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Mr. Mohr's killing field (courtesy

“Keith Mohr was in the shower last Friday morning when he heard a loud crash and his wife screaming that a deer was running through their townhouse near Sugar Grove,” Illinois’ reports. The 71-year-old homeowner grabbed a golf club (caliber unknown) and took a bash at the unwelcome visitor. He knocked off an antler and broke the club. “Mohr [then] opened the garage door to give the buck an escape route, but it didn’t exit there. It kept running around, bleeding on the carpet, destroying furniture, punching holes in walls and pawing at closed windows to escape. ‘He did a lot of damage. A lot of damage . . .

I just chased him around for probably 10 minutes. It looked like a (Charles) Manson murder — blood everywhere.’

Mohr opened a living room window and the deer finally escaped. All of which could have been avoided with a carefully placed shot or two from a home (shower?) carry firearm or a last ditch defense tactical shotgun. It would have been a more ethical kill and Mohr would have had venison to spare. [h/t DanRRZ]

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  1. He was in Illinois.The granola people would have eaten him alive in the press for shooting a “poor, defenseless animal”.


  2. I think that in most states, the carcass would have been confiscated, and the constabulary would have either shared the meat, or it would have been buried at a usual site, designated officially. You can often find these sites in roadside or cloverleafs; they are obvious on account of all the sad-looking buzzards, sitting on the soil, looking hungrily upon the earth on which they sit.

    Seriously, what sort of twisted municipal mentality denies BUZZARDS a free meal?

    • In Illinois, or more specifically in Will County where I live, for cases like fatal deer / car collisions end with the Sheriff notifying folks who will come and collect the deer for harvesting unless the damage is so severe or that the time or conditions are such that the meat is no longer safe. I think the driver may even be given dibs in a lot of cases if they seem so inclined. I have a buddy who works for the Highway Dept. that gets several deer a year like this.

      I’d bet the homeowner out in Sugar Grove (rural with some subdivisions about 40 miles west of Chicago) would have had the option to do so had the situation turned out differently.

      Just remember to say “Look out, he’s coming right at us!” before you shoot and you’re golden 😉

        • I would recommend a silenced ar-15 over a 12ga. This is why we need to repeal the NFA. A man should be able to kill a buck trashing his house with out disturbing the neighbors.

  3. OK, first I can’t drink anything while reading TTAG, because someone (not mentioning any names, but his initials are Ralph), will make a comment and whatever I’m drinking will spew out my mouth or out my nose.

    Now I can’t eat while reading posts?

    • I remember while living in Culpeper, VA, a deer got into a gas station rest room in the middle of the night, because it was left unlocked. The damn deer destroyed itself, and every thing in the rest room – it had to cleansed of the blood and carnage, and the sink and toilet had to be replaced.

      Very skittish and panicky, those deer.

  4. In the immortal words of Piglet “Oh D-d-d-deer!”

    Insurance would cover the damage, and I’d be that much closer to a full freezer.

  5. Several things would have come to mind…er…hand before I would have taken a golf club to the Buck.

    Here such deer are issued salvage tags and the driver/home owner can eat said critter. That is also assuming police involvement. First call should be Insurance agent and if they do not need a police report for the claim, don’t get one.

  6. OMG and also LOL, as much as all of the damage and blood stains really suck for the homeowners.

    This also reminds me of the defensive gun use of the day thread from a couple days ago where we had a little chat about removing blood stains and the response was “just how often are you shooting people in your house to know the best way to remove a blood stain?!?!?” Well… again… there are lots of ways to get blood on carpet, furniture, towels, etc that do not involve anybody being shot haha

  7. That’s pretty ridiculous. Good thing neither the man nor his wife were injured. Stuff can be fixed/replaced.

    On the other hand, chasing the deer for 10 minutes was probably a bad idea. If shooting it was out, he should have opened every door that led to the outside, and then just left the deer alone. It would have probably found its way out peacefully just fine if it wasn’t being spooked by a man chasing it and (I’m guessing) a woman screaming.

      • Mr. Burke, if you and I were ever face to face, I have a brand new set of many-colored Sharpies I’d like to gift you with. I would then like to send you out in the world as an auto-corrective-device for all of the misspellings on doors into 7-11s, dry cleaners, etc. (not that your misspelling was stupid, Matt). I do NOT, however, what to hear about you falling to your death trying to overpaint signs over the NY Thruway.

        However, in the interests of being corrective myself , “LED” is an acronym for light-emitting diode, although I believe I got you point.


        • “Gift” is a NOUN, not a verb, Rastus! We already have a perfectly good verb for the process: GIVE.

          Language is a sacred GIFT; stop butchering it! 🙂

        • Oh my god. The word “cromulent” makes me sick to my stomach. I beg you, never use that again!

        • “Their”? So I criticize your grammar, and you reply with WORSE grammar? Did you draw with crayons your senior year?

        • It’s already forgotten. I’ve got no time for grudge-building. I don’t want to die with ANY grudges… except maybe against my criminal government.

        • I did forget the joke/sarc, but I was actually trying to poke fun at 505markf for applauding your corrective efforts and ending with “I believe I got you point.” That struck me as near Monty Python levels of rididiculous.

          For what it’s worth, I do take some pride in almost never needing spell check while typing.

        • Except, as it turns out, when my fingers are frozen and shaking, and I’m trying to spell ‘ridiculous.’ Apologies to all, it’s 25 degrees out here.

    • Yeah, I gotta think if you’re not going to go full lethal and shoot the thing, then beating it with random household objects isn’t going to help the situation. Open the doors and back away. It’s going to wreck your house either way, no sense risking getting clocked with a sharp hoof or gored by an antler.

      • Oh GOD, yes! It’s going to inflict monumental damage, not matter what. At least don’t become part of the damage. If one ever came into my house, I’d be going straight for my 12-gauge, upstairs. #4 Buck at short range will do the trick, at least the second one will….

  8. Back in the late 1980’s, I was an Army LT at Fort Devens, Massachusetts. A squirrel got into my neighbors home when they left a window screen open. It literally destroyed their kitchen! The carnage left by one squirrel was amazing.

  9. “I swear I’ve seen a log of stuff in my life, but that… was.. *Awesome!*”

    “But, sorry about your house, man. That… that sucks.”

  10. Oh come on … now I have to start home carry of a deer rifle, or at least a .44 Magnum revolver with a long barrel.


    • Then you obviously have no idea that the hooves of deer are extremely sharp and that the man could have been seriously hurt or even killed. I personally keep a gun near me so that being said…the day I find a deer in my house is the day I have venison shortly afterwards. Or maybe dog, because I missed and hit the dog. lol (It was a joke. I don’t eat black labs.)

  11. There is a lot to think about before you can safely be discharging a gun in the typical house. Do you know where everyone else who might be in the house is? Could the bullet go through a wall and hit someone outside or at a neighbor’s house. Could the deer hit you at the wrong time and cause you to shoot yourself? Do you know where and how to shoot a deer to actually kill it or is your hunting experience for something else like elephants or ducks. Do you have the right kind of gun for killing deer? Has the deer left while you were thinking about the questions above?

    • My favorite of those is the last one. Open all the doors, retreat to safety, and think it through. You may find that the deer has left in the interim.

      This policy is not recommended for home-invading burglars, to be clear.


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