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  1. Looks like one of those “punt guns” that were prevalent on the Chesapeake Bay back in the day. Professional hunters could slide up to a flock of water birds (of which there were and still are many) and cut loose with this thing to take the whole flock at one go. Or so the older timers claimed. Illegal nowadays, of course.

  2. “Is that a breech-loading swivel-mounted punt gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?”

  3. Hey honey look at this! It says, “Previously owned by Andre Rene Roussimoff who carried it as a concealed weapon for self defense until the day he died, January 27 1993.”

    • Whoa — Andre the Giant reference FTW!

      I drank with him a couple of times at an Argentine restaurant in NYC not far from Madison Square Garden. One of the other wrestlers (who was unpredictable, wink wink) was a friend of mine at the time. Don’t ask me about those episodes because I remember exactly nothing. Damn, the big guy could really drink.

  4. North American Arms, maker of the tiny mini revolvers, decides to expand their line a bit.

  5. 1. Assume every stairwell is loaded until you check it yourself
    2. Never take stairs that lead somewhere you’re unwilling to travel
    3. Keep your fingers off of the railing until you’re ready to walk!
    4. Know your hallway and what’s beyond it

  6. Bad news? You only got one shot. Good news? It’ll take out an area roughly the size of Rhode Island.

  7. New dual purpose gun. Shoots 22 short, or 20 MM cannon shell
    Mice to mammoths.

    P.S. And anything in between!

  8. World’s first and only tampon launcher! “Hell I could plug Betty at 300 yards with this”

  9. “Honey, yours is so small compared to this one. Wish I would have known that before we got married.”

  10. “…never worry bout a thing, got the world on a string, cause I’ve got the cure for all of my blues…. I take a look at my enormous punt gun, and my troubles start a melting away”

    • “You shouldn’t hang me on a hook, Johnny. My father hung me on a hook once… Once!”

      And who could forget – ” You shouldn’t kick me in the balls, Mrs. Kelly. My sister kicked me in the balls once…”
      [Stumbles in pain]

      – from Johnny Dangerously (1984)

  11. This is not a caption. I’m just confused.
    Where is her other hand? She best not be strokin the trigger!

  12. Dad sits in the living room cleaning this when a guy comes to take me out. I don’t understand why I’ve never been asked out on a second date.

  13. Is that your punt gun or are just you happy to see me? I just had to touch it to make sure.

  14. The plaque says that it is a punt gun. I’ve never seen anything like this used in a football game. Men are just beyond all understanding. This makes no sense at all. I’m going shopping.

  15. “Mary claims her new thigh holster won’t print no matter how large of a gun she carries”

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