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Whether you’re following them on Instagram or Twitter, you need to follow the Babylon Bee. They crack me up every day with timely memes…though some contain a bit too much truth for comfort.

I simply couldn’t choose, so today’s Gun Meme of the Day includes all of the Babylon Bee “headlines” in response to Biden’s “anti-crime” speech that we covered here and here (and elsewhere).

 

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82 COMMENTS

  1. And to think leftists worried when Trump was the Commander In Chief.

    Will Biden lose the launch codes like Clinton did?

        • ACTIVE STABBER / MASS STABBING

          Three people are dead and ten are injured after a Somalian migrant (living in Würzburg since 2015) went on a stabbing attack in Germany.

          Five of those injured are severely injured and may not make it.

          Thankfully, at least he did to not use a gun, and because of that the media will ignore it.

    • No way they let him near the codes….otherwise he might launch on Cornpop and take out half of Scranton.

      • Good point! And I just saw a former 4-star explain why we still have to maintain massive air support to enable an army whose opponents have exactly none. As a Vietnam Forward Air Controller, let me just advise you all that allowing someone other than U.S. military to designate targets for U.S. air support is only minutes, perhaps seconds, removed from B-52s exterminating the country’s leader’s political opponents, and enforcing graft, corruption and kickback. EVERY time! And all that air support will also not protect our aircrews from being shot in the back or burned to death as in Libya. Don’t let them make us stupid. If we’re certain we will need to return if we leave them alone, start making plans now. Land on one side of the country after 6 months, kill everything you see until you reach the other side of the country, take off again and fly home. WHICH REMINDS ME! of a well known solution for Vietnam at the time; load all the people on ships, then nuke the country to glass all the way North to South, then sink the ships. Problem solved.

        • I’ve been preaching since day one, that we should never have declared war on Afghanistan. A punitive expedition was justified. Go in, get bin Laden, break a bunch of stuff while we’re there, the GTFO. The entire operation should have taken 12 months or less.

          The very idea of using an army for “nation building” is ludicrous.

    • T-38s are available, in the right places.

      That’s the civvie version of the F-5 from 50 years back…

      • Which was useless. And the T-38 is a trainer, and close to 60 years old. And more fun that most anything you’ve ever dreamed of. I remember it most fondly.

    • CDNN has 80% F-15s. When Senile, Sniffy Joey heard that he pooped his Depends. Just this afternoon, got my 80% F-15 finished and fired right up. Sucked two neighbor crumb crunchers into the intakes. Just like shooting chickens into intakes testing. Would have been sad, but they were Libturd Snowflakes in training. Current best use…….

      • I’m expecting 80percentarms to start selling 80% nukes, now that Joe Biden said that’s what Americans will need to stop a tyrannical government.
        I wonder if Cabellas sells 80% nukes?

  2. I wanted to get an F15, but all the streets in my neighborhood are tree-lined. No place to land. So, I guess I’ll have to settle for one of them whirley-rotor, vertical take-off and land gizmos. The neighbor across the street has a big front lawn.

    Go Maricopa!!!!!!

    • dacian’s unicorn is VSTOL, but it only has one hardpoint pylon to launch from, so max of two NATO spec missiles.

    • Noooo…it’s a very sexist machine, it has a phallic cyclic symbol that you hold in your hands to steer and another one at your side that you pull on for your “Collective” power…not to mention that they have one million moving parts…the failure of any one turns it into a homesick rock…Auto-rotation, by it’s very name, should be relegated to the vulgar magazines found under news counters.

      Look at the language of these whirley-thingies: dust-off, landing zone, hot insertion, egg-beaters, they make a sound described as “wop – wop – wop”, etc these gizmos flamboyantly epitomize really mean trigger words for just about every marginalized or self-identified group you can imagine (and a few that you can’t).

      They should be banned…for the children!

    • The Marine version of the F-35 is VTOL, like the Harrier was, and since it is Stealth, none of your neighbors would even notice, right? Well, no, but I ain’t paying a couple hundred million anyway.

  3. I went to Bass Pro a couple of hours ago and didn’t see a single nuke. Or a single round of pistol ammo. I don’t know which one bummed me out the most.

    Then again, the thought of Bumbling Biden having the nuclear football in his demented possession is probably the biggest bummer of all.

    • Don’t worry, Ralph 😉 about crazy uncle Joe he doesn’t have nuclear ☢️ football with him not the code.
      It’s with whoever is really running this country

        • I doubt it, I believe it begins with his wife.
          She stikes me that she really likes being First Lady and she has the key to medication cabinet, along with his family jewels.and code to the “football”
          The wife is often the running the show

  4. I want the 80% F-22 Raptor. My neighbor’s an A&P mechanic, I’m sure we can figure it out.

    • F-16 for the win, with an A-10 for ground support. Can’t beat that duo.

      Did you know “The Gun” was designed first, and the Warthog’s structure was designed around it to accommodate afterward?

      • …And after being developed around the gun, the turbines had to have their combustion sections modified ,since in operational inflight testing, the GAU 8 would snuff them out with it’s exhaust output.

        • Years ago, when I attended the Edwards Air Force Base’s 100th anniversary celebration, part of the demonstrations was an A-10 strafing a decommissioned tank. The Warthog seemed to be flying on Elven magic because it was able to maneuver at crazy angles while at slow speeds. But when it lined up on that tank and the pilot let loose, it sounded glorious, and the tank was obliterated more thoroughly than any of us in the crowd expected.

    • The problem with an A-10 is it’s limited capacity for depleted uranium projectiles of justice. Puff the Magic Dragon is far more impressive. That sucker carries TONS of ammo!

  5. In 1776, Great Britain was the big he-wolf in the world. They were the only super power standing at that point. Americans were a small group of British colonists who existed under the heel of the British Empire. They sent the dregs of their society to ‘the colonies’ to get rid of them at home. The America of those times was the most repressive at any time in our history, except for perhaps today in terms of gov’t behavior.

    At the time of the shot heard round the world, Lexington and Concord, armed American patriots were few and far between. At the height of the Revolution, only 1 in 6 of American colonists were actively engaged in resisting the British in any form. Those fighting under arms were even less. Today, under similar circumstances, there would be a much higher percentage of patriots who would step up, who have military training, and who own firearms.

    If it ever comes to a shooting war, all the planes, tanks, and missiles in the world aren’t going to help against hundreds of millions of guns in the hands of the public, tens of millions of former veterans who have combat training, etc. That isn’t even counting the millions of National Guard and active duty military personnel who will walk away before they fire on their fellow citizens. The gov’t is scared to death of such a scenario, and that’s why they are pushing so hard to disarm the public.

    • “…They sent the dregs of their society to ‘the colonies’ to get rid of them at home….”

      This is true and also how my family came to be here. Thieves, scoundrel’s, cutthroats, murderers, highwaymen, beggars, all of them. Absolute bottom of the bottom of Brit society…
      Makes one kinda proud..lol.

    • And then they dumped their dregs on the furthest of the four corners of the globe. A place eventually known as Australia.

      • “And then they dumped their dregs on the furthest of the four corners of the globe. A place eventually known as Australia.”

        And they have been doing *very* well recently, national-defense wise. Not in troop numbers, but in technology.

        They have some of the quietest diesel-electric submarines on the planet, that can stay submerged for many days if they need to, and even run their engines if necessary. A very clever trick known as Air Independent Propulsion (AIP) that they learned from the northern European nation. A giant Dewar’s flask filled with liquid oxygen.

        And they are among the best on the planet at electronic warfare. I image China isn’t very pleased with that… 🙂

      • Aussie girls can be quite serious sometimes..short story- We were in civilian clothes and driving our admin hummer to BIAP for something, I forget what, anyway there was a UN checkpoint on the route we took that day. There was an Australian squad there. We pull up and this very, very cute young lass with an incredible accent asks us for ID. (ours are tucked inside shirt on lanyards) We, being the male jerks we are, commence to giving the young girl a hard time. She was kitted with a Styer Aug. Someone remarked “Nice gun, do you wanna see mine ?” (sexual reference) Well, I will tell you that nice bull-pup started inching up from low ready, her face took on a “keep talking mf-ers”. Eyes were unblinking, that’s what I noticed. ID’s were produced quickly. I’m sure she realized we all outranked everyone there, but she was following the age old soldier Rhyme. “I will walk my post from flank to flank and will not take shit from any rank” I bet the Auzzies have a version too. Around 18 years ago I reckon..since then I’ve wanted a Aug, but too damn expensive.

        • Always liked the Aussies. I could tell you a story about a bunch of Aussie destroyer crew we hooked up with in Hong Kong once. 6 of them and 5 of us American navy types. We decided to hit the bars as a group and after awhile ran into some Brit garrison troops in a bar who were celebrating the Queen’s birthday. The Aussie pushed us Yanks outside, and said don’t go away, we’ll be right back. What ensued was similar to the bar fight scene in ‘Devil’s Brigade’ between the lumberjacks and the Army. Had a rippin’ good time after that.
          I should also note that most of the people sent to Australia were convicts from the Brit perspective. Of course, that included those who were in the debtor’s prisons simply for being poor. Most of those sent to the American colonies were indentured, which is another situation entirely. The original groups that established the thirteen colonies were either religious refugees (the Puritans, etc.) or affiliated with trading companies that had royal charters (like Pennsylvania). That was largely what comprised the Great Migration of the 1620s and 30s. It wasn’t until the the early 1700s that they started sending indentured and those from the debtor prisons. My family was part of that Great Migration in what became New England.

  6. The question to really ask here is how many Democrats in office fully support or would be perfectly fine with deploying nuclear weapons on United States soil to exterminate gun owners?

    • “…how many Democrats in office fully support or would be perfectly fine with deploying nuclear weapons on United States soil to exterminate gun owners?”

      Likely enough to actually do it. The higher in rank they get, the more Leftist they tend to be.

      And remember, the one thing a Leftist is, above all else, is Leftist Scum.

      Look how well they keep their troops in lock-step in the House and Senate…

    • I can think of one; Joe Biden. Especially if he can lure them all to one spot, preferably in one of the flyover states. So no Democrats will be harmed.

      • @LarryinTX

        I don’t see how nuking live Democrats actually matters…they will continue to vote “their conscience and Party” long after after they are atomized…and their heroic, mostly peaceful, sacrifice will further the U.N.’s goals for a sustainable world population. As far as Biden’s puppetmasters are concerned, it’s a two-fer win…perpetually assured votes and fewer mouths to feed.

  7. Bass Pro having anything 2 for 1?
    Cabelas maybe before they were bought by Bass Pro.
    Bass Pro doesn’t have enough pens for their employees.
    I had them order something for me.
    The order desk insisted on getting their pen back even though it was out of ink.
    They put it back with the other pens.
    They never called when my order came in.
    They wrote down a wrong digit in my phone number.
    I bet those nukes are cheap Russian Surplus.
    The Tula ammo of nukes, I’ll take a pass.
    I would rather buy a pre March 25, 2021 Winchester nuke for full price.

  8. Just as long as he doesn’t fire a nuke or two off into the air from the White House balcony, we should be fine.

  9. Which other demonrat communist made similar remarks, beto francis oroarke? These traitors openly say this stuff and their lap dog media say nothing.

  10. These are all amazing. With solid memes like this it’s no surprise that leftoids keep trying to kick the Babylon Bee off the internet.

    • “Gee does the Taliban have f16’s?”

      Aircraft, no.

      But they damns sure have seized a mountain of NATO weapons from our troops over the last 20 years or so.

      Crude, obsolete weapons, like ‘Hellfire’ missiles…

  11. after watching theBiden react to reporters and auto workers after asking him a question he does not like. I do not think theBiden needs tanks, planes or nuclear bonmbs.
    He’ single handedly would stomp the piss out of any insurrection.
    Dont make Grandpa angry, hes already Mad.

  12. I live in an apartment and there’s no room for a runway. Does anyone have a line on where I can pick up a F-35B> I’d even accept a lightly used AV-8B!

    • I liked the first two iterations of Duke Nukem back in the early 90’s…2D, glitchy and entertaining.

      I can envision a video game with Biden as Douche Nukem. The game series will highlight Joe’s many faux pas through his 48 years of feeding at the public trough all the way up to his current misadventures (allegedly, to be more user-friendly, he was replaced in 2020 with a Gen 2 SkyNet prototype android embedded with a set of limited responses activated through fuzzy logic programming).

  13. Democrat Party has come full circle back to it’s roots. Mob Rule. It’s not a political party it’s an organized crime syndicate.

  14. All the jokes and snide remarks aside, I get a real kick out of all the serious types who say we could never take down the government if they decided to go rogue and eliminate the 2nd Amendment.

    Back in the 80s the military was running surveys of active duty troops to find out if they would follow orders if told to fire on American civilians during an insurrection. The National Guard and the Marine Corps got heavy play on that one as I recall. What they found was that they couldn’t rely on troops to do that if ordered to do so. There was a bunch of organizational changes made as a result of those surveys. I don’t think things have changed much in that regard in the last 35-40 years.

    The other thing that’s funny is when they say the gov’t has tanks, and fighter jets, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, they do. So what? All those nasty beasties require infrastructure and supply lines to operate. Study some history about how what were essentially stone age tribesmen in Afghanistan kept the British Empire, the Soviet Union, and the United States tied up in knots for the last 250 years. Or how Vietnamese rice farmers and fisherman forced the most powerful military in the history of man to quit and go home. There are several million former military who are combat trained in this country. There are something like 400 million firearms in civilian hands. If push comes to shove, I doubt it would take more than about 30 days for citizen patriots to have the US military so tied up in knots, they’d likely be deserting in droves. Look at what a relative fews anarchists and black militants have done to the police, and they aren’t even really organized.

    If Biden wants to stay in power, he better hope to hell that he doesn’t piss off enough people to reach critical mass. He’s not that far from it right now.

  15. What Uncle Joe is telling us, the US Military will protect and defend this totalitarian government not the Constitution of The United States. There is no “united states”, there are free territories and National Front for organized crime territories, formerly known as The Democratic Party territories. They are confident enough now to take off the mask, if they win the mid-terms, they’ll take off the gloves.

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