit him on the head. Reflexively, the old man put up his arm to block the blow. The crowbar crushed his arm giving the old man a compound fracture of that arm.

        That’s how pure evil that guy is. It’s too bad we can’t just execute that POS right now.

        With any luck, maybe someone in the state prison can take care of it for society. He needs to die, like as soon as possible…

        • I followed the news of this.

          Horrible and without remorse. They should have never made it to jail if you know what I mean.


        • He was so angry the old man was slowing him down on the road, he took the time to pull over and beat him up.

        • The wife was driving.

          If there were ever someone who needed to be put down like a dog that bites a kid, ‘TJ’ is it…

  11. This is the sort of stupidity that creates more crime. It’s not like he shoplifted a candy bar or a bag of potato chips. He threatened death to illegally obtain merchandise. The value of the attempted theft isn’t even important at that point. He threatened to kill, however incompetently, and had the means to carry out that threat.

    Released due to over crowding?

    Hey, if crowding is that bad pick some non-violent shop lifter held for taking a candy bar, and hold the nut with the big long sharp KILLING DEVICE!!!!

    • In this day and age, misdemeanors are all catch and release. Only those who have actually committed a violent act, e.g. attempted murder, murder, and such, get held. The rest get bail, and that includes all the burglars and car thieves, low level drug dealers and vandals.

  12. Someone please tell me patrol tasered him in or close to his nuts.

  13. thats one full proof way to get your ticket punched. Release and Not even an ankle bracelet, he is probably already three states away now.

  14. I’m not staying home because of the hoax virus. I’m staying home because of crap like this, and the state letting obviously violent nutjobs back onto the street.

  15. Liberals looking to frame gun owners. No blood dont pull gun. Let people die that’s the wish of libby politicians. Why defend people when libby District Attorneys set criminals free. Red flag brandishing is all they look for then they prosecute that instead of real criminals. Same time protesters can do whatever violence they like. It’s obvious that their trying to screw us.

    • Exactly, the overcrowding was caused by those protecting themselves or their property with a gun. Absolutely must keep those dangerous villains locked up!

  16. Is the perp a nutcase? Affirmative. Will the perp get drunk again? Affirmative. Will the perp figure out he needs a gun to go along with his machete? Affirmative. Will the perp attempt another armed robbery, etc? Affirmative.

  17. None of this matters. The only question that matters is, was he wearing a mask? Or was he putting a whole community of Karens at risk?

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