Weekend Photo Caption Contest: Win a Telor Tactical ComfortAir Ankle Holster


Enter the best caption by Sunday midnight and you’ll win a Telor Tactical right-handed ComfortAir ankle holster.


  1. avatar Mikial says:

    “I sure hope no one notices that these guns aren’t loaded.”

  2. avatar Jake says:

    God gave me two eyes so I can cover two bad guys.

  3. avatar John L. says:

    …well, heck, partner if I have lazy eye I might as well make the best of it.

  4. avatar John says:

    A mans got to know his limitations.

  5. avatar Justin says:

    From tombstone but in barney fife’so voice, “I have two guns, one for each of you.”

  6. avatar jwm says:

    “Get off my lawn!’

  7. avatar jwm says:

    The Stink Eye Kid living up to his rep.

  8. avatar JackieO says:

    Gecko eyes?

  9. avatar mark_anthony_78 says:

    Cross-eyed dominant.

  10. avatar BlackoutFan says:

    I’ve got two guns… One for each of you…

  11. avatar Colt Magnum says:

    “Jack Elam taught me everything I know about gunslinging!”

  12. avatar Mikele says:

    Don’t lecture me about no dang trigger discipline! I’ve been shoot’n these hog-legs since before you were a twinkle in your daddies eye.

  13. avatar Henry says:

    “Here’s where being wall-eyed is a real advantage!”

  14. Alright, which one of you SOBs is Miculek?

  15. avatar Koop says:

    “Freeze, dirtbags! I’m ambidextrous!”

  16. avatar Cliff H says:

    Don’t care about your expensive Deagle, mister, I got you covered by my two Replica Arms six-shooters!

  17. avatar C.S. says:

    Picture proof that Hollywood hasn’t changed

  18. avatar Smoke Jensen says:

    One riot, one Ranger.

    1. avatar Smoke Jensen says:

      Or. This Rangers a riot!

  19. avatar jwm says:

    Dementia sucks.

  20. avatar Bobinmi says:

    the precise moment that the lone ranger’s dementia caused him to go blind.

  21. avatar jeremiah kindel says:

    Damn your eyes.
    To late.

  22. avatar Eric says:

    The only way to cure constipation is to hold 2 handguns…

  23. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    (Sung to the Kim Carnes tune “She’s got Betty Davis eyes”)

    ?He’s got Marty Feldman eyes?

    1. avatar jwm says:

      I miss Marty Feldman.

      1. avatar Geoff PR says:

        Dr. Frankenstein: “Igor, get the bags.”

        Igor: (Doing an off-the-cuff Groucho Marx imitation) “You take the blonde, I’ll take the one in the turban…”

        And who can forget – “What hump?”

  24. avatar SkyMan77 says:

    For the last time… Keep the beans out of the chili!!!

    It ain’t chili if it’s got beans!!!!

  25. avatar Earl cantwell says:

    “Wish I hadn’t had that lazy eye corrected”

  26. avatar Wdlong says:

    They told me to shoot with both eyes open.

  27. avatar Wdlong says:

    They told me to shoot with both eyes open

  28. avatar larrylarry says:

    Feinstein? Clinton? Feinstein? Clinton?

  29. avatar Phil LA says:

    Rick James, bitch.

  30. avatar Phil LA says:

    PC Load Letter. What the f*** does that mean?

  31. avatar Soccerchainsaw says:

    He’s a man of distinction with his teacup pinky extended don’t you know….

  32. avatar Pantera Vazquez says:

    I’ll shoot you with my right gun, or b!tchslap you with my cap gun,
    but you are giving up that there fangled ankle holster sonny………

  33. avatar jsallison says:

    Sorry, if you don’t have Jack Elam eyes, you ain’t doin’ it right.

  34. avatar Rick K says:

    I know they’re fake. I’m going to overpower you with mind control.

    1. avatar Stu in AZ says:

      Not if my brain control can help it!

  35. avatar jwm says:

    Bubba HoTep, motherphucker!

  36. avatar CZ Peasy says:

    “With two guns I don’t have to reload after each shot!”

  37. avatar rogerthat says:

    I’ve got you now….. wherever you are

  38. avatar Jasonius says:

    Now. Who turned on that ad blocker.


  39. avatar John Smith says:

    I’ll give up my cap guns when you pry my cold, dead eyes off of… wait. Don’t reckon that’s how it goes…

  40. avatar Newshawk says:

    2016 Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton announced today her nominee for the head of Homeland Security…

    1. avatar Bill B says:


  41. avatar Steve in TX says:

    Point shooting’s next progession: the crazy eye technique.

  42. avatar Wrightl3 says:

    Say hello to my little friends.

  43. avatar Priest of the center mass says:

    Refer maddness made clem do thangs he shouldn’t outta do but he just needed one more score before he went to rehab……..that was the last anyone heard from clem.

  44. avatar stevor says:

    I got you lefties and righties covered, but I’m giving you folks in the middle a stern look, too!

  45. avatar jwm says:

    Counter rotating tassles caused eye lock for mortimer.

  46. avatar Omer Baker says:

    This is Nancy Pelosi after CCRKBA’s petition succeeded.

  47. avatar jwm says:

    Missed it by this much. Said in Don Adams voice.

  48. avatar Tom D says:

    “I’ll shoot my eyes out, kids.”

  49. avatar Ryan Betty says:

    “I use to be one helluva marksman but this second glass eye is ruining EVERYTHING!!!

  50. avatar bushcrafty says:

    Worst prop ever!

    Somebody get me a real gun.

  51. avatar Daniel H says:

    “Got you surrounded!”

  52. avatar Nam62 says:

    Obama says I’m to old to have real guns!!

  53. avatar George says:

    Damn, I knew I’d screw this up! Righty Tighty, Lefty Losey, oh hell. Can I get another stunt man? I’m pretty sure I killed this one when I shot him with the REAL gun.

  54. avatar tmm says:

    Uncle Joe said shoot both barrels!

  55. avatar Phil LA says:

    The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men…

    1. avatar jwm says:

      Say what one more time…….

  56. avatar Kevin says:

    You’ll shoot your eye out, old man!

  57. avatar Chazbo says:

    One of these is a Mattel Ruff Righter – the loudest cap gun in the world, so you got to ask yourselves,
    “Do I feel lucky today?” – Well do ya punks?

  58. avatar Darkwing says:

    You really pissed me off this time.

  59. avatar jwm says:

    That’s the look one gets when one realizes one has covered everything but one’s six.

  60. avatar Justin Case says:

    Police say they are still on the lookout for “Deadeye Dan” who was last seen brandishing a pair of Glock handguns near the M. Cyrus School for Girls…

  61. avatar S Scott says:

    “Oh Yeah!” (Just where is that barn door?)

  62. avatar eggbone says:

    Elmer Kieth ain’t got nothin on me!

  63. avatar Craig O says:

    Elmer Kieth ain’t got nothin on me!

  64. avatar SF in VA says:

    That’s the last time one of you snot-nosed kids leaves your baseball in my flower bed!

  65. avatar SM says:

    Forget 2 birds with one stone

  66. avatar SM says:

    forget two birds with one stone

  67. avatar tsbhoA.P.jr says:

    “i can smell the worms in your nose. just take half, he says… who’s there? is that my phone?”

  68. avatar Mike says:

    Shoot ’em with swank: Proffer the pinky

  69. avatar George Mogle says:

    Last picture of Bernie Sanders taken seconds after mounting the stage and charging the dais seconds after Hillary Clinton began her acceptance speech as the Democratic candidate for the presidency of the United States

  70. avatar oldandshaky says:

    “.44 Magnum my ass! These ain’t even .9 millimeter.!”

  71. avatar racer88 says:

    Wishing I was wall-eyed like Marty Feldman. Then I could get a sight picture on both guns!

  72. avatar b3nny says:

    This time Bud was ready for for those beady-eyed squirrel bastards. “Those are MY pecans”

    Oh yes, he was ready

  73. avatar Joker says:

    So realistic you tell them apart.

  74. avatar Wanderlust says:

    The 1000 yard cataract

  75. avatar Tyler London says:

    What mall security guards do in their spare time.

  76. avatar Doug says:

    “Didn’t your mama ever teach you not to make fun of a man’s glass eye?”

  77. avatar Newshawk says:

    So who won?

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