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In conjunction with the Department of Homeland Security, the Transportation Security Administration has just announced a proposal to allow armed Americans onto scheduled domestic flights. The Authorized Concealed Carry Program (ACCP) will create a new class of trained and approved concealed carry permit holders who will be allowed to carry on airplanes . . .

“The terrorist attack in Brussel highlights the need for a radical change in thinking,” TSA Director Troy McLure told a skeptical Washington press corps. “We need an effective deterrent for terrorists that extends beyond the security checkpoints and onto planes . . . Expanding the Air Marshall program would cost billions of taxpayer dollars, and only provide a marginal improvement to the safety of the American traveler.”

“The ACCP would be a force multiplier for Homeland Security,” DHS Director Sojahsay Johnson added. “We’ll be working with the FBI to select, background check and train qualified Americans who travel regularly. We’ll provide them with the skills they need to safely and discreetly carry firearms on domestic flights — and use them to defend against terrorist attack if needed —  without putting fellow passengers at risk.”

“Airplanes are the least armed slice of society most Americans encounter; the results are self evident,” McClure insisted. “While we anticipate some resistance to the ACCP, we don’t want to wait until another Brussels-style attack to take positive actions to ensure the safety of American airplane passengers.”

The Standing Committee on Public Safety and National Security is due to hear testimony on the proposal sometime next week.

 

Publication date: 4/1/16

62 COMMENTS

  1. Maybe it’s just me but I never liked this internet Apr 1 tradition…

    I’ll spend day in the workshop or reloading or something else I suppose.

    Have fun.

  2. When I read the headline, I thought TSA agents were now allowed to carry on the job and was properly terrified. I’ve never been happier to read a good April Fools joke.

  3. TSA Director Troy McLure – you may remember him from earlier TSA proposals such as “LASERs on Sharks: Why Not?” and “Don’t give the finger to the guy who does Body Cavity Searches”.

  4. The Federal gov’t not wanting to expand a federal program… There was your tell.

  5. Hi, I’m Troy McLure. You might remember me from such trolling masterpieces as Republican Convention Open Carry, Trump 2016, @robwhisman, Obama’s “executive orders”, and the Moon landings.

  6. I was going to joke that Pegasus Airlines would be the pilot program for this, but it turns out that’s actually a real airline.

  7. Yeah that is totally believable if it were to obtain a permit to film a terror attack on an airplane instead of fight against one…

  8. april april but principle pessange should be able after an maximum restriction of an weekend course to carry on airplanes.
    If see the case here of the bastard Andreas Lubitz and in the us the 9-11 it s realy needet thats passenger are armed and not one person should have the power to lock the doors alone !!
    But the hard reality is that a lof of one person suckers as joe straus (texas) ore Diaz de la Portilla (florida) can stopped all bills as an fat dicatator that lives in north korea …………
    Back the powered to the people stoped the gouverment !!

  9. Please leave the lies to Bloomberg. I come here for the truth.

    “April Fools” is a curse on the internet.

    • +1 to this. I feel sorry for anyone who may have to deliver genuine bad news to me on April 1st, because I suspend all credulity to avoid the kind of “jokes” that “hilarious” people like to “tell” on that date.

      And here’s a tip for those folks: Developing an authentic sense of humor takes a lot of work, I know, but accept no substitutes; it’s ultimately far more rewarding than setting aside one day per year to lie to people.

  10. Ahhhh….what a headline ,”the federal government in a dramatic turn of events now supports the Constitutional right of every American removing all gunfree zone signs and has started a training program for all who wish to attend, national reciprocity has been enacted and millions of responsibly armed Americans every celebrate”.

  11. Oh, funny… And I know who’s going to implement this program: Nick Leghorn. The same guy who agrees with the TSA on never allowing guns on commercial airplanes, because people can’t be trusted with guns. I can just hear Nick saying, “I support the 2A, but…”

  12. It’s friggin about time!Training will be necessary Airframes Are not designed to stop bullets. Explosive decompression can happen Killing the entire crew That is not seat belted in. However there are Ammunitions specifically designed not to penetrate The airframe Under Pressure. I believe There is a safety slug That is filled With small LED BB’s almost like a shotgun shell That can be fired out of semi-automatic handguns that is very lethal But will not penetrate the aluminum aircraft skin or Windows causing explosive decompression. But along with these Rounds, Training does have to be A must Do to The Soft target that an aircraft Encompasses.

  13. They should have done this after 9:11 forget about the recent terrorist attacks 911 could have been completely Stopped And loss of life Would have been Possibly completely eliminated If armed Americans would have been on those aircraft that were hijacked. Those terrorists would have been eliminated with extreme prejudice with a quickness. Never bring a knife to a gunfight LOL.

  14. Hey, we’re gonna do something sensible, grounded in facts and reasoning. April Fools!

    You know something’s wrong when you can tell the news is an April Fools’ joke because it makes perfect sense.

  15. Instead of Authorized Concealed Carry Program (ACCP), should have called it Citizen Concealed Carry Program (CCCP).

  16. Now if it had been “Rugby Players on all flights….”

    /Mark Bingham, Todd Beamer, Tom Burnett and Jeremy Glick

  17. This is getting truly annoying. Are you people adolescent 15 year olds with all your April Fools posts?

  18. This was actually so logical I knew it had to be a prank. The government would never be so logical!

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