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The Biggest Crime of them all: FAKE UK Police Crime Statistics

Dr. Paul Gallant and Dr. Joanne D. Eisen write (courtesy

The UK has been at the vanguard of international efforts to secure an Arms Trade Treaty in the United Nations since co-authoring the original UN Resolution in 2006. Under former foreign secretary Jack Straw, the UK pressed for a “strong” treaty which equated human rights with weapons control. Yet the combination of total government control of handgun ownership, combined with the hands-off treatment of criminals has backfired. It must be embarrassing for British firearm-prohibitionists to see their philosophy failing in their own backyard, especially in view of their intense desire to export that philosophy to other nations around the globe . . .

We believe that the proponents of a gun-free society have developed a fear of hearing the truth, or alethephobia. In order to compensate for this common condition that plagues humanity, they have gone to great lengths, even to the extent of paying bonuses to their senior officers. Ann T. Hathaway, a blogger in the UK whose interest is a variety of topics, reported that officers are discouraged from detecting [solving] crimes during the last quarter of the year because senior officers are depending on their bonuses.

She references Inspector Gadget who specifically states;

“They must not, under any circumstances, get out on the street and find any more crime. Not until the next financial year anyway….”

Hathaway goes on to say: “Now attach the idea of bonuses to this. The fakery becomes cash fraud.”

This fact was acknowledged by the Daily Mail in March, 2011. They reported on a scheme which has enabled most Chief Constables to collect five-figure bonuses of 15% on top of their salaries.” In June, 2013, the Daily Mail further reported that one Chief Constable was paid a “24,000 pound ‘honorarium’ for cutting crime.”

The December 5, 2009 edition of the UK Telegraph described some of the “tricks” used by the police to “fiddle” crime statistics. These were uncovered by retired Detective Chief Inspector Dr. Rodger Patrick. Patrick did the research in the course of obtaining his PhD degree. On the basis of Patrick’s research, The Telegraph described techniques called “cuffing,” “stitching,” “skewing,” and “nodding.”

Home Secretary Theresa May has dodged questions on police numbers while Police Minister Nick Herbert has said personnel numbers are not the best measure of success against crime.

Home Secretary Theresa May has dodged questions on police numbers while Police Minister Nick Herbert has said numbers are not the best measure of success against crime.

Patrick stated: “The academics call this ‘gaming’ but police officers would call it fiddling the figures, massaging the books or, the current favourite term, ‘good housekeeping’. It is a bit like the police activities that we all thought stopped in the 1970s.”

According to The Telegraph, “In one case, an offender shot at another man at close range but missed and broke a window behind his target. The offense was recorded as criminal damage rather than attempted murder.”

The article further quotes Simon Reed, vice-chairman of the Police Federation, which represents front line officers:

“This research demonstrates that senior officers are directing and controlling widespread manipulation of crime figures. The public are misled, politicians can claim crime is falling and chief officers are rewarded with performance-related bonuses.”

These “targets,” or performance goals, come straight from the Home Office. In July, 2008, then-Home Secretary, Jacqui Smith, said that targets would be eliminated. That must not have happened, because in June, 2010, Home Secretary Theresa May announced that targets were abolished.

But again, that must not have occurred.

A 122-page report published in March, 2011, entitled Crime of the Century: A Chilling Look at Crime Statistics, Police Recorded Crime & Offences Brought to Justice in the UK,  stated the following: “The fact that over 30 of the 43 forces have retained performance targets scrapped by Theresa May is an indication of size and nature of the problem.”

With police encouraged to work to these targets by senior officers who are paid to achieve acceptable figures, it’s no wonder crime appears to be under control.

Early on in the report, the authors posed this pointed question:

“What if the truth is that crime didn’t fall at all—that it was only the statistics that fell, and in fact the illusion of falling crime was the biggest crime of them all?”

About the authors:

Dr. Paul Gallant and Dr. Joanne D. Eisen practice optometry and dentistry, respectively, on Long Island, NY. They have collaborated on firearm politics for the past 20 years, and are Senior Fellows at the Independence Institute in Denver, CO.  Alan J. Chwick is currently the Managing Coach of the Freeport Junior Club (FJC), at the Freeport NY Revolver & Rifle Association, Freeport, NY. Sherry Gallant has collaborated in their writing for the past few years, and has participated in the writing activities of her husband over the past 20 years.

Respective E-Mail addresses are:

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        • WTF? Why are we talking about obsurce Australia. Sterotype of particular ethnic groups? Also where did you get communism from that fricken urban dictionary article? It’s a British slur for continental bubba that’s why it’s used for a similar purpose inaustrlia not the othe way around

      • In the colonial period the British would refer to locals in the Asian colonies as “Worthy Oriental Gentlemen”, or WOGs. Unlike the actual words, it was a pejorative and term of derision as they in no way felt that the Orientals were their equals OR gentlemen. Essentially it was shorthand for paying them lip service without any real regard for their opinions.

        In the context of this statement it would appear to mean that if the immigrants preyed upon or killed it each other it is not worth mentioning since they are not worth being concerned about.

  1. The UK is a shithole. Every one of my UK buddies have long since left the country once they left the military.

    • I guess you’ve never been here.
      Get away from the big cities & the UK is a pretty decent place.
      Not that I wouldn’t be over the Pond in a flash if I were selfish enough to put my own desires before family duty.
      The report this TTAG references is mostly BS based on sensationalist media “reports” & bears little resemblance to real life – even in places like London.
      I’ve been to some truly dire places in the US but I don’t tar the whole nation based on what I saw, so do me the favour of not doing so to the UK.

      • Sadly, the yUK damned itself with its anti-gun (liberty) stance, love fest for “religion of Pieces” immigrants, and Statist (Big Gov) embrace of Socialistic democracy. I fear the beak of Britian was broken in WW1 when the cream of its male population was destroyed. After WW2, you see a mere shadow of a masculine population.

  2. Wow brits cooking the books to look like gun control works, well now we know where the antis learned it from.

      • They cook numbers too… well more likely just make them up or use a cooked survey with an obscenely small sample size made up of mostly non gun owners… you know what you’re right Blue I stand corrected.They are just making it up…

    • Wow; more evidence of how liberal progressive statist types will go to any length to obfuscate their true intentions and failed social philosophies all the while scamming the system for their own benefit.

      Pervasive it is, and everywhere it exists. In fact, this country is probably slow to get on board the ongoing liberal train wreck much of Europe has embraced. And these libby socialist extremists just never give up, even after they prove themselves wrong.

      If their social engineering methods aren’t working, that’s because there isn’t enough of it and the conservatives are standing in the way of their success. We need MORE socialism.

      What a crock! What a cretin way of thinking!

      You listening Obama, Reid!!!

    • Also, a burglar who breaks into a single apartment building would be considered one burglary, even if he broke into 10 different apartments.

    • No it wouldn’t & isn’t.
      I should know, having been closely involved in the investigation of one multiple murder & well acquainted with the statistical reporting of two others.

      How come you guys believe this badly “researched” paper that is based almost entirely on media reports whilst at the same time decrying your own media’s lack of objectivity & liberal bias?

      You can’t have it both ways.

  3. I suppose this begs the question of just how much you really can trust any information garnered from the Government. Or the Media. Or anything you don’t see with your own eyes. I know for a fact that Atlanta is still as much if not more of a sh!7hole as it’s ever been, and supposedly crime is down. I’d be surprised if this kind of book-cooking isn’t a widespread phenomenon.

  4. This brings up a worrying question in my mind. We gunnies like to point out that the American crime rate has gone up and down with seemingly no correlation to the introduction and expiration of the AWB and other gun control laws. Could that same data be manipulated the same way the UK’s data was?

  5. I’ve shown facts just like this to rabid defenders of the platform of anti-rights societal regression, which includes gun control among a great many other things, many dozens of times. It’s gotten to the point that I can do it in my sleep.

    It just doesn’t matter to any of them what the facts really are, or how many times they’ve been conclusively proven wrong morally, logically, and scientifically — and most often by their own data.

    They actively don’t give a shit. Period. Not about you. Not about your family. Not about your safety. Certainly not about your rights, or by extension, theirs.

    If it doesn’t stir their emotions to cleave to their socialist ideals, they’ll simply roll back into their routine of cognitive dissonance and pretend nothing is wrong. They only ever care if it gives them the warm-and-fuzzies, and they literally will not hear anything to the contrary. They don’t want debate. They don’t even want an “open and honest” discussion, especially not an honest one.

    ALL they want — demand actually — is your silent obedience.

    For them, war is peace, ignorance is strength, weakness is greatness, and freedom is slavery.

    • This. I sleep better now that I’ve realized some people simply cannot be reasoned with, at all. They’re pretty much going outside on a cloudless day and claiming the sky is brown and it’s a load off your shoulders when you stop caring to convince them otherwise.

    • I agree Excedrine.

      I have stated on this blog many times that many civilian disarmament proponents are hysterical — literally. And the rest are elitists who want to control your lives to their liking and benefit.

      As it turns out, people from both groups operate the same way: they use verbal gymnastics and try to shout down your rights. They just keep hurling words out hoping that something will stick.

      That said, I believe there are a minority of disarmament advocates who are acting on misinformation and fear and yet are neither hysterical nor have any desire to run another person’s life. For those types, a simple and brief conversation and a free trip to a shooting range will help them see and embrace the truth. Those are the people upon whom we should focus our efforts.

    • Exc,

      An apt description of many at the top level. However, don’t forget to leave out millions of low-information voters. They see a speech by Obama, and actually believe he can make good on his campaign promises. They believe that politicians care.

  6. So government and media are collaborating to foist a pack of lies on a gullible public.

    Does that also happen in England?

        • The last time anyone actually asked the English public what they wanted was in the Glorious Revolution of 1688, when Jimmie 2 was evicted with prejudice, for foisting a Catholic administration upon a Protestant country. This led to the Bill of Rights of 1689, which included the right to armed self defense. Nobody has listened or cared, since.

  7. C’mon now, we know the modus operandi here of anti-gun types. Feelings mean more than facts and only feelings count. Another reason to Enron accounting the crime stats. Same thing is happening here in the major cities.

  8. I disagree; the UK IS the “gun-free paradise” they anti-gun nuts are looking for.

    Only thing is, IT’S A LIE.

    • UK is a gun-free paradise the way the Soviet Union was a “Workers Paradise”. Same socialist/fascist crap.

  9. Wait, wut? Getting a bonus for doing your job, yet lying about a job done better than what really happened?
    That’s called theft by deception. According to the dollar amounts they’re reporting, that would be a felony.
    Cuff ’em and stuff ’em.
    Thanks for jacking my blood pressure. Dirty cops are the absolute worse criminals on the planet. OK, maybe serial killers are worse.
    When I took my oath back in the 80’s, there was something about not tarnishing the badge.
    This really pisses me off.

    • Personally I think dirty politicians are the worst human beings on the planet. Bad cops may serve them, follow orders, or serve their own interests. Bad cops damage a community and the public trust. Bad politicians damage whole nations.

  10. See, this only shows that Pierced Organ is a reliable source of news. Merely believe the opposite of what he says.

    BTW, has he pushed off for greener pastures yet? Or is he enjoying his new position as the CNN Ladies Room Attendant?

  11. This happens all over Europe. I had been a USAF SP stationed in Germany. One day, we were talking to a few members of the Polzei (German Police), and they mentioned a serious crime problem in a park near our base. It appears that this gang had been raping women in the park nearly every night. Up to that point, no one told us and there had been nothing in the German news. After a bit of prying and analysis, we discovered that the Germans had purposely kept this information from the public because it was embarrassing to them.

  12. This is my shocked face.

    Even with all this COMPLETELY DAMNING evidence, who’s taking bets on something actually changing? IN THE UK?
    Universal Knuckleheads.

  13. I hear all the time from my friends in the UK that they’ve got big problems with a group called Chavs. These are basically teens and young adults who don’t have steady work and/or have opted out of school and basically hang out on street corners, drink cheap alcohol, and cause a ruckus. Supposedly a lot of their offenses get swept under the rug because of their age and because they’re considered underprivileged working class.

    • Chavs aren’t “a group”, they’re not a gang or even a subculture, it’s just a way of categorising badly parented young twats of “working class” background.

    • It may offend the Chavs that you don’t include the key detail. A Chav must dress in designer clothes, preferably somewhat over-the-top versions. A Yob, by contrast, can dress in any non-style.

  14. Other great fakes:

    1) The Federal Reserve is officially part of government when in practice it is a private banking cartel allied in a partnership with government elites.
    2) The Federal Reserve Notes are US dollars when in reality the FRN that people use are an over-rated Monopoly paper fiat money currency not tied to anything of true worth or value but perception and hope.
    3) The suppression of political, social, and economic facts, reason, justice and truth created by radical feminist thinking resulting in the greatest intellectual crime of the past fifty-plus years and the fracturing of a functioning society.

    • I see you have read the Federal Reserve Charter. How unfair that they spell out their authorities right out there for all to see. It would help you understand why the charter was written the way it was if you knew a little economic history.

      The Federal Reserve was created in the wake of the Panic of 1907 when J. P. Morgan stepped in to save the banking system. Woodrow Wilson gets the credit for the law but the bill establishing the Federal Reserve was drafted under the Taft Administration. The purpose of the bill was to establish a publicly chartered but privately owned central bank. Contrary to the Ronulans, the Fed is perfectly constitutional under Congress’ authority to regulate the currency. The reason for making the Fed a creature of the banks was to prevent the politicization of monetary policy and not to create a banking cartel. (Not exactly a perfect success) 1907 was the last time a private individual like Morgan could save the banking system during a panic. The economy had gotten to big for a one man backup operation. My advice is either read some history or stick to your anti woman rhetoric.

      Here is book that might help you in this respect:

      “The Panic of 1907: Lessons Learned from the Market’s Perfect Storm ” by Robert Bruner and Sean Carr

      • If I knew a little economic history it would help me to better understand the FED? LMAO. My rhetoric was anti-feminist not anti-woman. You need an education and to develop your critical thinking skills. Stick to commenting at msnbc and the Huffington Post.

  15. Same thing happens anywhere big and political. Sgts that want to make lieutenant, LTs that want to make captain, Cpts that want to make Chief, Cheifs that want to be mayors…

    Everyone above the political waterline plays the game.

  16. OK so, long time UK lurker decloaking here.
    1. Yes anecdotal evidence of what I and others hear outside of the media suggest that the cops do significantly “juke the stats”.
    2. Not so much with regards firearms crime though, if anything that is over reported I suspect as there’s enough talk of police respoding with G36s to kids playing with toys in the garden.
    3. Generally the chattering classes hold answer to be more and more legislation rather than the cops concentrating on enforcing those already existing laws designed to protect people and their property. We’re drowning in laws and personally I think that the prohibitions on drugs, hunting, “dangerous” dog breeds” and some types of guns are, in effect, part of the problem.
    4. UK Police forces do vary regionally (but not so much as in the US I gather) so this will vary but some forces are downright lazy and entitled. This is because they have never been Mrs Thatcher, despite being a

  17. The sandnigger that decapitated a British solder recently would of had a terminal case of lead poisoning in short order if he tried that with me. With the gun laws in Britain I would of stepped over his dead body and continued on my way with no more thought about it.

    • You dumb shit, if you’re going to be a racist asshole, at least get your terminology right. The word you used is a pejorative term for someone of middle eastern descent. Michael Adebolajo is British, and his ancestry is Nigerian, which is sub-Saharan Africa, and pretty far from the Middle East.

      Oh, and by the way, it’s “would have had” and “would have stepped,” not “would of.” Dumbass.

  18. The writers of The Wire laid it all out for everyone to see. They called it “cooking the books”, just like accountants do. Human behavior is rather uniform across this planet. We didn’t get to the top of the food chain by being dummies. If you make rules, you can be assured that there will be someone, somewhere, who will figure out a way around it.

    • “Juking the stats” actually, but yes I agree. The problem with so many bad ideas is that they don’t acknowledge the realities of human behaviour or that (some) rules are bound to be broken. That is why prohibition – whether guns, alcohol or drugs is so disastrously harmful.

  19. Liberals are liberals ,It doesn’t matter what country they’re from.Liars are Liars and the Anti’s are some of the best.They just keep drinking the cool aid .And the Brits haven’t learned the Lesson the NAZIS taught them,very sad.Too bad for them .Just stay stupid and unarmed ,then make up facts about how good and safe you are.Make sure you pass it on to the ignorant public until they believe it and wait for the lambs to be led to the slaughter.

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