Weekend Photo Caption Contest

Keanu Reeves


  1. avatar David says:

    That’ll teach you to put a ding in my car door! (It’s about time someone put a KSG in a movie.)

    1. avatar insertjjs says:

      Its been in 2 movies. A good day to Die Hard and Bullet to the head

      1. avatar 24/7 Pro says:

        I think he meant GOOD movies.

        1. avatar insertjjs says:

          its going to be a Keenu Reeves movie. We’ll need to keep waiting.

  2. avatar SteveInCO says:

    That’s one hell of a leaf blower.

  3. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    The new ‘fine’ for parking in a handicapped space without a placard. East LA style.

  4. avatar Mike Crognale says:

    I. Will. Never. Forget. My. Car keys. Again.

  5. avatar Mike says:

    Here, we see a piece of wood lighting up a human for a change

  6. avatar Daniel Silverman says:

    There was a spider on my windshield. I got it though!

    1. avatar Geoff says:

      Winner winner chicken dinner

  7. avatar Nine says:

    At least the EOtech is mounted right.

  8. avatar Daniel C-W says:

    Take my cupcake will you…

  9. avatar pirateye says:

    New remote keyless entry system.

  10. avatar Wyfaggro says:

    Who is a sad Keanu now?

  11. avatar neiowa says:

    Get a shave and a haircut and start acting like a man peckerhead.

  12. avatar tmm says:

    Greasy hair. Greasy gun. Damn fine suit.

  13. avatar BT in Afghan says:

    Sorry! Wrong car.

  14. avatar Avenger1 says:

    How does this trigger thingy work again?? oops…!

  15. avatar lolinski says:

    Last time they let the taximeter run

  16. avatar Mr. Bad Timing says:

    If these pellets aren’t moving at least 1500 fps… Well… Either way your head is going to pop like a melon…

  17. avatar KCK says:

    Although a little noisy, the city stated that Tru-Green Environmental Company’s state of the art machinery was the reason that they were awarded the sidewalk chewing gum removal contract.

  18. avatar speedracer5050 says:

    “Sonofabitch!! It is built Ford Tough”!!!

  19. avatar Jon R. says:

    I told the rent a car company, I want a car with a god damn sun roof!

  20. avatar A-Rod says:

    Does this gun make my butt look big?

  21. avatar AaronW says:

    With a different shotgun I would have called this one, “Johnny UTAS”

  22. avatar Shwiggie says:

    So he finally laid his air guitar aside.

  23. avatar Bob says:

    NOW you can park in this handicapped zone!

  24. avatar ShaunL says:

    “I wanted the one with the sunroof” she said…. Well HERE’S YOUR DAMN SUNROOF BABY!

  25. avatar Evan says:


  26. avatar Seek1234 says:


    1. avatar Javier says:

      Dammit I was too late

  27. avatar RockOnHellChild says:

    This is how Neo deals with parking tickets in the Matrix…

  28. avatar Paul G. says:

    This is one weird fire extinguisher.

  29. avatar Wendell says:

    “There is no windshield.”

    1. avatar Liberty2Alpha says:


  30. avatar Logan says:

    “Baby on Board” sticker? Use the KSG’s dual magazine system to switch to birdshot instead of buckshot.

  31. avatar JasonM says:

    “I said, you’re blocking my [email protected] driveway!

  32. avatar William Burke says:

    DAMN! I went to the store and forgot shampoo AGAIN!!!

  33. avatar Sixpack70 says:

    I’ve got a KSG! Whoa!

  34. avatar Nanashi says:

    Now my hair looks like Snape’s, and my car still won’t fly…

  35. avatar tom says:

    Special effects… helping Kel-tecs function (each and every shot)

  36. avatar rammerjammer says:

    Hold my beer and watch this. Where’s the safety…?

  37. avatar John L. says:

    Bobby, desperately trying to remove the “gift of the foul fowl” from his custom paint job…

  38. avatar DrVino says:

    Call me a greasy douchebag again!

  39. avatar Gregolas says:

    Due to the bad economy, the rat bounty in NYC brought out all kinds of desperadoes .

  40. avatar Pete says:

    THIS will un-stick the blasted sun roof!

  41. avatar vioshi says:

    After a spill, workers at an epoxy manufacturer had to use new innovative methods to remove bird poop from thier cars.

  42. avatar MOG says:

    See what happens if I don’t shave?

  43. avatar Craig M. says:

    Die Career! Die!

  44. avatar Stephen Rivera says:

    “There has GOT to be a better way to defrost the rear windows!”

  45. avatar pirateye says:

    I called shotgun!

  46. avatar Salty Bear says:

    Auto insurance AUGmentation.

  47. avatar Todd S says:


  48. avatar jsallison says:

    “Hello, I’m Keanu Reeves. I don’t really play Keanu Reeves all the time but when I do loud noises and disintegrating props helps the audience forget I’m here.”

    1. avatar jsallison says:

      And fyi, England, having already lost the ashes to the aussies again, have an outside shot to win the 4th test and salvage a bit of pride.

  49. avatar A. C. says:

    “I got some cables and I tried to jump it
    I got a shotgun and I’m gonna pump it!”

    – from the song “Push My Car” by the Weatherheads – from the Car Talk Car Tunes Volume I CD

  50. avatar Rambeast says:

    *BOOM* “Woah…”

    1. avatar Liberty2Alpha says:


  51. avatar Mark says:

    See…. You DO aim through an EOTech with both eyes open! Works at Close Range, too!!

  52. avatar Lucas D. says:

    Ah, I see the long awaited Bill & Ted/Terminator crossover has finally gotten the greenlight.

  53. avatar SpeleoFool says:

    KSG — KelTec Stationwagon Gun

  54. avatar SpeleoFool says:

    24 hours later….

    (*phone rings*)

    Keanu: “uh, hello?”

    Man on phone: “Yes, Mr. Reeves? My name is Mark, and I’m with Progressive Insurance. We got your photo of the, uh, ‘hail damage’ you sent. I’m afraid the damage looks, uh, well, it looks a little suspicious. We’re going to need to ask you a few questions before we can cover your claim.”

    1. avatar Liberty2Alpha says:

      Ah, so I’m not the only insurance appraiser around these parts…

  55. avatar Hasdrubal says:

    I thought he knew kung-fu?

  56. avatar Nick says:

    So your’e telling me my car can dodge bullets?

    1. avatar Liberty2Alpha says:


  57. avatar Wielsucker (@Wielsucker) says:

    See if you call me the “worst actor of all time” again…. (seriously, worse than Kevin Costner and Ben Stiller combined)

  58. avatar Phil says:

    I know Kung Fu.

  59. avatar RandallOfLegend says:

    Now that I am getting older I need to put holographic sights on my shotguns to hit a car at 3 feet

  60. avatar Glimmer says:

    Hi, I’m Joe Hollywood. Join with me to help ban guns and stop violence. Oh, and don’t miss my new film, Killemshootemblowemup.

  61. avatar Dimakorayno says:

    I’m from TRIPLE Aught, not AAA. Now watch me short stroke this baby!

  62. avatar Thomas Haller says:

    I knew I should have left my wipers up!

  63. avatar MrVigs says:

    I changed my mind. I want the blue pill.

  64. avatar ErrantVenture11 says:

    Sad Keanu makes his case for universal background checks.

  65. avatar Tim says:

    Dang, these Presidential Limos really are up armored……..

  66. avatar Dustin Eward says:

    “Guns. Lots of Guns… Oh, wait, a KSG. Nevermind, this is all I need.”

  67. avatar Mark Horning says:

    Sorry, Holyweird bought up all the KSGs. None for YOU!

  68. avatar Liberty2Alpha says:

    “You killed Ted you medieval dickweed!”

  69. avatar jwm says:

    “Say hello to my little friend!”

  70. avatar Scythian Arrows says:

    “I am an A… T… F… agent!”

  71. avatar Trime says:

    Damn Ants!

  72. The highly trained staff at Cold Shot Chillers is extremely proficient at manufacturing unique chiller systems.

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