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You could argue that Captain Phasma needn’t worry about whom she does or doesn’t laser with his SB-Tactical brace-equipped laser blaster. Storm Troopers, after all, are a dime a dozen. If nothing else, Ren’s carry method shows poor discipline. And as Yoda taught us, about the discipline it always is. (So did General Kala in Flash Gordon, but that’s another story.) Let’s just hope – or not – that Cap’s more accurate with her weapon than her Storm Troopers, whose aim is notoriously suspect. Would the top-mounted sighting system help? Good luck with that helmet. I don’t see an adjustable comb for a decent cheek weld, either. You’re welcome. [Note: An earlier version of this post ID’ed the rifle-wielder as Kylo Ren.]

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  1. You f_cktard they are clones. They are all the same. They don’t need adjustable stocks.
    Duma$$ bantha fodder.

    • They aren’t clones. The original grand army of the republic was comprised of clones yes, and many were integrated and apart of vader’s fist (the 501st legion), but the clones would be in their genetic 60’s around the time of a new hope. These troopers are not clones, they’re conscripts, many poorly trained at that.

      • [nerd crap]Yeah, the clones were retired well before A New Hope and The Force Awakens takes place roughly 34 years after Episode IV. There’s a CGI series running right now called Rebels that’s part of the new canon, set about five years before Ep 4, and in it the main characters find some old clone troopers rolling around on an AT-TE complaining about how they’ve been declared obsolete and the Stormtroopers who replaced them are just a bunch of random conscripted idiots[nerd crap]

    • They haven’t been clones for ages. Even in the original trilogy, they were all different heights.

      Now time to drop some nerd knowledge.
      In Attack of the Clones they said that the clones growth was accelerated and that they reached adulthood in 10 years. The clone wars ended 19 years before A New Hope so assuming they ended the cloning process after the war (or cut it back by a lot) the last batch of clones would physically be about 58 by the time Luke Skywalker was running around, by now, the are definitely all dead.

      • Yeah, in the Rebels show, which takes place about 5 BBY, Captain Rex and his clone brothers look like old men in their late 60s. Considering they were made about 30 years ago at double aging, it works out about right.

        • “I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe; a six year-old building effete robots…Rastafarian retard aliens. Blah, blah tears in the rain… …time…to die…”

    • people need to actually read the books before commenting on star wars.

      clones cost to much! they were dropped after Costs made a galaxy wide military almost impossible. they went to virtually free troops, peasents or Forced service, then it became volentary and a career.

      much like todays military. the social engineering side of the empire raised taxes so high that you had no choice but to serve or work for “other businesses” aka organized crime approved by the governement. Star Wars is an example of where we are headed. you Comply and be a good subject, or dont and still do as your told or they toss you in jail.

      at the time of the new hope most “economies” relay on empire to provide food shelter and other needs while people work as needed to get these benefits. any cash is on the side or by other means.

      they Tax you 90% and you can only become rich or just wealthy within the empire or as a criminal in the eyes of the empire.

      Just Rome in space.

      • oh yeah ownership of property…. lol barely exists. if the TPP passes, they finish off all the above for us now. euro free trade and tpp will end all property rights, even control of you labor, education, healthcare, and your children.

        it is all part of the “Global Economy” anything that has even the smallest impact on the Economy will be 100% under their control. All land, resources, and yes even your ideas aka Patents will no longer yours. as of last year all currency in any bank is no longer your property but a loan to the bank.

        all the laws but 2 have been passed and only require enforcement.

        onky the 2nd amendement and 80 million gun owners are stopping these laws from being enforced. Armed they will not do a thing and wait. Unarmed …. the nazis would look like Capitalists vs what is already on the books. yes Barry has passed the majority 70% of these laws added into existing laws passed like Stimulus/ACA same bill. and over 200k new regulations. TPP is the last nail! if it happens, the small arms treaty will eradicate our 2nd amendment and autherize Russia, China, and others to “enforce” = Invade our nation to confiscate our weapons. end of the USA.

        people need to read bills!

  2. You would think that the helmet would have modern display technology so the gun could be aimed accurately from various positions without having to bring it up to the eye.

    • Right? I was trying at the humor of being an over the top super nerd in my post above, and then was immediately out nerded. Good for all of you.
      But you all do know, if you ain’t Mando, you ain’t shit.

  3. First-world problems on full display. It’s like reading angry twelve year olds posting on a forum about video games.

  4. When did the jerks at take over my gun info web site? Dorks ruin everything. Forget it, I’ll just go back to playing solitaire at work.

  5. They lost me “pod racing”…and I went to the original way back in the 70’s. My kids made me take ’em to the last 3 . Waiting for the next Captain America…

  6. There’s the types of people in this thread: those who know what’s going on, and those who are calling us on being nerds.

    • Then there’s the third type: Those who know what’s going on and still call everyone else nerds…

      • Full disclosure: not much of a star wars nerd. Huge mandalorian nerd. No, there is no contradiction.

        • Full disclosure: if someone made a level 3 or greater plate set that looked like mando armor, I’d buy it in a heartbeat. Or at least around tax season. I wouldn’t care about the cracks in the armor, it’d stop .30-06 AP just from sheer awesomeness.

        • @Grindstone

          Full disclosure: I lied, cheated, and stole Bill the Bothan to victory. That as my D20 character you get one guess what his species was…

  7. And the fourth kind, us spectators that have a basic clue, but don’t care. We just watch the back and forth geek-off.

  8. Listen up Robert Farago, you scruffy looking nerf herder! You might be able to bulls-eye womp rats back home in your T-16, but analyzing Star Wars ain’t like dusting crops kid. Leave the Star Wars stuff to those more qualified to do the Kessel run in less than 12 par secs, bantha breath!

  9. Man you guys calling everyone dorks must be really cool, as you post of a speciality forum for something you are passionate about….

    • Surely there’s at least a little bit of difference between being passionate about your rights vs. being passionate about a series of not-particularly-good children’s movies.

      • Star Wars features amputations and planet destruction, along with the obvious implications of blowing up the death star over Endor. And yes, I’m glad those Ewoks burned.

        • Not to mention Luke Skywalker, who could be seen as coming from a great order of space hippies who are all about truth, justice, and fairness mannnnn, who is also an archetypal good guy and protagonist of the original trilogy, single-handedly killed 1.2-1.7 million people by destroying Death Star 1 and directly contributed to the deaths of about 2.5 million other people from his actions on Endor and Death Star 2… Oh yea and he killed his father.

          Like many movies that can be considered appropriate for children there are often 2 levels of things happening. The kid stuff here is good versus evil, the adult stuff is the implications of the horrors of a galaxy at war.

  10. They are stormtroopers. They can’t hit anything anyways! The safest place is right in front of the gun with them.

    • Unless you’re a jawa or one of those poor bastards fleeing the imperial star destroyer in a new hope. Then you’re screwed because then the troopers decide to hit things.

      • Darth Vader: These troopers can’t hit anything.
        Dark Helmet: Have you tried ordering them to fire warning shots?
        Darth Vader: Brilliant! They hit them 100% of the time now.

      • That’s because they are unfortunate enough to be stuck in a role that doesn’t come with plot armor.

  11. All I’ve got to say is that hopefully their aim is better than the A-Team’s. They were worse with those Ruger Mini-14s than Ray Charlse with a TCP…

  12. I will say it’s actually nice to see some lighthearted BS on TTAG.

    And yeah, I’m not a huge SW nerd, but I have a feeling the character’s helmet is equipped with all sorts of targeting enhancements, and the “scope” on the rifle is a camera for that system. SWR’s next-gen product line being previewed, perhaps?

  13. Oh, storm troupers, your effectiveness is determined by what the plot calls for, consistency be damned.

    Yes instill have no idea how the equivalent of Army Rangers in head to toe hard body armor with blasters can be taken out by stone age killer teddy bears.

    • StormTroopers aren’t trained like the police who flash bang babies. They hesitated it’s how those ewoks won. Cuteness killed the empire

  14. If this Star Wars movie is any good, you can bet Hollywood will turn it into a franchise and there will be prequels coming out 15-20 months later.

  15. I’m enjoying the humorous banter, but on a more serious note, I seem to recall an ominous line from the last movie in the Star Wars series, that may yet apply to our own future.

    “So this is how liberty dies…with thunderous applause.”

  16. “Full disclosure: I played a Star Wars D20 D&D-style game.”

    Pffft…Star Wars D6 rules circa 1987 FTW.

    • Yes! That was one of the funnest games I’ve ever played.

      I bought the D20 sourcebooks a few years ago, and except for the Star Wars universe info, was highly disappointed. D20 systems tend to be simplistic where realism is most important and complex in all the wrong ways.

      Of course the timing and the people have a lot to do with it. A great group of guys to game with, and the GM was a young kid who knew the Star Wars universe better than all the nerds in this thread combined and could put together a darn good gaming storyline to boot. Me, 20 years later, trying to run a Star Wars game while learning an unfamiliar system that I don’t like very much…yeah.

  17. Funny thing about the Stormtroopers–whenever a member of the main cast isn’t around (a high-value target for the Empire) the troopers show that they are in fact a brutal and scarily-effective fighting force. Obi-Wan speaks about the troopers’ expert marksmanship when they’re looking at the ambushed sandcrawler and speaks quite highly of them. This is a man who’s dealt with these troopers in the past–he’d know what he was talking about.

    The real reason the troopers’ aim goes to pot when the main cast is around is twofold. First, the whole “high-value target” thing. Leia espeically is to be taken alive, as well as her companions if at all possible. This means the troopers have to pull their punches a bit, so to speak. In order to lead the Empire to the rebel base, Solo and the Falcon need to get away and they can’t do that if they’re dead. So they deliberately miss in order to make it look like they barely made it out alive. (Leia even remarks that they got away too easily..she knew something was up).

    The second big reason? Plot armor.

  18. “[Note: Am earlier version of this post ID’ed the rifle-wielder as Kylo Ren, That was Dan’s fault.]”

    Hey, Dan, while you’re under the bus, can you check for fluid leaks?

  19. Two things

    1) Capt Phasma is a she, not a he. Gwendoline Christie is the actress behind the armor.
    2) Its not a laser. Its a blaster.

    • This is why I generally stick to writing about things I know about, or leave it to an expert. Thanks for all the corrections. I was WAY out of my depth on this one. If there’s someone who wants to review the next Star Wars movie for TTAG, please send an email to with REVIEWER in the subject bar and some sort of writing sample in the body of the email. Thanks! TEXT AMENDED!

  20. muzzle discipline is good, he/she is not pointing the weapon in a safe direction, toward the camera. sooo this is too stupid. its a movie. watch out for your own muzzle discipline. everyone violates it sooner or later.

  21. An SB Tactical Brace you say? Damn the democrats must be bad in the future, even the military has to comply with SBR laws in the Empire!

    (Seriously, I’m an Empire man. Crush those rebel scum Liberals!)

    • *That was supposed to be “Seriously though…”.

      (There was also a joke going around up here in Soviet Canuckistan about the Conservatives being “the Empire” and the Liberals being the “Rebels”, I voted for the Empire in the slight hope we might get to keep our gun rights…Was for naught unfortunately and there is a huge round of panic buying going around…I myself acquired a new XCR…)

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