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  1. I know our political stance are different but save you anyways! . Just don’t wet yourself over the pistol.

  2. An ad touting the security in the early days of Enterprise before it was a car service- “We’ll pick you up.”

  3. Christopher Nolan (to Tom Hardy & Christian Bale): “Ok, Tom, you throw Chris up on your shoulder, like in this picture, then lift him over your head and say…”

    Hardy: “I was wondering what would break first – your spirit or your body.”

    Nolan: “Then hit him with a backbreaker and drop him.”

  4. Listen to me good!
    Me and elvis here are doing a duet even if it means i gotta ventilate ya!
    I can too sing! You’ll see!
    Saloon hall 7:00 show.

  5. Why do i carry a gun, you ask? I tried carrying a cop. Too heavy. Then I tried carrying this plainclothes detective, thinking “hey, less gear.” Nope. Still too heavy.

    So now I’m bringing him back and I’m just gonna carry a gun.

  6. When Wyatt yells “DOC… BEHIND US!!!”… Grab a human shield for front and back protection.

    Since you’re shooting a Colt Lightening you won’t have to worry about fanning your pistol in single action with a guy over your shoulder.

  7. ‘I told him if I saw Dippity Doo on his hair one more time ,I was haulin’ his ass off to jail, now get out of my way!

  8. “After trying it himself, Billy still couldn’t see why folks were so excited about this new ‘body armor’ thing.”

  9. I think Kirk was Doc Holiday in this flick , with Burt Lancaster and the guy that rode with Peter Fonda and Nicolson in Easy Rider , what’s his name , the acid head .

  10. The flaw in the old “shoot your partner in the knee if a bear is chasing you advice” is that if the gunshot scares off the bear you’re stuck with carrying your now crippled partner back to town.

    And the sheriff is gonna want that gun shot wound explained.

  11. The flaw in most responses to this contest is that Kirk Douglas was staunchly anti-gun. So…

    “Well of course *I* carry a gun and a bodyguard. It’s just that any of you that aren’t Important Hollywood Liberals shouldn’t be armed.”

    Johnny Cash: “So, if you’re against guns, Kirk – why do you use them to earn a living in films?”

    Kirk Douglas: *waves around the set* “Hey – it’s only make believe.”

    Johnny Cash: *pointed look* “Nah. It’s just make money.”

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