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LOL, I love this. The whole concept around a specific FBI agent being assigned to you is hilarious. I hope mine likes memes.


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  1. I’ve worked with a few FBI agents. I found them to be professional, with a dry since of humor. I mostly liked them. I will say that they tended to look down their noses at you until they understood that you knew what you were talking about. And they didn’t. Somethings that took a minute.

    • If they ate my fruit basket you wouldn’t have to worry about making peace.
      The UEPFNB is just a subterfuge. Once perfected-( already have, just cant let .gov know)- all I have to do is spit in the ocean and all human life forms will cease to exist. theBiden is hoping I have it perfected before 2035. That’s the year they jump start his brain with an electric car. Hes confided in me that once his brain is reconstituted he might start thinking clearly and commit suicide. He’d rather I annihilate humankind before that happens.
      BTW there Joe, Have you met LaWanda?
      , she pimps out her granddaughter, going on 11 years old, just your type.
      Nah,,,the more I think about it the UniverseEndingPerpetualFussionNuetrinoBlomb makes more sense. Vaporizing the vapor perpetually. No space to nuke them from, the eater of worm holes and string theories, destroyer of the 6th dimension.
      I had a dream
      There were clouds in my coffee
      Clouds in my coffee —
      (I wonder what the elf bee eye thinks of that sht?^,,,,I know they monitor gunm sites.)

  2. I wonder if my assigned agent gets to keep his air miles? I have over 130 flown segments this year. Hope he gets hotel points too. Those have added up. I used hotel points for Bass Pro cards and bought a firearm, I wonder if he was watching me swiping those $25 gift cards at the register for that firearm?

  3. Hey daican, a video entitled “How to drill a 3rd hole” is probably a good title for that porn movie you and your mom want to make.


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