Weekend Photo Caption Contest



  1. avatar Mike Crognale says:

    Short arm part of the gear check.

  2. avatar Tom says:

    Is this photoshopped or is this the German army in 1945?

    1. avatar TheOtherDavid says:

      in reality I think they’ve gotten to the “ford every stream” part of “Climb Every Mountain,” I wouldn’t want to march in soaked wool especially in those boots.

  3. avatar TheOtherDavid says:

    Fighting in the Boxer Rebellion, perhaps?

    Hoping for a brief gun battle?

    “Removing the soaked trousers was the SECOND thing that these German soldiers did on seeing the approaching Allied armada…”

  4. avatar Gurney Halleck says:

    Long before “Don’t ask,don’t tell”.

  5. avatar Randy in Indiana says:

    Combat loads are all about priorities, boys.

  6. avatar DrVino says:

    The German variation on the “Elephant Walk”

  7. avatar jay1987 says:


  8. avatar Mack Bolan says:

    Always the model of German efficiency, this group of soldiers has de-pantsed in preparation to use the latrine.

  9. avatar Rob1285 says:

    Guys, I’ve a great idea…its called high speed, low drag…

  10. avatar Daily Beatings says:

    Where are the battalion’s trousers? Hogan!!!

    1. avatar Felix says:

      I don’t understand. That makes no sense. What is the cultural reference I am missing?


      1. avatar Tietonian says:

        …nothing, nothing…
        I don’t know if you were being sarcastic, but I think you’ve got it just fine. 😀

  11. avatar JaxD says:

    Not the last time the Germans were caught with their pants down.

  12. avatar BDub says:

    Sorry folks!! Casting for Ziegfeld’s List is now closed. Thank you for coming.

  13. avatar Aaronw says:

    “Well sling your Mausers and drop your trousers… We’re goin’ to war!!”

    1. avatar Toby in KS says:


  14. avatar Accur81 says:

    Sometimes soldiers just make an ass of themselves.

  15. avatar DaveM says:

    Staging area for LGBT parade
    Add letters as you see fit

  16. avatar Marcus Aurelius says:

    The soldiers were excited to get their new kilts, made from the same material as the Emperor’s new outfit.

  17. avatar Stinkeye says:

    Troops assembling for BVD-Day, 1944.

  18. avatar Aaronw says:

    The field expedient way to deal with E. coli infected rations.

  19. avatar SpeleoFool says:

    Hammer Squad reassembles after completing an air-drop using parachute pants.

  20. avatar Dave says:

    Another Casual Friday in the German army…

  21. avatar London says:

    Now just bend over and wait for the Americans to arrive!

  22. avatar Bob on Washington says:

    Us Germans don’t wear no stinkin’ kilts.

  23. avatar tripster says:

    Have gun, will travel
    Have pants, who cares?

    Military test 10045. Shrinkage, myth or fact?

  24. avatar rhampton says:

    Close quarters weapons drill

  25. avatar maynard b says:

    Another day at the proving grounds, where the OPFOR group didn’t have a chance when put up against the new generation of Pantsers.

  26. avatar jay1987 says:

    you know in all seriousness that looks like a great way to get a cheap & easy vasectomy

  27. avatar Schufly says:

    OK……now we find out who really stole the soap.

  28. avatar JaxD says:

    I hear the beach in Stalingrad is fabulous this time of year. I’m sure we’ll be back before it gets cold.

  29. avatar ErrantVenture11 says:

    Eager young members of the Wehrmacht line up for a shot at stardom in Debbie Does Dresden.

    1. avatar Marcus Aurelius says:

      HA! This gets my vote.

      Too bad that film bombed.

  30. avatar Marc says:

    Tactical pants optional.

  31. avatar Tim says:

    Alright men, the good news: you get to change your pants. Bad news: you change with him, you change with him, you change…

  32. avatar Dave in WI says:

    You have the right to bare (bear) arms, too.

  33. avatar Lance Sauer says:

    Pants of dance off the new road to peace

  34. avatar Bigred2989 says:

    Part of Hugo Boss’ contract with the SS stipulated that soldiers were required to wear the top at all times so as to allow them to constantly show off their brand.

  35. avatar Nine says:

    “Just over this ridge boys and we’ll catch the Jerries with their pants down!”

    1. avatar the ruester says:


  36. avatar SigGuy says:

    They just blitzkrieged their pants.

  37. avatar Another Robert says:

    The company had learned from experience how to prepare for a 3-hour pass…

  38. avatar Scholarcat says:

    They conquered Paris, conquered France, now we see their underpants.

  39. avatar Pashtun6 says:

    On a more serious note it does look like they are about to cross a stream

  40. avatar Paul53 says:

    History would forget that “SS” stood for “short shorts.”

  41. avatar 505markf says:

    Anticipating a hopeful welcoming by French girls, select units of the Wehrmacht’s 352nd division prepare to enter Paris.

    1. avatar Paul53 says:

      No way dude, she wasn’t even born then!

  42. avatar Paul53 says:

    Convinced that his men were superior in every way, Hitler decided he would shame the British into surrender.

    1. avatar William Burke says:

      Yet he and the Brits both shared the shame with the French.

  43. avatar Dave Lewis says:

    We’ll just hang loose for a minute while we figure out what all those ships are doing out there in the Channel….

  44. avatar Gregolas says:

    “Vere iss der Justice? Der Fuerher iss der liar, und OUR pantzen catchen fire!”

  45. avatar William Burke says:


    Sorry, but you will NEVER live that one down as long as I’m around.

  46. avatar Gov. William J. Le Petomane says:

    Hitler was so sure the Russians would be defeated before the brutal Russian winter set in that he sent his troops into battle without winter clothing. Many of the Germans troops were not even equipped with pants.

  47. avatar RockThisTown says:

    Sgt. Yul Bendova prepares the squad for battle.

  48. avatar usriflecaliber.30m1 says:

    The Blitz was so fast, some and there pants couldn’t keep up.

  49. avatar Spitfire says:

    The German army if Hitler came out of the closet

  50. avatar Paul53 says:

    One simple error on the part of the clerk ordering uniforms, and everybody’s angry.

  51. avatar Paul53 says:

    Everyone stay in time with the music now. “Tip toe, through the tulips…..”

  52. avatar Mirgc says:

    The last time the infantry made fun of the quartermaster.

  53. avatar Clark99 says:

    OK, men, you can’t have both! You either give us your rifle or your pants, your choice!

  54. avatar Kim Smith says:

    Obama’s civilian military marches to war.

  55. avatar Former Water Walker says:

    Dick Shawn checking out his dancers in “Springtime For Hitler”.

  56. avatar Logan says:

    Assualt pants not allowed

  57. avatar neiowa says:

    Won’t need the boat leave it at the kaserne you said. Your cousin Hans in the Kriegsmarine will get us to England you said. Or your sister Bertha the Lufthansa flightfrau will get us on a plane you said.

    Now that dumbass Hilter wants us to walk across the Channel

  58. avatar S. Cautela says:

    It looks like they’re getting ready for an Ernst Rohm “junk on the bunk” inspection.

  59. avatar Eric L says:

    Nazi swim team?

  60. avatar Heretical Politik says:

    “And we’ll have FUN FUN FUN till Hitler takes our Tiger away-e-ay!”

  61. avatar S. Cautela says:

    After having watched the famous kilt flashing scene at the Battle of Stirling Bridge in the film Braveheart. Hitler ordered an entire division to drop their trousers at the Pas-de-Calais within eyeshot of the British coast.

  62. avatar The Brotherhood of Steel says:

    Maybe if we make our legs real pretty looking for the Russians, they’ll show mercy on us…..

  63. avatar dh34 says:

    Open auditions for Lili Von Shtupp’s troupe.

  64. avatar Rebecca says:

    Well boys, you all went out and had a good time and now you all have the hot silver wire treatment coming. Who’s first?

  65. avatar Taylor TX says:

    Time to get in the Pantzer! jawohl!

  66. avatar Matt G says:

    Drop your cocks and grab your socks

  67. avatar JAS says:

    Frank Costanza cooked the chow, which led to a run on the latrines, which led to a long wait line. The men had no choice. They were forced to don their pants because many could not make it!


    1. avatar Russ Bixby says:

      I doff my hat trousers to you…

  68. avatar Phil says:

    There it is; the reason I’ve never joined the military. After my first engagement, I’d probably have to change pants too. Pretty soon I’d be out of pants.

  69. avatar Russ Bixby says:

    Eine Stunde Reinigung, meinen Arsch!!

  70. avatar John in AK says:

    Eagerly anticipating their first night in Paris, the III Korps’ crack Can-Can Team rehearses for their debut performance at the Folies Bergere.

  71. avatar somemook says:

    Fortunately for the Allies, the Germans never fully implemented their Neinhosen Shock Troops.

  72. avatar Lucas D. says:

    Look, fellas, I don’t know what your deal is, but if you promise not to tell I promise not to ask.

  73. avatar Ken kaniff says:

    This is your “caption if the day”? I didn’t see one 70th anniversary of d-day post today. Had a lot if other bs posts, but not one on dday. What a disgrace.

    1. avatar Gregolas says:

      What’s wrong with making fun of Krauts on the D-Day anniversary? Don’t know in bars all over America that day, people were singing, “Der Feurher’s Face”?

  74. avatar Pat says:

    Auditioning for a part in “The Producers”. “Springtime…for Hitler…in Germany”.

  75. avatar Great Scot says:

    The German army’s bladders were no match for the ferocity of the Allied forces.

  76. avatar KissMyWookiee says:

    Due to the French playing possum at the sight of a rifle, the capture of France was more of a barefoot stroll in the country for these Jerrys.

  77. avatar Mike P. says:

    The German officers crossed the Rhine, Parlez Vous
    The German officers crossed the Rhine, Parlez Vous

    etc. etc.

  78. avatar Josh says:

    Zee Americans said they’re going to beat the pants off of us, joke’s on them…

  79. avatar Beanz says:

    We don’t even need pants when we go to war with France!

  80. avatar Dave says:

    Wrong line! Panzer Bridage line is to the left… this is the De-Panzer Brigade

  81. avatar Mike says:

    Ummm, this was last Friday at Max Mosely’s BBQ.

  82. avatar Fuzzy says:

    It took some experimenting before the German Pantzer units were ready for action.

  83. avatar Jeff says:

    The SS Depantser Division prepares for battle!

  84. avatar Mchad says:

    No seriously, this is what ALL Operators are doing theses days, I saw it on James Yeagers last YouTube vid!

  85. avatar Marcus says:

    Oh man. I can’t help but be reminded of 4 particular friends of mine. They are in the National Guard, and man a Stryker and the big ass mortar tube so lovingly affixed to it. They are “The pantsless mortar crew of Bravo Company” Every time they go away to drill, they return with videos of themselves and the other guys in full gear, minus pants of course, raining down 120mm HE rounds as fast as they can.

    It’s pretty funny seeing how intense and into it they get, and then the camera pans down and you see they are doing it without pants on. It may be a bit juvenile, but you can’t help but crack a smile when you see it.

  86. Hitler’s promise to Poland was kept…technically. “There will be no boots on the ground.”

  87. avatar engineear says:

    Non-wedgie undies.

  88. avatar SailorBobs says:

    Sequestration in all it’s glory.

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