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“Writer’s block it happens to every blogger,” the Survivalist Blog blogger blogs, unfamiliar as he is with TTAG’s blistering posting pace. “To help me break through the block, I’d like for you to email me with any ideas for posts that you might have. Don’t hold back send any and all ideas, even if you think your ideas are dumb or far out, trust me they’re not.” Oh I don’t know about that . . .

1. If the SHTF, is it OK to shoot someone and eat them?

On one hand, I don’t know anyone who publicly supports hunting who doesn’t say you should eat what you kill, including Sarah Palin. [NB: I don’t mean you should eat Sarah Palin in any sense of that verb.] On the other, I know that cannibalism is off the menu. Generally speaking. But we’re talking survival here! If you’re starving to death and you have a gun and there’s someone not of your genetic line walking around like a mobile meat locker, well, should you? Would you? Skinning tips? Recipes?

2. What’s the best gun to use against the National Guard?

The left wing has been saying it for years: America’s militia men are preparing for war with their own government. As much as I love my government and dislike civilians who use military slang, it’s true that the Second Amendment was designed as a bulwark against tyranny from Uncle Sam himself. So let’s say society breaks down and the gun grabbers come a grabbin’. Forget about your long term all-rounder, your .22 rifle. You’re going to need something pretty significant to defend your right to bear arms. Suggestions? And how can you get that kind of firepower without the ATF sending in a tank like, now?

3. What’s the best way to shoot yourself?

Surviving the unsurvivable like, say, a nuclear bomb, can be a total bummer. At some point even the hardiest, best-trained and best-prepared survivalist may want to shuffle off this mortal coil. What’s the ideal way to end it all? Gun, caliber, point of aim? Is it ever OK to ask a loved one to shoot you, like when you’re too weak from radiation sickness to do it yourself? Enquiring minds want to know.

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  1. If we’re talking about a post-Nuclear scenario, then I think all bets are off. “Prepare to be unprepared” should be the rule of the day – you can physically prepare by stocking up on food, weapons, medicine and trade goods. The wholesale destruction of society’s infrastructure, the death of most (if not all) of one’s loved ones and friends and the drastic reduction in the availability of food, potable water, etc. would almost certainly blue and erase the boundaries of what’s acceptable to do and what isn’t.
    If all you can afford is a .22 and several bricks of ammo, then go for it. Even armored troops have to dismount at some point, and I can’t think of any that wouldn’t stay suppressed by withering fire from a Ruger 10/22 with a (gasp!) hi-cap magazine, especially if in concert with allies wielding something with a bit more punch.
    However, I would probably recommend, just for sheer reliability, at least one bolt-action centerfire. One in .223, and another (admittedly rare) in 7.62×39 – you want to be able to readily utilize ammo stores captured from an enemy.
    There is a scene from the movie The Road in which the Man and the Boy encounter some marauders and their barely functional truck. I thought the scene was tense, but unrealistic.
    Bandits with even half a brain won’t be decked out in that sort of scary regalia, but will try to appear to be just ordinary, desperate folk trying to get by right up until they draw a concealed weapon or their bushwacking friends open up from all sides.
    As for shooting yourself, a trauma nurse who saw a surprising number of gunshot suicide attempts fail told me that the trick is to keep your cheeks filled with water before pulling the trigger, so that the water (incompressible) will basically transmit the shock to a wider part of the brain.

    • The Road just didn’t make any sense to me. Why would people be the only living thing left? There should at least be cockroaches and rats to eat. In the other post-apocalyptic road-trip movie The Book of Eli people who need eat people get the shakes for some reason. As far as the National Guard, probably better to join them than to try to fight them. After 9+ years of counter-insurgency I would think even the weekendiest of weekend warriors would be pretty hard core.

  2. I think showing scenes of people devouring even low-level fauna would actually distract from the grimness of the Road’s scenario, as posited because those resources, as unpalatable as they are, are at least “renewable.” (I think it was rather wise to not specify the nature of the cataclysm).
    There’s a nice bit of additional gravitas as we see the Man and the Boy simply picking over the remnants of civilization, knowing that they are simply sniffing out an ever-diminishing pool of food caches.
    As for “fight ’em or join ’em” – I think there’d be a lot of switching on both sides if it comes down to it during a second Civil War.
    Post-Nuke holocaust, I think there’d probably be a contingent of military that would honestly try to round up survivors and rebuild, but there’d probably be just as many disbanded units roaming the countryside, scavenging for themselves.
    BTW, I mentioned bolt action centerfires as an “end of the world gun” I also think AK and SKS rifles are great, but I think a bolty is probably going to last longer with fewer parts needed. Plus, if the tide of gun rights swings back to the anti-side, it’s far less likely that our bolt-actions would be restricted or taken away.

  3. 1. My circle of friends refer to certain folks as ‘ambulatory rations’. These are the guys who don’t know how to clean a fish, wire a light switch, solder a pipe, build a dog house, or change the freakin’ air filter on their Lexus. Fortunately, most workout, shop at Whole Foods, and eat at decent restaurants – if cooked properly they should be rather high protein and tasty. (Saucing requirements are speculative at this time.)

    2. Preferably their own guns with them pulling the trigger. If the SHTF to the degree that the NG is out of control, I’ll be trying to infiltrate, sowing seeds of mistrust and betrayal. Actors in any dystopian theater of operation will be a triple-distillation of Randy Quaid paranoia. Wind ’em up and turn ’em on each other.

    3. Remember when you were a kid and had a Bomb Pop in your mouth while you had both hands on the handlebars of the bike? Replace the Bomb Pop with a 12 ga. and 00. The goal is to take out the brain stem and anything else you can get. Never, NEVER stick the gun in your mouth and point straight up. Yes, it may work, but it may not. Potentially leaving you sans eyes, nose and cheeks but still breathing. This result is no bueno and will greatly diminish your dating prospects. Temple shots are also a no-no. Especially with a handgun. You may die, or you may end up living like Stephen Hawking. Without the cool talking chair. Or the money. Or the IQ.

  4. Just remember if you are eating people, no rare steaks! Parasites and diseases in people can affect, well, people, so all your meals should be well done.

    Although a casserole or stew will help you stretch your meat.


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