To honor the start of the President’s second and final term—not to mention yesterday’s AWB unveiling—this week’s photo caption contest is an actual, you know, contest. With a prize and everything. The commenter contributing the funniest caption for the above photo will win a Drago Collapsible Backpack. The winner will be announced Monday morning. Probably.
Barack did not take kindly to the idea of the government coming to take his guns…
Kneel before Zod…
WHERE’S MY TELE-PROMPTER, MO-FO?!!!!!!!!!!!!!
“and you citizens thought i was only going to limit your magazines to 10 rounds” “still not using that healthcare though”.
Now hand it ALL over!
” there are white folks, then there are ignorant mother $?!@&$? like you”
BANG!
I like it! A quote from his book. Nice.
Freeze bit@h….or the Constitution gets it.
You can take the criminal out of Chicago, but you can’t take Chicago out of the criminal.
I like this answer!
“BREAK YO’SELF, AMERICA!”
Something something cold dead hands
Hilarious.
I SAID nobody needs military grade weapons…except me.
You didn’t think naming Biden as his Vice-Pres was his only anti-assassination insurance policy, did you?
“I will do everything in my power as president to advance these efforts.”
Direct quote in regards to gun control
President Obama, Dec 13th 2012
Say “what” again! Say “what” again. I dare you. I double-dare you, motherf***r. Say “what” one more goddamn time!
+1 for the win.
The tax man cometh
“Who said you could speak?”
He just took Executive Orders to a whole new level
That sadly has a large ring of truth to it.
“I’ve killed 200 kids with drone strikes, but now I finally get to do one of you little bastards up close.”
“I love cappin’ Christians and Jews!”
Obama taking aim at his favorite target, the U.S. Constitution.
Hahaha! You only had 10 rounds! Welcome to America, mother f*#ker!!
“now hand over your second amendment rights”
Commander in Chief Hypocrisy
Gimme all your money, or I’ll revoke your Bill of Rights. (with fingers crossed)
English mother f*cker, do you speak it?!?
Hahaha! You only had 10 rounds! Welcome to America, mother f—er!!
“Of course I have a gun, how else do you think I got elected? My morals? My job experience? My ability to speak without a teleprompter? Nope, just threatened to kill people and take their stuff”
Or
“Of course I kill people! How else do you think graveyards in Chicago got 100% voter turn out rates?”
“Vote or die bitch. The dead vote for me anyway”
“Yeah… I got ’em covered. You guys get their rights.”
You’ve just been Obamajacked!
Break yourself fool.
Is your username .9mm? I didn’t know they made .9mm guns.
What are you going to do? Impeach me?? Ha ha ha ha!!!
Obongo Unchained
Nice
“Allahu Akbar” – that’s all they ever say…
Chicago chamber of commerce: This fits us to a tee.
I hate Illinois Nazi’s
“Can you tell how many rounds are in this gun right now? I’ll help you count them out.”
“From my cold dead hands!”
Here are my first seven Executive Orders.
“Exempt? Why of course I am exempt! I’m the President!”
“Im taking Cheney’s advice and shooting first!”
hand over your weapons! its for the children!
“I’m Barrack Obama, hypocrite in chief, and i approve this message”
also “Hello, Wayne”
“Say hello to my little friend!”
Now UN are you going to ratify the ATT or do I have get gangster?
Barack poves that gun control is a very one sided issue.
Wait, what?! You guys actually thought I was serious about disarmament?!
By Executive order I have my own 1911 .
And there is NO WAY to have a Background check.
“Where is that GUY in Arizona that was shooting at Barack Obama targets, a few months ago ?”
Of course he’s holding a Glock. They’re all Glocks, aren’t they?
oh, that’s good. i had to read it three times, but it was worth it.
“Get back to your designated free speech zone!”
I like it.
“What do you mean, Rule Three?”
“Ironically, while Barack came to believe in the personal right to bear arms in self-defense, his previous years of hoplophobia made him forget to release the safety on his gun just when he needed it most.”
Obama to his golfing partner “I said that was a mulligan, do you disagree bitch?”
Say ‘what’ again. Say ‘what’ again, I dare you, I double dare you motherf@$ker, say what one more Goddamn time!
And then I was all like “pew pew!”
“What makes you think this my final term”?
Obama goes ghetto to find kids for his next press conference..
“Hey Wayne, how are we going to break it to DiFi that we are range buddies?”
“I may be way out of Chicago…but I still know the Chicago way!”
Bit@h I’m from Chicago, of course I’ll cap your azz.
Or
You think Cheney’s the only mutha ever shot someone in the face?
“Last one with a gun wins!! ha ha suckers!”
You Will Respect My Authoritah!
Or
“President Obama having successfully crushed the 2nd amendment is seen here in celebration shooting a banned semi-automatic pistol in the air. Exuberant White House Staff can be heard in the background yelling ‘Oh, shit everyone DUCK!’ Anti-gun congressmen later commented, ‘ooooh, that’s how they work? We had no idea! — Wow! they look like so much fun, to bad we banned them. Senator Fienstien was reported to be visibly angry because the President had promissed her that should the 2nd amendment be crushed, she would be the one to shoot the banned pistol into the sky over Washington D.C. and like so many other promisses, the President broke this one too.”
Now hand over the Constitution, and nobody gets hurt.
“You can dress him up in a tailored suit that cost $1332, but a thug still won’t hold his gun upright.”
“Here comes the change!”
maybe add: “…you’d better start hoping.”
“Rules, laws, always for the other fellow…”
Vote or die muthafvcka, muthafvcka vote or die
Rock the vote or else I’m gonna stick a knife through your eye
Democracy is founded on one simple rule
Get out there and vote or I will muthafvckin’ kill you
I like it when you vote b1tch (b1tch)
Shake them titties when you vote b1tch (b1tch)
I slam my jimmy through your mouth roof (mouth roof)
Now get yo’ big ass in the polling booth
I said vote, b1tch, Or I fvckin’ kill you
Vote or die muthafvcka, muthafvcka vote or die
You can’t run from my .38 go ahead and try
Let your opinion be heard, you gotta make a choice
’Cause after I slit your throat, you won’t have a fvckin’ voice
Vote or die
VOTE OR DIE!
-From South Park Season 8, Episode 8
Hand’em over… We’re better than this!!!
Gimme all your dollars and im keepin the change
or
This aint how you hold dis fool.
Hey Biden, side by side my ass!
you may hate me, but i’m still going out with a bang
“Back off, all of you. That backpack’s mine!”
LOL !!!!!!! The ban only applies to you peons !!!!!!!!!
Enforcing tyranny, 230 grains at a time.
Political power grows out of the barrel of a gun.
“Dianne was right… the Bill of Rights does make an excellent CCW qualification target!”
Pew Pew! Take that, Constitution!
obama unveils his new wealth Redistribution policy now “gimme your money you rich bastards “
Leave the gun. Take the cannoli….
“I`m sick of carrying guns and beating up women.”
Tax Please!
From the homepage of change.gov:
“The transition has ended and the new administration has begun.”
“See? I don’t *need* an assault weapon to kill you.”
“Disappointed with the GOP’s reception of his health care reforms, President Obama demonstrates his new plan to distribute bullets in an effort to encourage his opponents to give socialized medicine a try.”
Or…
“Moments before the press conference regarding gun control, President Obama could be heard saying, ‘Mine says Colt, point four five. Yours says ‘Replica’. It’s good to be the president!'”
Blat blat blat blat blat, 5 poppin 6 droppin muafuka!
Finally! The last gun in America!
After reading Saddam Hussein’s autobiography, President Obama realized there was a way he could compell congress to do what he wanted….
“Time for a reasonable discussion on gun violence”
“Time to talk. Player to player, pimp to pimp!”
“In other news, the corpse of gun designer John Moses Browning was found today fifteen miles from his grave site, investigators believe it to have spun all the way there under its own power…”
I do believe we have a winner!!!!!!
Me likey too….
“President Obama enjoys firing the first shot at the new White House gun range which he ordered built after his daughters reached dating age.”
Dammit Joe, I said dance!
Another good one.
“Badges?!? We don’t need no stinking badges!”
OK, front site, trigger control, breathe… Dammit Lapierre hold still!
Now where was I? OK, front site…
I am a gun owner.
I believe that spending has fixed the economy.
I believe in Obamacare.
I take credit for killing bin Laden.
Get a gun before the ban takes effect- I found one, figured why not.
#Thetruthaboutguns
“Got Gat? Not for long beeyatches!”
“I’M THE PRESIDENT AND I”LL GO OUT FOR A CIGARETTE WHENEVER I DAMN WELL WANT TO!!!”
Hands out of your pockets … so I can put mine in them!
What term limits?
So this is what everybody is whining about? Wait…..this IS awesome! Hey, hey Biden, check this out!
Hey Michelle! Look what David Gregory got me!
Wayne LaPierre, You dont look so bad here have another!
Oh look! A dog! Yum!
“Tyranny ain’t easy!”
—————
“Here’s shooting at you, kid!”
—————
Presidential Term 1 – “Hope and Change.”
Presidential Term 2 – “Hope for Change.”
No really, Michelle said Stalin used to hold it like this too!
“There can be only one!”
Joe! Dance you pasty fool, dance!
‘who’s yo’ daddy’?
Amazingly, Google Translate has Barry’s language Swahili !
so,
“ambaye ni baba yako”
OT:
if/when anyone’s up to it:
https://www.facebook.com/PragProgPage
“Sorry, I meant ‘Yes I Can'”
I said “bitch better have my money”.
Say Hello To My Little Friend – The New Executive Order
Dear Leader Barack, humbly accepting thunderous applause from millions of grateful citizens on Pennsylvania Avenue following his majestic fifth Inauguration Day speech, prepares an Executive Action for a “second amendment” terrorist discovered in the crowd by Dear Leader’s heroic Secret Service contingent.
“Good thing I’m not American, I’ll get to keep this thing!”
“I have a very strict gun control policy: if there’s a gun around, I want to be in control of it.” (originally – Clint Eastwood)
Gee thanks Joe, you know there is no way I could have passed that background check.
Look Ma, no barrel shroud!
‘Biden, get your shotguns!!!’
“Now, I know what you’re thinking, Joe. ‘Did he load that NY mag with ten rounds or only seven?’ To tell you the truth, I forgot myself amid all this proposed legislation. But being as this is a 5.56 McChrystal, the most powerful cartridge in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you have to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky?…Well? Do ya, Joe?”
You, flock of sheeple, you know why we’re here? Why don’t you tell my man Biden where you got the sh*t hid at?
Say ‘rights’ again. Say ‘rights’ again, I dare you, I double dare you muthaf****er, say rights one more Goddamn time!
Barack “Jules Winnfield” Obama
Say when
Let me be clear. I’m clinging to my gun and showing my antipathy to folks unlike me (i.e. non-Marxists).
‘Bama. James ‘Bama.
I’m the man up in this piece. You’ll never see the light of… who the fvck do you think you’re fvcking with? I’m the police, I run shit around here. You just live here. Yeah, that’s right, you better walk away. Go on and walk away… ’cause I’m gonna’ burn this motherfvcker down. King Kong ain’t got sh!t on me. That’s right, that’s right. Sh!t, I don’t, fvck. I’m winning anyway, I’m winning… I’m winning any motherfvcking way. I can’t lose. Yeah, you can shoot me, but you can’t kill me.
…an attempted robbery became a homicide on Pennsylvania avenue today. The suspect is a black male, approximately six foot two wearing a dark coat and apparently armed with an assault pistol. The victims, we assume are also black males…
“When the White House learned that President Obama’s ‘street cred’ had dipped drastically after inviting Justin Bieber to stay in the Lincoln bedroom, a bold plan to recreate his image got off to a somewhat tenuous start.”
‘Dammit Michelle, stop talkin’ about my small Glock!!!’
Hey Bill! Stop eying the girls and put your cigar in my hole!
yes!
“If they bring a knife to the fight, we bring a gun” (actual quote from Obama in Philadelphia on June 13th, 2008.
Love it!
Vote for gun control, or I will pop a cap in yo’ ass.
Smoke ’em if you’ve got ’em.
Hard to pick…
“Shut up before I wound you and leave you to suffer through Obamacare”
Or
“Think you can dodge this? You owe it to yourself to try.”
I tried to work horses and bayonets in but I came up dry.
“I took your gun and now you want to negotiate? LMAO!”
im not serious yet …
just wait till i turn this gun sideways
A scene from Point Break II: Point Barack
OFBG?
“You won’t believe what I found in the pocket of this coat!!”
“Damnit Michelle, I thought you were a Klingon…did you get a haircut?”
HA!
This thing needs one of those shoulder things that goes up.
Fk you, Alexander Hamilton!
+1
Thank you sir, you are a scholar but not a gentleman.
I know what you’re thinking, did he fire 7 shots or 8… well to be honest in all this confusion I don’t know myself…
Being as I’m the 44th President of the United States, the most powerful man in the world, and can have you extrajudicially executed, you got to ask yourself one question. Do I feel lucky? Well do ya, peon?
…I rushed through the door, double tap, bam bam, and that’s how I got bin Laden…
“Hiel………….I me Halt!!!!!!!!!…….ha, ha, ha, just kidding”
Rob Drummond
Hillsboro, NH
Recent budget have forced Secret Security cutbacks… the President has now been forced to take care of his own “protection”.
Obama: Ah, HELL no…
Should read:
Recent budget changes have forced Secret Security cutbacks… the President has now been forced to take care of his own “protection”.
Obama: Ah, HELL no…
“Instant dictator…uniform not included.”
2017: The Return of the Chicago Godfather.
Great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather of President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho-bama
Bill Clinton! I told you to keep away from my girls!
LOL, +1
“Shhhhh#*%t…..Secret Service ain’t THAT good!”
“I was made for this moment!”
GUNS FOR ME—NOT FOR THEE!
“Now that I’ve confiscated all your guns…. SUCKERS!!!!”
“And you thought I only had 7 rounds…hahaha”
“I wish a MF would come over here with that bullsh*t! John Wilkes Boothe my ass!”
“this is so much fun it should be illegal!!!…………wait a sec I can make that happen, gimme something to sign!”
***************This one has my vote *************
Barack announces that he will run for a third term and WILL win
My avatar disapeared, WTF!?
“Time to clear a few seats on the Supreme Court”
“If Wayne runs that video one more time”
“I know I won’t get flagged by the TSA at O’Hara”
“If ol’ Joe lets his mouth run away one more time”
As you can see my laws or polices do not apply to me I’ll carry what I want but you can’t
“I told you that when we took over, we’d have to kill some of y’all.”
It’s not illegal when the president does it.
Let me be clear… everyone gets a fair shot!
“Oh yeah? Well I say there ARE 57 states!!!”
“If this was solar-powered, we’d really have something!”
Making Fidel & Hugo proud.
“There you go again, Pilgrim.”
“Hey, where’s the bayonet for this thing?”
“I know what you’re thinking, punk. ‘Did he fire 13, 12, 11 or 10?’ And to tell you the truth, amidst all my lies, I kinda lost track myself.”
“I told you this election was about revenge!”
“I’m getting a third term whether you like it or not!”
“This is how Michelle gets the kids to eat their vegetables.”
When split-seconds count, and the Secret Service is seconds away.
I’ve got a dream too!
Hey Biden, hold my beer and watch this!
President Obama demonstrates how he will be a much more effective leader during his second term.
Mr. Obama was very excited about his new pistol until he discovered there was no ammunition available anywhere…
“Dear Dick, When can we go hunting?”
Yo, dude, I’m so gonna a put a cap in Yo’ Ol’ F…..G White Guy Ass if’n ya don’t get on board with my program, sucka.
Don’t be surprised. I’m not going to pay higher taxes, drive a hybrid, or use Obamacare either.
Who wants to give this nasty thing to Dianna to add to her evil Gun list
Brace yo self fool!
“Moron I be?” No, Mr. President… it’s Molon Labe!
“Mr. President, the gun isn’t necessary. Democrats just hand over campaign donations voluntarily…”
You musta thought it was white boy day.
Obama to David Gregory: “How’s it hangin’ Dave? Oh you’re good … just messin’ with ya.”
This is what happens….when you oppose….my dictatorship…ladies and gentlemen.
Obama: “Badges? I don’t need no steenking badges!”
Did I fire 7 shots or 8? I forgot if I put in my Presidential, High Cap Mag today.
Obama to George Soros: “Yeah I see Boehner. Should I do it?”
Ever since Michelle read “50 Shades of Grey,” it’s the only way I can get her to put he clothes back on. She’s got me by 35 lbs., so I need every edge I can get!
“Term limits? Sorry, I just issued an Executive Order making me President for Life. Did you have a problem with that?”
“How ’bout I put a cap in your 2nd Amendment!”
Come here and pull my finger!
-Happiness-
Being the only guy with a gun.
Ah-ah, I know what you’re thinking, Clint. You’re thinking, “Did he fire seven shots or only six?” And to tell you the truth, I’ve forgotten myself in all this “empty chair” excitement. But being this is a .45 ACP – the most powerful handgun in the world and will blow your head clean off, you’ve got to ask yourself a question: “Do I feel lucky?” Well, do ya, Clint?!
Hey homie is that my briefcase….
“How black is that?!?” – Jamie Fox
Silly clingers… Guns are for Gubberments.
Whats that you say? From your cold dead hands?
BAM BAM BAM
As Hillary Clinton was walking up the steps to the capitol building to give testimony on the Benghazi incident and Fast and Furious a shot rang out. Ms. Clinton died immediately and a suspect, described as a skinny Urkel looking dude, fled the scene in a white Ford Bronco. The driver of the getaway Bronco was described as a heavyset white guy with white hair puffing on a large cigar.
No arrests have been made.
Don’t worry, there is nothing in the clip.
“this conversation on gun control isn’t over until I say it is”
“Now THIS is what I call common sense gun control!”
No barrel shroud… I believe that makes this rocket launcher eligible.
“Ideas are far more powerful than guns. We don’t let our people have guns. Why should we let them have ideas?”
— Joseph Stalin
“You bring a knife…I bring a gun. You send one of mine to the hospital, I send one of yours to the morgue…THAT’S THE CHICAGO WAY!”
“If only I hadn’t banned the shoulder thing that goes up I could really use one right now”
“Mine’s bigger than yours…AND I’ve got brass balls.”
“Heh heh, never said I’d remove ALL the guns”
“I said turn over YOUR guns, not mine”
“No its cool officer, I only loaded 7 rounds!”
“Oh, you mean I’m supposed to point this thing in the other direction to commit suicide”?
or
“What direction am I supposed to point this thing to commit suicide”?
Just for Men Touch of Gray Hair Treatment: $10
Handmade Georges de Paris suit (with China made US Flag pin): $4,500
“Leading the People” with my newly acquired Colt “Government” Model 1911: Priceless
“Excuse me while I whip this out.”
+1.
Nice Mel Brooks…
Son, you’re on your own…
SUCKERS!!! Now bow to your new King.
“Obama succumbs to panic buying”
“Because I’m better than you, that’s why!”
“Somebody picked the wrong lefty pinko liberal.”
“Inauguration’s over, what’d you think was going to happen the second time around? Watch, wallet, and guns… let’s go, hand ’em over.”
All these years I’ve been holding this stupid thing sideways in the manner I was shown by the local youths, back in my organizing days…I just noticed there were dots on top of this thing – anybody know what they do?
This is the last gun left in America and it’s mine. You guys are a bunch of pussies!
The Commander in Chief doesn’t shoot from the hip.
In his own words: “I won; get over it.”
Always a quick learner, President Obama looks pleased with the results of James Yeager’s suggestions.
Keep the change you filthy animal!
You’ve got to ask yourself, do you feel lucky. Well do you America.
He managed to be both every 7/11 clerks and Congresses worst nightmare. Bravo
I’m special. You’re not!
Now that I have more “flexibility” time to take aim at my true enemy; people that think for themselves.
Break yourself constitutionally protected rights.
“Well, no one else wanted to enforce mandatory confiscation… so here I am! If you want something done right, do it yourself!”
And I thought I had to worry about bad guys with guns, but this is even more terrifying.
There’s this passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. “The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.” I been saying that sh*t for years. And if you heard it, that meant your a$$. I never gave much thought to what it meant. I just thought it was some cold-blooded sh*t to say to a motherf***er before I popped a cap in his a$$. But I saw some sh*t this morning made me think twice. See, now I’m thinking, maybe it means you’re the evil man, and I’m the righteous man, and Mr. 9 millimeter here, he’s the shepherd protecting my righteous a$$ in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you’re the righteous man and I’m the shepherd and it’s the world that’s evil and selfish. I’d like that. But that sh*t ain’t the truth. The truth is, you’re the weak, and I’m the tyranny of evil men…
… of course the peasants are revolting…thier peasants….PULL.
Do you feel luck Republican, well do you?
You thought all animals were equal?
Say “Right of the people” one more time! I dare you!
“The Constitution makes a great target!”
Here’s your “high capacity magazine”, Bitch!
“no you can’t”
“its called executive ‘action’ now for a reason”
“…Playing with my money is like playing with my emotions, congress”
-big worm in “friday”
“Gimme all your money! Don’t forget the change!”
“Good?… Bad?… I’m the guy with the gun.”
-ash in “army of darkness”
“Fill your hand you sonofabitch!”
This AK-47 belongs in the hands of soldiers, not in the hands of criminals
“Why you Glock blocking me bro?”
“This thing is SWEET! Go ahead and send 10,000 of them to Egypt…”
While I may favor common-sense gun control laws, that doesn’t keep me from reaching out to NRA members
Allahu Akbar
2nd Amendment? We don’t need no 2nd Amendment!
Let me be clear, I didn’t mean my guns, I only meant yours.
Django unchained
That one life you save might just be your own.
I is going to bust a cap in that Kenyan shit fly that keeps buzzing me during my press conferences!
Mr. President’s weekly target practice with the Bill of Rights.
I got your back America…TWO in your back…
Dear America,
FOAD.
Sincerely, Barack
He pulled first. It was justified.
Did you think I was packing Rainbows and Hugs?
That’s right, I am half cracker when it comes to my pistola…
“Well, he was right about a kind word and a gun but the smile sure doesn’t hurt, right kids?”
Hi, I’m Barack Obama and welcome to Jackass.
Hey Michelle! Bill showed me this new move, it’s called the smoking gun. Are you down?
Ryan was standing next to Uncle Joe when BHO took a shot in their direction…………..laughing BHO said “ah shit I missed!!!”
…and that’s the last thing Bin Ladin heard before I capped that mf’er in the head.
“Hey Diane, you made sure us Big People can still have these in your bill right?”
I’m sorry it posted so many times, when I was on the mobile version it kept telling me that the comment failed to post. I switchedd to the full version and posted it and now I see that it posted all the ones I was told failed. Trying to figure out a way to delete them now.
Hey O Where you going with that gun in your hand
I said Hey O Where you going with that gun in your hand
Gonna shoot that old fat white guy,
He’s got a Disease called Republican.
” I’m a little aroused”
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