You can almost hear the 3D printers spinning up throughout the northeast with the news from the Brooklyn District Attorney’s Office that they’re holding a gun “buyback” this weekend and paying obscene amounts of money for functional guns. Yes, this Saturday, December 17th, they’ll be paying $500 for functional handguns. If you’re one of first 25 participants, they’ll throw in an iPad, too!
Yes, there are caveats. You have to drive to Brooklyn to cash in on this offer. And you have to not get arrested on your way into the crime-free, gun-controlled utopia that is Brooklyn. Or while you’re waiting in the long line to get into the location.
In my experience, sponsors usually run out of cash pretty quickly when they’re offering insane amounts of cash for junk. What happens to those folks left holding guns when the Brooklyn District Attorney runs out of cash? Will they simply have their guns confiscated under threat of arrest if they don’t “cooperate?”
“Five hundred dollars for guns, and a threat of arrest when we run out of cash” doesn’t sound like a winning slogan, but it in Brooklyn, participants might discover it rings true.
Or course, if you’re lucky enough enough to offload some crappy gats for actual cash, you’ll have to get out of there without getting carjacked, robbed, shot or otherwise violated by opportunistic criminals.
Imagine the crooks who will be orbiting the buyback location just looking for easy marks leaving with a few thousand dollars and a free iPad. Those leaving the event will have just surrendered their guns trying to get home while defenseless. Cha-ching!
It almost sounds like a cooperative venture between a “progressive” prosecutor and violent criminals who roam the streets with impunity. In fairness, DA Eric Gonzalez doesn’t count himself among those prosecutors who enjoy Soros-funding, but he shares their ideas about criminal justice. From the New York Times . . .
Across the country, many of Mr. Gonzalez’s peers in what has come to be known as the “progressive prosecutor” movement — including Alvin Bragg, Manhattan’s newly elected district attorney — have struggled to balance the competing demands. Although it is unclear what is causing the spike in shootings, their critics have focused on what they see as heightened scrutiny of the police, an emphasis on social services over prosecution and the easing of bail and sentencing laws.
Mr. Gonzalez has largely escaped such scrutiny, despite pursuing similar policies for years.
New chance to get rich just dropped pic.twitter.com/3cQYIgW69P
— Rob Romano (@2Aupdates) December 15, 2022
As someone who has participated at a few of these over the years, I’ll admit they can be fun. At the same time, I’m not sure I’d want to walk in with sixty-five functioning clunkers in a wheel barrow and expect not to be robbed six ways from Sunday within a few blocks of leaving the place.
Folks on Twitter have had fun with this announcement.
3D printer go brrrrrrrr
— ThatBullpupGuy (@CaptnCreg) December 15, 2022
A Hi Point JHP costs $179.99 retail
— GENERAL RAPTOR (@General_Raptor) December 15, 2022
Dollar General dart guns are a 50 to 1 investment! pic.twitter.com/e06TWK1xxD
— ALiteralShibaInu (@LiteralInu) December 15, 2022
Ordinarily, I’d encourage folks to turn in their old, rusty clunkers for plenty of perfectly good cash. However in this case, I’m not sure the juice is worth the squeeze. If you do participate, make sure you’re not the squeeze.