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America’s Next Top Shot is A Ferret Jacked-Up on Cappuccinos. Or Not.


Friday’s the deadline for applicants who aspire to be Season 4’s Top Shot. Rest assured, I sent in my app, looking to represent OFWGs who’ve never served a day in the military. I’m thinking about making a video for the producers, but something tells me I don’t have a chance against people like this: a fast-talking OCD former bull-rider turned nuclear engineer who’s happy to tell the world that he crashed his motorcycle (and spent some time in a coma) when he went off his meds. A man who plans on winning by not being last. Over to you CUJO.


  1. avatar eggyknap says:

    Less talk. More shoot. Oh, and I want that range closer to my house. I’m sick of paper targets only, no rapid fire, no .50 BMG (not that I have the gear to violate that last rule…)

  2. avatar Dryw says:

    I’m thoroughly exhausted after watching that.

    I vote no, based on the fact that it was a Neos… and no other particularly valid reason.

  3. avatar Daniel Zimmerman says:

    Dude. Decaf.

  4. avatar JOE MATAFOME says:

    I hope they stick to mainly guns next year and lose all those other silly weapons.

  5. avatar Ralph says:

    Next month he’ll ride his motorcycle from New York to Paris in under twelve hours while holding his breath. Impressive indeed.

  6. avatar CUJO THE DOG OF WAR says:

    I’ve got him beat. I remember so many weapon systems because I have one of those Pornographic Memories!

    1. avatar Ralph says:

      CUJO, nobody uses a pornograph anymore. Everything’s digital.

  7. avatar CUJO THE DOG OF WAR says:

    Isn’t a ferret a type of weasel?

  8. avatar Paul R says:

    How does one apply to top shot?

    1. avatar Robert Farago says:

      Click on the link with CUJO’s name.

      1. avatar CUJO THE DOG OF WAR says:

        Thanks for the link, Robert. I will put in later, this cut off is today. I just started pain management for the migraines/cracked eye socket-I’ve been on morphine for 4 days now. Once I have control, then I start training up again. I already started working on my wavemaster kick bag. My bulldog attacks the face for me every time I knock it over!

  9. avatar Buuurr says:

    Got to 1:08 and had to stop because my heart rate was climbing listening to this guy. I will give you two words that spell out why this guy can not be top shot. Breathing control.

    1. avatar CUJO THE DOG OF WAR says:

      You got that right!

  10. avatar poppymann says:

    Colby talks like a dog with peanut butter on rhe roof of his mouth.

    1. avatar Robert Farago says:

      Capped teeth. You gotta suffer for your art.

      1. avatar poppymann says:

        Jeff Probst taught him well.

  11. avatar CUJO THE DOG OF WAR says:

    This reminds me-does The Deadliest Warrior come on anymore? I loved when they had the comparison of LAPD SWAT and GSG 9 weapons.

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