Weekend Photo Caption Contest – Win a Boxer Tactical Key Whip


Enter the best caption in the comments by Sunday midnight and win a wonderfully over-engineered Boxer Tactical Key Whip.


  1. avatar Saul Aulinsilki says:

    You must stop iPhone pop ups!

    1. avatar Omer Baker says:


      1. avatar Marcus (Aurelius) Payne says:

        That’s not his caption?

  2. avatar jwm says:

    Hold real still, honey. There’s a fly on your hair.

  3. avatar SpeleoFool says:

    Thank you choosing Tactical Response for your training needs. Now, I’m going to show you the importance of following Cooper’s 4 rules….

  4. avatar Sasquatch says:

    Want to flick my bic?

  5. avatar Chris says:

    “Now you listen here. If you think my SUIT is loud…!”

  6. avatar jwm says:

    “Seeing as how your pistol has Replica written on it’s side and mine says Desert Eagle point Fivo Oh………….”

    1. avatar Rambo Shopper says:

      … it should precipitate your balls into shrinking, and you along with their presence.

  7. avatar SD3 says:

    See this?!? It’s what we call “trigger discipline”.

  8. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    “You tell anyone I’m bald, I’ll shoot you and rape your dog”

  9. avatar jwm says:

    What, open carry scares you?

  10. avatar Anonymous says:

    Did you guys buy some key whips that turned out to not be to your liking?


    1. avatar jwm says:

      They been ba-ad boys. Next they’ll be giving away village people videos.

  11. avatar Marty the Lett says:

    OK Sophia- Just go down on the pepperoni..

  12. avatar ActionPhysicalMan says:

    You know what they say about men with tiny guns.

    1. avatar Geoff PR says:

      Big hands?


  13. avatar Marc B says:

    Does this gun make my hands look small?

  14. avatar Rollbutt says:

    “Roses are red, violets are green, my cylinder revolver goes around like a washing machine”.

  15. avatar Removed_californian says:

    I may have inadvertently made a key whip when I made a lanyard out of paracord and put a larue Dillo at the end of it.

    The biggest issue I’ve faced is the little key ring on mine beginning to stretch open through repeated swings.

    I question the effectiveness of a “key whip” but hey, whatever helps sell your lanyard.

    1. avatar pdg says:

      Key Whip Execution

  16. avatar Dr Brainwash says:

    Now, you best start voting Democrat, if you know what’s good for you.

  17. avatar Vhyrus says:

    Don’t be scared, honey… the big one is still holstered.

  18. avatar LongPurple says:

    You call me “Lefty” again, I shoot-a you face!

  19. avatar Steve in TX says:

    Another Trump tweet.

  20. avatar Rambo Shopper says:

    Relax baby, I’m a registered sperm donor.

  21. avatar stevor says:

    what do you mean that you replaced my bullets with blanks?

  22. avatar Rusty Chains says:

    Damn it, stop making fun of my stupid, I mean stop with the stupid hat jokes!

  23. avatar Sofa King says:

    “If you’ll be good to me, then i’ll be good to you, and we’ll both ride home in my automobile.. 😉

  24. avatar oldandshaky says:

    “Notice, my dear, how I am undercompensating in comparison to my, ahem, other gun. I promise. Capisce?”

  25. avatar Alan Esworthy says:

    Hey, Camp Fire Girl! It’s Marcello…MARCELLO! Stop with the Marshmallow jokes!

  26. avatar Watts' Twat says:

    A “snubby”? I thought you were packing MORE than THAT, now take me home.

  27. avatar Phil LA says:


  28. avatar Wrightl3 says:

    Tom Selleck disagrees with his wife.

  29. avatar Jimmyjames says:

    Make-a some manicotti and nobody gets-a hurt.

  30. avatar ActionPhysicalMan says:

    This is an .11 anemic, the least effective handgun in the world….

    1. avatar jwm says:

      No, that title goes to the .9mm. CALIBER WARS, MOFO! 🙂

    2. avatar Chris says:

      lmao. Got my vote

  31. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    Nice hat. I bet you get a free bowl of soup with that.

  32. avatar billy-bob says:

    “This is a .9mm the most power…, no wait”

  33. avatar James69 says:

    For the last time, WE ARE NOT STOPPING AT ULTA!!!!!!!!

  34. avatar jwm says:

    Go ahead. Do 99 bottles of beer one more time. I dare you.

  35. avatar tmm says:

    I told you…LEAVE the gun…take the CANNOLI

  36. avatar Gregolas says:

    You put my Model 29 in the dryer and shrunk it !

  37. avatar mike oregon says:

    Dear, why is your booger hook on the bang switch, sweetie.

  38. avatar Rick K says:

    One more comment about my porno ‘stash or mutton chops and I’ll fill you fulla lead.

  39. avatar Andrew Lias says:

    See?! I’ll put my finger on the trigger if I want to see!?

  40. avatar Ing says:

    Oh, so you wanted to see my OTHER snubby, eh?

  41. avatar Steve in MA (now RI) says:

    “I thought you were just happy to see me.”

  42. avatar Paul53 says:

    Donald Trumps first date. “I really know how to treat a woman. All the women love me!”

  43. avatar Fishhead says:

    Last week the milkman.now this!!! Who’s gun is this?

  44. avatar tsbhoA.P.jr says:

    “you call that a windsor?”

  45. avatar Matt says:

    “For the last time… I’m not shaving my sideburns off!”.

  46. avatar Jasonius says:

    Just one more holdup and we’ll finally have enough cash to start that little pizza place we’ve always wanted. We’ll call it Rocky Rococco.

  47. avatar Larry says:

    Leave your keys in your pocket and put a heavy padlock on the whip and you might have something.

  48. avatar Cmack says:

    Say “YOLO” one more time! I dare ya.

  49. avatar jwm says:

    For every drop dead gorgeous woman in the world there is a man that is tired of putting up with her shit.

    Meet Mr. Tired.

  50. avatar Matt in Oklahoma says:

    I said Miracle Whip!

  51. avatar Mudshark says:

    I tryed the suicide prevention hot line, they put me on hold.

  52. avatar pieslapper says:

    “No! 50 lira for around the world, it’sa too much! “

  53. avatar Michael says:

    “Gun discipline, I don’t need any gun discipline!”

  54. avatar Watts' Twat says:

    “Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know I told you it was ‘hard as steel’ but don’t blame me because I didn’t tell you ‘it’ was ‘black’ and by the way recoiling in horror proves you’re ‘racist'”

  55. avatar AaronW says:

    “For the last time… I DO NOT know Roberto Begnini!”

  56. avatar Travis Patocka says:

    And this, my dear, is the starter pistol you will use in today’s track meet.

  57. avatar jwm says:

    Due to a childhood trauma Ralphie developed into an adult with an unheathy obsession with guns and eyes.

  58. avatar Kim S says:

    But, but……Cosmo says,

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