Irresponsible Gun Owner of the Day: Shaneka Torres


Let me set the scene for you. It’s 3 AM on a week night, and you and your BFF suddenly get a craving for some cheeseburgers. So you hop in your ride, cruise down to the local Mickey D’s and pull into to the drive-thru lane. The over-worked, under-paid employee on the other end of the intercom takes your order, and when you pull around you’re handed your food…but without the bacon you’d ordered. What do you do? Well, obviously the best option is to pull your heater and put a round through the building. This is, after all, bacon we’re talking about . . .

From The Smoking Gun:

According to cops, after ordering at the drive-thru window, the 29-year-old Torres and another woman “complained that the order was incorrect.”  When a McDonald’s employee stepped away from the window, “one shot was fired from the suspect vehicle.”

Torres was reportedly upset because she expected bacon on the sandwich she ordered.

God knows that bacon is delicious. But – a word to the wise – it’s not worth a felony charge. While a dearth of smoked pork products is certainly cause for concern, it doesn’t constitute an actual life-or-death situation. To avoid prison and large legal bills, keep your gun holstered unless and until your life is actually threatened.

Shaneka Monique Torres is currently enjoying her stay in a (no doubt bacon-less) Michigan correctional facility awaiting trial on a smattering of charges. Hopefully the IGOTD award we’re sending along will keep her company.


  1. avatar AnotherOne says:

    But … it was bacon!

    1. avatar Bernard says:

      I was just about to say that. lol

      1. avatar mrvco says:

        Bacon is serial business!!!

        1. avatar A samurai says:

          She WANTED some damn bacon! She was super cereal! …..

          People like this give Antis wet dreams, she is one of the exceptions they use to prove their false logic. ‘Because if it happens even just once..’ as the Antis would say.

    2. avatar mac says:

      God only knows how many people have lost their lives over disputes involving bacon.

  2. avatar speedracer5050 says:

    You don’t mess with a persons bacon!! That’s an unforgivable offense!! Damn Mc D employees ought to know that!!

  3. avatar Anonymous says:

    Wow… shots fired over bacon. Wouldn’t have guessed that.

    “You take my bacon… I will kill you”

    1. avatar Heretical Politik says:

      Seems reasonable…

    2. avatar Gyufygy says:

      “My name is Inigo Montoya. You took my bacon. Prepare to die.”

      1. avatar TheOtherDavid says:

        Doh! Beat me to it!

      2. avatar A samurai says:

        Seems legit.

    3. avatar ThomasR says:

      Geez, you guys are nutz! You only go ballistic if you don’t get your green chile. Priorities! people, Priorities!

    4. avatar Cliff H says:

      Just a few posts ago Nick was waxing poetic about shots fired over bacon and nobody seemed indignant. Can we have a little consistency here?

      1. avatar jwm says:

        Yeah, but this time the porker was doing the shooting. Ain’t natural when a pig has a gun.

    5. avatar BlueBronco says:

      It got real up in there . . .

  4. avatar freakshowSMVM says:

    Would like to point out, she was not a legal carrier of said firearm. Just another case of a crazy hood rat, not a permit holder gone loco

    1. avatar RockOnHellChild says:

      A very clear distinction indeed.

    2. avatar Semper Why says:

      Where did you read that?

      As an aside, I do wish this blog would make it a point to include that information in their articles. I support carrying concealed weapons wherever one goes, especially at 3 AM. But I have to wonder at the nitwits who think firing a round through a restaurant is appropriate. I want to know where these antisocial approaches to life come from! I don’t think they’re a product of watching too much TV (although I haven’t watched TV is ages. Is this a typical scene on TV? Shoot up buildings over sandwiches?) I want to believe people who do such things should never have had the gun in the first place. But I can’t make that assumption.

      Gah, I wish we offered basic firearm safety as a course in elementary school.

      1. avatar Layne says:

        Have you ever driven by a “hood”? They grow up and live in an environment where this is considered the only reasonable response! Probably tens of thousands of similar shots are fired every night in America (luckily they don’t practice aiming much) but if it’s not against a fast food joint or innocent bystander you never hear about it. And yet people wonder why anyone would want the means to defend their self in this ‘advanced’ society we live in.

  5. avatar cogline says:

    The only thing worth firing off a round over is the McRib.

    1. avatar speedracer5050 says:

      Bacon Cheese Big Mac and fries!!

    2. avatar Nine says:

      Those are the most disgusting things I’ve ever tried.

      Those Shamrock shakes though, I’d slap my mama for one of those.

      1. avatar RockOnHellChild says:

        It’s should be called the McMeatloaf, there’s nothing rib about it.

        1. avatar Jus Bill says:

          Hell, there’s barely anything MEAT about it. Macerated predigested formed offal patties on a bun with red chemical sauce. At least the pickles resemble food.

    3. avatar Stinkeye says:

      The only way I’d fire a round over a McRib is if I was given the choice to eat the McRib or shoot myself.

  6. avatar Charles5 says:

    Something about “nothing good after midnight” comes to mind. Granted, there is no crime in being out after midnight, nor should there be. Some people have to work after midnight, the McDonald’s employee for one. However, it seems like an extremely high number of stupid things happen in the wee hours of the morning.

    1. avatar jwm says:

      Worked at a taco bell on the all night drive thru. Nothing normal is coming to your window at 2-3 in the am. Seems to be the witching hour. Before that you have the evening and graveyard shift people handling business. After that you get day shift people handling business. Don’t ask me about the carny folk.

  7. avatar Manimal says:

    Ha! What happens to me is that I’m usually miles down the road before I realize they messed up my order.

    1. avatar Carry.45 says:

      And then you just put a round into whatever’s nearby.

  8. avatar DS says:

    Stupid Mac D employee did not give Shitonya her bacon.

    1. avatar Vhyrus says:

      How do you pronounce that name?



      1. avatar endless nameless says:


        1. avatar Vhyrus says:

          Captain Obvious? Is that you?

        2. avatar endless nameless says:

          Chief Jumping Shark. sh!t.

  9. avatar launchpadmech says:

    She was just standing her ground!

    1. avatar Guner from Oregon says:

      It would probably take a lot of ground, for her to stand on!

  10. avatar PeterC says:

    Bacon deficiency causes your hair to turn white.

  11. avatar Gunracer1958 says:

    The 5’ 7”, 256-pound Torres is being held in lieu of $50,000 bond…………nuff said….

    1. avatar Manimal says:

      “What does she weigh, a deuce, deuce and a half?”

      1. avatar jwm says:

        No, but she can serve as a jackstand while you change the tire on a deuce and a half.

    2. avatar GS650G says:

      That kind of weight needs bacon on a regular basis, especially if she isn’t getting any sausage or hot dogs.

      1. avatar Jeff says:

        looks like a fan of tacos to me

      2. avatar Guner from Oregon says:

        Would you want to be the one to give her sausage or hot dogs?

        1. avatar Jus Bill says:


  12. avatar Mark C says:

    The one positive outcome from this incident is that other customers of this particular McDs are likely to find bacon on everything they order.

    1. avatar LongBeach says:

      Mmmmm, Filet ‘O Fish with bacon….

      1. avatar Mark C says:


    2. avatar Model 31 says:

      Bacon strip happy meals

      1. avatar EthanB says:

        My son would love these! Bacon is his favorite food group, and he’s three. Damn kid is skinny as a rail too.

    3. avatar Model 31 says:

      Bacon strip happy meal

    4. avatar Adub says:

      An armed society IS a polite society!

  13. avatar BTinAfghan says:

    The fact she was eating at McDs strengthens her case for temporary insanity.

    Also 3:00a.m. is their another 3:00, It is 3:05 a.m. right now, think I get a bacon cheeseburger

    1. avatar ropingdown says:

      Bacon as a person’s meds: Yep, just another person off their meds. She needed that bacon. Obviously.

  14. avatar RockThisTown says:

    ” . . . keep your gun holstered unless and until your life is actually threatened.”

    Her life WAS being threatened – being denied her bacon!

  15. avatar mrvco says:

    It looks more like said employee dumped a vanilla milkshake on her head.

  16. avatar Ralph says:

    What’s hotter than natural blonde with a gun?

    1. avatar HiPlanesDrifter says:

      Hmm . . . a $50 Saturday night special?

      Sorry. Couldn’t resist.

    2. avatar Don says:

      The film negative looks OFWG.

      1. avatar Paelorian says:

        You, sir, are the post’s comments winner.

    3. avatar ropingdown says:

      To, uh, bleach my memory of the post’s photo….the Gish sisters cross-cut with brief excerpts from a prron film, Godard, and see e.g. Griffith, Stiller, Truffaut, et al.

      A girl with a gun, but, please, not THAT girl!

    4. avatar Vhyrus says:

      An unnatural blonde? In prison?

      Okay I give up.

    5. avatar jwm says:

      Only one way to know if she’s a natural blonde. And I ain’t taking that hit for the team.

  17. avatar GS650G says:

    Yeah the munchies at 2 AM is a real big deal.
    Nice hair style, I bet she played the guy in the relationship.

  18. avatar TheOtherDavid says:

    Jailed in lieu of $50,000 bond, Charges of carrying a concealed weapon, discharge of a firearm, felony firearm charge, also had an outstanding bench warrant for unpaid fines associated with driving with a suspended license. The icing on the cake, or the maraschino cherry in your McD shake as it were, is that they tracked her down from her telephone number. Her telephone number that she left with an employee at the first drive-through window after flirting with him. All of this is from the UPI website.

    1. avatar endless nameless says:

      they should tack on an extra year to her sentence for being that amazingly stupid.

  19. avatar Hannibal says:

    Tactical bacon?

  20. avatar flushot70 says:

    She had ordered a sandwich earlier that same day and they had forgot to add the bacon. She called the restaurant to complain, the manager agreed to give her a free meal at her next visit. She supplied her name and phone number to the manager. After clubbing with her bff they went to claim the free meal. Received her order for the second time without bacon. Luckily they already had her name from her claiming the free meal.

    1. avatar ropingdown says:

      Forget the bacon twice? No wonder!

      1. avatar Guner from Oregon says:

        The clerk must of been a vegetarian.

        1. avatar Arnie says:

          There’s no such grammatical construct as “must of”, friend. You’re (sadly) approximating the sound of the contraction “must’ve”.

          The More You Know

        2. avatar Cliff H says:

          Sorry, must’ve, being actually grammatically correct would not be appropriate in this situation. Proper correction would be “musta.”

  21. avatar applejack says:

    I thought this article was about Simon Phoenix (Wesley Snipes) in Demolition Man.

  22. avatar James says:

    Someone should form the Association to Prevent Stupid Baby Names. How can two parents (or one, at least) look down at a little newborn infant and inflict a name like “Shaneka” on the poor thing. I wouldn’t do that to a hamster, much less a human being. Result: A permanent bad attitude that results in ill-advised hair care and homicidal rage at burger assembly technicians. If she’d been named “Susan” or “Elizabeth” she might now be studying a cell under a microscope instead of a cell inside a jail. Or maybe not . . .

    1. avatar Ralph says:

      Susan or Elizabeth? I’m thinking that Butch or Diesel would be more appropriate.

      1. avatar James says:

        Those names are at least actual words and they do appear to be appropriate descriptors of the female in question. The lack of objection to foolish monickers is all part of the general decline of honest English. “Personnel” is now “human resources.” “Insane asylum” is now “treatment center.” “Wastrel” is now “community organizer.” Even our own ranks are falling victim to the trend. Hunters don’t shoot or kill deer; they “harvest” them.

        1. avatar Russ Bixby says:

          Have to try scythe hunting one o’ these days…

        2. avatar Ardent says:

          I consider hunting and harvesting two separate activities. To my mind hunting implies going afield, stalking quarry and with a preference for more interesting specimens as opposed to the best meats while harvesting implies taking either the likely best meat animal or simply the easiest to get at from the most comfortable position in the most likely manner to effect a kill and recovery.

          Contrast the hunter in camouflage awaiting a big buck in a tree stand to a harvester sitting in the back of a pickup truck on a lawn chair watching a feeding station in an open field.

          It’s not that I have more or less respect for either approach as they are intended to accomplish different goals (generally the former is a type of sport performed for entertainment while the latter is intended only to supply meat). It’s just that, at least to me, they are very different activities.

    2. avatar Guner from Oregon says:

      “How can two parents (or one at least)”…….I’ll bet you a beacon sandwich it’s the latter.

    3. avatar Russ Bixby says:

      Shaneka is not an uncommon same, being a feminizong of Shan, which is of English origin and a variation on Sean. Compare with Siona of Shawna.

      Non-English names are no sign of the decline and fall of Engligh. Neither is Torres English, for that matter, although it’s certainly American enough.

      I tend to cut “people of colour” a bit of slack on names, anyway, if they are choosing something “Africanesque;” it’s an understandable backlash against the forcible removal way back when of family and personal names and their replacement with Toby Jackson or some such.

      Very few posters ’round here get to throw grammatical stones, anyway.

      Their just isn’t anywy they’re language is good enough to justify complaint about other’s. For all intensive purposes, there at about a sixth grade level, or worse. Personally, I could care less but still it needs pointed out…

  23. avatar jwm says:

    Thank god there was no popcorn involved. Somebody coulda got killed.

    1. avatar Nine says:

      That was just low.

      But I still chuckled.

    2. avatar Russ Bixby says:


  24. avatar jkp says:

    More than just irresponsible, I think this one gets the Criminal gun-owner of the day award.

  25. avatar Gude Poast says:

    Another victim of the white racist system. The bitter clingers instilled her rage. The NRA convinced her that guns were cool. They even brainwashed this poor underprivileged minority victim with the racist notion that blonde hair = beauty.

  26. avatar TheOtherDavid says:

    I can see a whole new fast food marketing line. The Mc Ruger, the Big Mac-10. A beef and bean Berett-o. Washed down with a frosty mug of S&W root beer.

    I admit to some trouble with my Austrian brand. Glocko Bell? Glock in the Box?

    1. avatar Vhyrus says:

      Del Draco?
      El Colto Loco?
      Kel-Teco Bell?
      Kimber King?

      1. avatar TheOtherDavid says:

        Ok, I admit, Snubway and Glock-Fil-A made me spit my coffee. Well done, well done.

        Glockeye’s Chicken?
        Col. Cooper’s KFC?

        1. avatar Vhyrus says:

          I should have said Keltecy Fried Chicken.

      2. avatar TheOtherDavid says:

        Keltecy. Perfect.

      3. avatar Russ Bixby says:

        For the kiddies:

        Daisy Queen
        Knight’s Crossman
        GLOCKy Cheese…

  27. avatar What about Bob says:

    Come on…..

    Who amongst us wouldn’t have at least considered, doing the same thing under the circumstances?

  28. avatar Guner from Oregon says:

    I wouldn’t want to get close to anything that size. Piss her off, and she might hit you on top your head and break both your ankles!
    My wife is a manager at the local MacDonald’s, Every night when she gets home from her swing shift job, she has a story to tell, which is why I never eat there.

    1. avatar TexanHawk says:

      Yet you don’t object to her working there?

      1. avatar Guner from Oregon says:

        I enjoy the “stories”

    2. avatar Vhyrus says:

      Buy her a mouse gun and tell her to pack at work. I’m sure not even a manager’s salary is worth death or debilitation.

      1. avatar Guner from Oregon says:

        I gave that one up years ago, right after we were married. She has a pretty violent temper (Asian) She has gotten a kitchen knife after me before. I can work with that, but not a gun.

        1. avatar Vhyrus says:

          An Asian with a knife? Nevermind then, keep the gun for yourself.

  29. avatar TexanHawk says:

    Surprised nobody’s mentioned it yet: Hatfield and McCoy feud began over…. BACON!

  30. avatar Venator Magnus says:

    I’m assuming, based on high, high probability, that her previous criminal record would’ve prohibited her from owning a firearm in the first place.


    1. avatar Semper Why says:

      One of the charges she is facing is carrying a concealed weapon without a permit.

  31. avatar Troutbum5 says:

    They f**k you at the drive-thru! So who gets f**ked? Shaneka, that’s who. But not this time, dammit.

  32. avatar Maineuh says:

    Two all beef patties, sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a BAM! BAM!

    1. avatar endless nameless says:


  33. avatar Jeff Anderson says:

    The Moms are on it.

    {Moms Demand Action ‏@MomsDemand Feb 11
    MI woman arrested after shooting at McDonalds employees for getting her order wrong: #SMH #gunsense}

    1. avatar Sammy says:

      Moms demand bacon. MMMMMMMMMMMM Bacon.

  34. avatar Randy Drescher says:

    Jimmy Dean is calling for felony charges….on the person that forgot the bacon.

  35. avatar Sammy says:

    Any connection between this incident and Nick’s flying hog-n-ator vid?

  36. avatar Russ Bixby says:

    Wow… How can someone that damned stupid even figure out how to point and shoot?

    It’s unlikely that the overworked, underpaid public defender will be able to save that b¡tch’s bacon, so she can cool her bacon where there ain’t much bacon.

    Think I’ll go fry me some, just in celebration and cerebration of my not being – that.

  37. avatar Gov. William J. Le Petomane says:

    At least she didn’t call 911 to complain. She’s got that.

  38. avatar Barstow Cowboy says:

    When they messed up her order she should’ve just kept her cool and called 911 like a normal person.

  39. avatar Ben says:

    That McDonalds is only a few blocks from my house; honestly when it hit our local news I could hardly stop laughing it seems so fake.

    At least they caught the crazy lady quick…

  40. avatar CoolBreeze72 says:

    Quality control meets trigger control.

  41. avatar CoolBreeze72 says:

    Kinda like Goodfellas’ Joe Peschi shooting the waiter in the foot.

  42. avatar Gregolas says:

    Funniest thread I’ve ever read. Tears from laughter. Thanks all.

    This drive through incident approved by Rommel MacDonald.

    1. avatar jwm says:

      A drive by at the drive thru.

  43. avatar Paddyofurniture says:

    This is hands down the best comments of the year so far of an article Ive seen!

  44. avatar Aaron says:

    she’s looks like she IS bacon

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