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If you didn’t check back to see who won last weekend’s contest – along with a StealthGear USA ONYX IWB holster – RLC2 took the prize. Unfortunately, he entered a bogus email address in the posting process. Consider this fair warning, RLC2: you have until noon tomorrow to contact us or forfeit the prize to another talented smart-ass. And just so no one else tries to scam us out of a free holster, “RLC2” will need to tell us the fake email addy he used to verify his identity, mkay?

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  1. When aging ww2 vets heard the government “Slimdown” was going to adversely affect their benefits they took action, in the only proven way to deal with tyrants.

  2. One good thing about being old is you don’t have to worry about your machine gun rattling your teeth.

  3. “Take that ya little whippersnapper. Shucks, when I was yer age, all we had wuz rimfire, and I could get 500 rounds fer less than two bits. Yer great great grandpappy made me walk 14 miles to the general store fer beans and bullets. It was uphill both a’ways too”

  4. Carl remembering his service in the Wehrmacht decided to pull his last remaining tooth the German Army way. He tied one end of the string to the round, and the other to his tooth. He then shot the round out of his MG 42.

  5. The joy and excitement (and possibly the vibrations through the ground) from the machine gun gave grandma that old feeling she hadn’t felt in decades!

  6. MG42 – $30,000
    10,000 rds of 8mm Ammunition – $7500
    Travel expenses – $500
    Taking the Battle of Athens to a national level 67 years later – Priceless

  7. When the government shutdown caused cancellation of movie night at the Old Soldiers Home in Menlo Park, NJ, 92 year old retired Sergeant Al “Killer” Kowalski took matters into his own hands.

  8. Here, revealed for the first time, we see the devastating effects of the sequester on Seal Team recruiting and training.

  9. Folks at the Fletcher Memorial Retirement Home heard the rumor that because of the government shutdown, Obama had cancelled “Matlock” on TV.

  10. HELLLLLPPPP!!! I’ve fallen and I can’t get…………..ooooohhhhhh,………what’s this?……..pretty…..can I try it?

  11. Ohhhh, don’t be such a wuss. Just go stand over there and hold up that apple. My eyesight is just as good as it ever was.

    • I’m not sure the “poke fun at RF” thing will work two weeks in a row, but still pretty awesome.

      • I promise I only made it in good fun. I just saw the picture and somehow thought of the IDF woman facebook post.

  12. “The denizens of the Sunnybrooke Retirement Home were hellbent on seeing the redwoods of Yosemite one last time before they went to the casino…”

  13. Bye-bye, kiddies! Have fun storming the castle!

    More Princess Bride goofiness:

    There’s a big difference between *all* dead and mostly dead…and I’ve got it right here.

    Humperdinck! Humperdinck! Humperdinck!

    Holocaust cloak? We don’t need to stinking holocaust cloak!

    Oh, you mean this gate key?

  14. “Heh. So, that nice young lady, that Kirsten Joy Weiss, thinks she’s purty fancy shooting Skittles off a pencil. Pshaw! There’s things smaller than Skittles, ya know, like…

    my blood pressure pill. BANG! …

    my cholesterol pill. BANG! …

    my iron pill. BANG! …

    my dementia pill. BANG! …

    my bladder-control pill. BANG!

    Heh heh. My doctor’s kinda on the smallish side, too; hey, why don’t you just stand over there and hold the blood-thinner?

    ‘Sharp shots’ my shillelagh.”

  15. Shit… the old folks home is finally staging a military coup on the rest of us, well time to welcome our elderly overlords with open arms.

  16. Former Royal Fusilier Collin R. ‘Smitty’ Smithington demonstrates the lengths
    to which the U.K. must go, to prevent the return of Piers Morgan to British soil.

  17. I’m Kirsten Weiss… from the FUTURE. In the year 2073, Skittles are much larger and more numerous, and malevolent… we have developed this technology to shoot them!

  18. “Ah rot a hasard.”


    “Ah rot a hasard.”


    *puts dentures back in* “I got that bastard. Let’s get ‘im so we can have dinner.”

  19. So, you guys don’t have money for running the memorials, but, you can operate the drones all over the US and track me to the bathroom. I’ll show you something to spy at. BANG!!!!

  20. The MG42 is the newest treatment approved by the FDA in the treament of both E.D. and depression consult your physician before use.

  21. 1. “Joe Biden told me to!”

    2. Granny Teresa – 2013 Nobel Peace Prize winner.

    3. “Obama said if I liked my stealth wear plan, I can keep my stealth wear plan, so I’m keepin’ it!”

    4. “You can open that WWII Memorial the easy way or the hard way – your choice.”

  22. And as the family car went up in flames.. grandpa had a moment of clarity… that he might have a drinking problem.

  23. Because of his heroic exploits in the Resistance, the other villagers tolerated Michel’s eccentricities. German tourist groups, however, were not so amused.

  24. In an effort to boost profits the Country Kitchen Buffet cancelled their early bird special. Little did they know it would be their last mistake….

  25. What do you mean the war is over? I’ve been sitting in this damn desert a long time waiting for Rommel.

    • PS: I fat finger the dang kindle so badly as is, or the doggone “smart”phone insists on spell-checking even if i have that option turned off- that I really dont know WHAT email I might have used- probly [email protected] as I’ve shortened it to make it easy to log in, once it seemed obvious your posting filter stopped checking email addys.

      Hope the IWB went to someone who needs it- as it is in SoCAL you cant get a CCW unless you are a reserve cop or campaign contributor to the Sheriff, so IWB has no advantage over OWB for now, for the few places you can carry legally- the range, hunting, your campsite on land not otherwise prohibited.

  26. “Get off of my porch….Get off of my property” – Old lady character from Any Which Way But Loose to the biker gang

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