“I was awakened with a gun in my face hollering ‘give me all yo money and give me all yo jewelry’ and I screamed ‘I don’t have any money and I don’t have any jewelry.'” As wafb.com reports, “That didn’t satisfy [him]. Then he asked me about everyone in my house during this time I’m fumbling to get my gun. He pushed me down. I got up fought back.” Turns out the gun the goon was holding was an air rifle. Not that the victim (who prefers to remain nameless) knew. “[I] kept on fighting and another person in the house got up to see what the dogs were barking at and that distracted him. When that distracted him I finally got to my pistol and fired a round,” the victim said. “He felt like it was going to be easy especially when he saw me on oxygen and a woman. I can take her down. Sorry.” [/sarcasm]