Weekend Photo Caption Contest

If you didn’t check back to see who won last weekend’s contest – along with a StealthGear USA ONYX IWB holster – RLC2 took the prize. Unfortunately, he entered a bogus email address in the posting process. Consider this fair warning, RLC2: you have until noon tomorrow to contact us or forfeit the prize to another talented smart-ass. And just so no one else tries to scam us out of a free holster, “RLC2” will need to tell us the fake email addy he used to verify his identity, mkay?


  1. avatar Matt in FL says:

    Oh, this one oughta be good.

  2. avatar Tyler3923 says:

    In Soviet Russia, grandparent retire you.

    1. avatar Korvis says:

      Dammit. Beat me to it.

  3. avatar dph says:

    You SOBs, I’m telling you for the last time, gimme my teeth back.

    1. avatar Bob says:


      I was going to say that! He beat me to it.

  4. avatar The Eagle says:

    “Stay off mah lawn yah rotten hipsters!”

  5. avatar jwm says:

    When aging ww2 vets heard the government “Slimdown” was going to adversely affect their benefits they took action, in the only proven way to deal with tyrants.

  6. avatar Avid Reader says:

    Grandpa didn’t take the Parkies closing the Memorial very well. . .

  7. avatar Don says:

    One good thing about being old is you don’t have to worry about your machine gun rattling your teeth.

    1. avatar Matt in FL says:

      For sure. I like this one.

    2. avatar Ren says:

      …Or loosing your hearing.

  8. avatar MG83 says:

    “The hell they are closing the WW2 monument”

  9. avatar Roscoe says:

    Oh yea ya, just like tha ol’ days.

    YEA YA!

    This is bloody great, laddie!

  10. avatar Damocles says:

    “Take that ya little whippersnapper. Shucks, when I was yer age, all we had wuz rimfire, and I could get 500 rounds fer less than two bits. Yer great great grandpappy made me walk 14 miles to the general store fer beans and bullets. It was uphill both a’ways too”

  11. avatar Jim Lavin says:

    Carl remembering his service in the Wehrmacht decided to pull his last remaining tooth the German Army way. He tied one end of the string to the round, and the other to his tooth. He then shot the round out of his MG 42.

  12. avatar Mike123 says:

    Obamacare Death Panels …. I’ll show you Death Panels.

  13. avatar Kvjavs says:

    Ra-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta! Ra-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta!

  14. avatar Don says:

    “grandma! can we see your machine guns?”

    “what’s that, ma clean gums?”

  15. avatar MG83 says:

    Deer season has gotten drastic since grandpa’s eyesight started going..

    1. avatar Matt in FL says:

      Well done.

  16. avatar Morseus says:

    I’m here to kick ass and chew bubblegum. And I’m all out of teeth.

    1. avatar Kelly in GA says:

      I LOL’d

  17. avatar Denny says:

    Papa says come here. NOW!

  18. avatar Don says:

    The joy and excitement (and possibly the vibrations through the ground) from the machine gun gave grandma that old feeling she hadn’t felt in decades!

  19. avatar Jay1987 says:

    What’s that you say sonny?? I can’t hear you over the sound of ol’ Gertrude here.

  20. avatar NYC2AZ says:

    MG42 – $30,000
    10,000 rds of 8mm Ammunition – $7500
    Travel expenses – $500
    Taking the Battle of Athens to a national level 67 years later – Priceless

  21. avatar Ralph says:

    Meet the real Ma Deuce.

    1. avatar NevadaSmith says:

      Ralph, you win. Ma Deuce has me laughing so hard…

  22. avatar Louis says:

    Go get this, go get that. Woman, catch this – Bang

  23. avatar Joel says:

    When the government shutdown caused cancellation of movie night at the Old Soldiers Home in Menlo Park, NJ, 92 year old retired Sergeant Al “Killer” Kowalski took matters into his own hands.

  24. avatar Joel says:

    Here, revealed for the first time, we see the devastating effects of the sequester on Seal Team recruiting and training.

    1. avatar Vendetta says:


  25. avatar Dan says:

    For the last time… NO MORE ENAMAS !!!

  26. avatar Sam Wright says:

    Folks at the Fletcher Memorial Retirement Home heard the rumor that because of the government shutdown, Obama had cancelled “Matlock” on TV.

  27. avatar Joel says:

    HELLLLLPPPP!!! I’ve fallen and I can’t get…………..ooooohhhhhh,………what’s this?……..pretty…..can I try it?

  28. avatar Jeh says:

    Denie me my Medicare now you whipper snappers!

  29. avatar Joel says:

    Look what my grandson sent me for my birthday. Ain’t it purty?

  30. avatar Joel says:

    Ohhhh, don’t be such a wuss. Just go stand over there and hold up that apple. My eyesight is just as good as it ever was.

  31. avatar coevorden says:

    Even in his twilight years RF never lost his love for the now Senior Woman of the IDF.

    1. avatar Matt in FL says:

      I’m not sure the “poke fun at RF” thing will work two weeks in a row, but still pretty awesome.

      1. avatar coevorden says:

        I promise I only made it in good fun. I just saw the picture and somehow thought of the IDF woman facebook post.

  32. avatar Joel says:

    Back taxes my wrinkly old ass! You just turn right around sonny and skeedaddle.

  33. avatar Marcus says:

    “The denizens of the Sunnybrooke Retirement Home were hellbent on seeing the redwoods of Yosemite one last time before they went to the casino…”

  34. avatar Ing says:

    Bye-bye, kiddies! Have fun storming the castle!

    More Princess Bride goofiness:

    There’s a big difference between *all* dead and mostly dead…and I’ve got it right here.

    Humperdinck! Humperdinck! Humperdinck!

    Holocaust cloak? We don’t need to stinking holocaust cloak!

    Oh, you mean this gate key?

  35. avatar Paul53 says:

    Ah need a latrine break…………………never mind!

  36. avatar Damocles says:

    “Let me show you how to hunt RHINOs back when Lincoln was President!”

  37. avatar Paul53 says:

    WHEELCHAIRS! Toss a granny grenade!

  38. avatar Paul53 says:

    You want my Medicare card? Come and take it!

  39. avatar Phil in NYC says:

    “Heh. So, that nice young lady, that Kirsten Joy Weiss, thinks she’s purty fancy shooting Skittles off a pencil. Pshaw! There’s things smaller than Skittles, ya know, like…

    my blood pressure pill. BANG! …

    my cholesterol pill. BANG! …

    my iron pill. BANG! …

    my dementia pill. BANG! …

    my bladder-control pill. BANG!

    Heh heh. My doctor’s kinda on the smallish side, too; hey, why don’t you just stand over there and hold the blood-thinner?

    ‘Sharp shots’ my shillelagh.”

  40. avatar Jay1987 says:

    Shit… the old folks home is finally staging a military coup on the rest of us, well time to welcome our elderly overlords with open arms.

  41. avatar 505markf says:

    “Open wide and say, ‘Ahhh!'”

  42. avatar Mark N. says:

    Jes’ ’cause I ain’t got no teeth don’t mean I’m toothless!

  43. avatar Brian says:

    Maybe casting Alec Baldwin in the third remake of Red Dawn wasn’t such a great idea after all…

  44. avatar Out_Fang_Thief says:

    Former Royal Fusilier Collin R. ‘Smitty’ Smithington demonstrates the lengths
    to which the U.K. must go, to prevent the return of Piers Morgan to British soil.

  45. avatar Jacob Bang Bang says:

    Papas got a brand new bang

  46. avatar shawn says:

    “I have put bigger things in my mouth.”
    “Once you go no teeth, you never go back.”

  47. avatar Don says:

    I’m Kirsten Weiss… from the FUTURE. In the year 2073, Skittles are much larger and more numerous, and malevolent… we have developed this technology to shoot them!

  48. avatar jwm says:

    “Say hello to my little friend.”

  49. avatar Scoolbubba says:

    I told you not to cut medicare.

  50. avatar Joel says:

    Go ahead, tell me again about how you’re going to put me in a home whether I like it or not.

  51. avatar Kelly in GA says:

    “Ah rot a hasard.”


    “Ah rot a hasard.”


    *puts dentures back in* “I got that bastard. Let’s get ‘im so we can have dinner.”

  52. avatar Joel says:

    Feeling lucky? Well, are ya, punk?

  53. avatar A-Rod says:

    “F… U… Obammmmmaaaaa!!” bangbangbangbang

  54. avatar Crunkleross says:

    Aye, give me a sec boys I’m laying on me left testicle.

  55. avatar Joel says:

    Poor old John Boehner, the 97th. vote to repeal Obamacare finally drove him over the edge.

  56. avatar Piet Padkos says:

    “Are those negros I see?” No offense, he looks like a shaved confederate

  57. avatar Model 31 says:

    and then Mable said “Yea, I got my FOID card right here!”

  58. avatar Nick says:

    Taking away the Vodka and potato rations was a mistake

  59. avatar Nick says:

    Dinners ready!!!!! Shoots ceremonial triangle gun for all to hear

  60. avatar Wheelsucker says:

    Get sum!

  61. avatar Hannibal says:

    Dang kids, get off mah lawn!

  62. avatar Liberty2Alpha says:

    “No one needs 30 rounds to hunt deer.”

    “Okay, maybe *he* does; but no one else…”

  63. avatar Bryan says:

    Ethel’s doin’ her part to take the Bingo Hall back from the Indian Casinos!

  64. avatar jirdesteva says:

    So, you guys don’t have money for running the memorials, but, you can operate the drones all over the US and track me to the bathroom. I’ll show you something to spy at. BANG!!!!

  65. avatar JonB says:

    Welcome to Florida….. Bitches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  66. avatar Kelly in GA says:

    Hey, Token, Cartman ain’t got sh!t on this!!!

  67. avatar James1000 says:

    I told you, nursing homes are for pu$$ies…

  68. avatar Jay1987 says:

    The MG42 is the newest treatment approved by the FDA in the treament of both E.D. and depression consult your physician before use.

  69. avatar watchmenlewis says:

    Wolverines!!!! Surprise! Gotta good F**ker

  70. avatar Tom says:

    My hands are getting cold…and dead.

  71. avatar RockThisTown says:

    1. “Joe Biden told me to!”

    2. Granny Teresa – 2013 Nobel Peace Prize winner.

    3. “Obama said if I liked my stealth wear plan, I can keep my stealth wear plan, so I’m keepin’ it!”

    4. “You can open that WWII Memorial the easy way or the hard way – your choice.”

  72. avatar Rob says:

    From my cold dead hands!

  73. avatar Rodeo Jones says:

    And as the family car went up in flames.. grandpa had a moment of clarity… that he might have a drinking problem.

  74. avatar Eric L says:

    After looking at the pic, all I have is Benny Hill’s theme song playing in my head

  75. avatar Fuzzy says:

    I’ll lay down suppressing fire over the adult diapers aisle, you go grab the Prep-H.

  76. avatar LOLFactorofPi says:

    My preciousssss!!!!!!

  77. avatar Not So 1337 says:

    A member of the AARP practices a new form of lobbying set to hit Capitol Hill this year.

  78. avatar Taro Tsujimoto says:

    Because of his heroic exploits in the Resistance, the other villagers tolerated Michel’s eccentricities. German tourist groups, however, were not so amused.

  79. avatar NWGlocker says:

    Eating yogurt never seemed to work for Pavel. This did.

  80. avatar Tom B. says:

    I told you you couldn’t borrow my teeth!

  81. avatar Joey S says:

    Ahhh motha land!

  82. avatar Brian says:

    After that deer totaled his car, grandpa took deer hunting to a whole new level

  83. avatar Peirsonb says:

    In an effort to boost profits the Country Kitchen Buffet cancelled their early bird special. Little did they know it would be their last mistake….

  84. avatar Culpeper Kid says:

    You sure if I open my mouth, I won’t need muffs?

  85. avatar DanRRZ says:

    Geriatric Shooting- no need for ‘ears’ when yours simply turn off at the push of a button

  86. avatar sagebrushracer says:

    “Come and take it! Ya bastards!”

  87. avatar JAS says:

    Grampa’s reaction when told it was time for another colonoscopy……

  88. avatar Soccerchainsaw says:

    “Oh my, I only meant to wing that revenuer, not blow his head off.”

  89. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    What’d ya mean the war ended? What?

  90. avatar Paul53 says:

    The Old Guard is still ready if “The Japs” try to invade Daytona Beach!

  91. avatar Gregolas says:

    After they got her hubcaps, grandma declared war.

  92. avatar Mark says:

    What do you mean the war is over? I’ve been sitting in this damn desert a long time waiting for Rommel.

  93. avatar JaredFromTampa says:

    The Sith memes seem to have finally pushed Pope Emeritus Ratzinger over the edge.

  94. avatar Mack Bolan says:

    Which one of you batthtards toot my teef!!!

  95. avatar RLC2 says:

    Diane Feinstein respondes to Ted Cruz in Senate gun control debate, 2020.

    1. avatar RLC2 says:

      PS: I fat finger the dang kindle so badly as is, or the doggone “smart”phone insists on spell-checking even if i have that option turned off- that I really dont know WHAT email I might have used- probly [email protected] as I’ve shortened it to make it easy to log in, once it seemed obvious your posting filter stopped checking email addys.

      Hope the IWB went to someone who needs it- as it is in SoCAL you cant get a CCW unless you are a reserve cop or campaign contributor to the Sheriff, so IWB has no advantage over OWB for now, for the few places you can carry legally- the range, hunting, your campsite on land not otherwise prohibited.

  96. avatar jcg101 says:

    Just put your change in the cup and no one gets hurt.

  97. avatar jcamp says:

    Pacemaker? I thought you said “Peacemaker”!?

  98. avatar cholentPot says:

    Grandpa’s got a brand new bang.

  99. avatar Don says:

    Death Wish 6, starring Ron Paul!

  100. avatar DanRRZ says:

    Caddyshack XIII- With a Vengeance

  101. avatar johnmackay70 says:

    “Get off of my porch….Get off of my property” – Old lady character from Any Which Way But Loose to the biker gang

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