Weekend Photo Caption Contest – Win a Laserlyte SCV4 Pistol Laser

Last week’s champ was uncommon_sense. He’ll be receiving a pack of Swab-Its just as soon as I get off my butt and get it mailed to him. This week’s winner will receive a Laserlyte SCV4 pistol laser. Just enter the best caption for this photo by Sunday midnight and you have a shot. So to speak.


  1. avatar A Guy says:

    “Hey Tommy, that’s a nice gun you got there”

    “I told you my name is Ralph”

    “Eh, whatever, not like anybody will remember”

  2. avatar former water walker says:

    Tommy what shall we name his gun?

  3. avatar Mr.Savage says:

    wanna touch my wood?

  4. avatar Ragnarredbeard says:

    Look what I found in Capone’s vault.

  5. avatar TKCinema says:

    “Here you go, Ms Reno. Just point that end at the Dividian complex.”

  6. avatar Bud Harton says:

    “No, I seriously hate being assigned to cavity inspections but this time, it was like a thrill ride. The harder I pulled, the more that came out. Oh, it got tense around the magazine and I had to use both hands and brace my feet against the wall. The prisoner? He’s fine, but he keeps puckering up and throwing kisses to me every time I walk past his cell”

    1. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

      OK. That was some funny sh!t
      Now to get that mental image outta my brain.

  7. avatar Gregolas says:

    “Yup, Guys, being able to own something like this Baby is what American freedom is all about! Nobody’ll ever be able to take our guns away from us!”

  8. avatar Fzangler says:

    Uhh Captain, how do if fit this in my holster?

  9. avatar Justin Case says:

    Alas, poor Tommy. I knew him well…

  10. avatar GarryOwen-37 says:

    Well Bill, since you only shot four innocent bystanders in last weeks bank robbery, the Chief was so impressed, he has decided to nominate you as this precincts designated marksman. Here’s your Tommy, go make us proud. *Ass smack*

  11. avatar ray says:

    I told you there was a pistol in there Moe!

    What; a pistol?, say Larry.

    You numbskulls? It’s a drumstick with 2 handles to holsd whiel you eat it!

  12. avatar Gov. William J Le Petomane says:

    Nope, look right there – ‘M-A-T-E-L’. That’s a dead giveaway.

    1. avatar Big Bill says:

      Not for the caption: First time I saw an M-16, (and I’m sure I’m not the only one) I looked for “Made by Mattel on it.

      1. avatar jwm says:

        Yep. Square needles and Mattel were popular myths in the day.

  13. avatar Madcapp says:

    “I wish it was offered in 9MM, then you might actually have something”.

    1. avatar Eric in Oregon says:

      “Thank God, finally a caliber nobody can argue about”

  14. avatar TommyJay says:

    “I see the little carriage return, but where do I feed the paper?”

  15. avatar Roger Rutherford says:

    and then she said “I you buy that gun I’m leaving.

  16. avatar SurfGW says:

    Typewriters in Chicago suck! Where is the keyboard?
    It only types periods!

  17. avatar jimmy james says:

    He had it hidden where?

  18. avatar California Richard says:

    Guy holding 1921: “What the hell am I supposed to do with this thing?”

    Chief: “I dunno’…. Put it on shelf….. maybe a hundred years from now, when nobody cares about these things, they’ll chop and melt it.”

    3rd cop: “It’s almost time for breakfast….. Ya’ fella’s wanna’ get a drink?”

  19. avatar 10x25mm says:

    Imagine! You can miss 50 times without reloading! The State Police version is rumored to allow 100 misses without reloading. What will they think of next?

  20. avatar jwm says:

    In my day all we needed was a 5 shot break top .32 revolver and a truncheon. You kids and your new fangled gizmos.

  21. avatar jwm says:

    Nothing says “Get Off My Lawn!” louder than 50 rounds of .45acp on full auto.

  22. avatar Toby Johnson says:

    No, it’s legal…there’s the bullet button, and this is an arm brace

  23. avatar jwm says:

    I order a coffee maker and this shows up. Sears is getting a call from me monday morning.

  24. avatar rt66paul says:

    Do you think this is too much gun for a 5 year old? I want to give it to her for her birthday a day early, so she can take it for show and tell.

  25. avatar Mikeoregon says:

    Say these new fangled revolvers are bigger and heavier than our old ones.

  26. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    “And just think, in 60 years we’ll get a carve out and be able to buy them cheap and no stupid special tax!”

  27. avatar Pete says:

    “Where do the bullets go in again?”

  28. avatar doug says:

    “…weirdest violin I’ve ever seen. Old Stradivarius never made one like this!”

  29. avatar tmm says:

    I’ve got an idea…let’s throw it in the safe and forget about it for eighty years…

  30. avatar William says:

    “You should be able to hit something with this and just in time for Valentines Day!”

  31. avatar DDUB says:

    Where’s the shoulder thingy that goes up?

  32. avatar cmac890 says:

    Despite bringing in haul after haul, Officer Callaghan never figured out that his nose wasnt pointy enough to make Sergeant.

  33. avatar Cliff H says:

    No, we’re covered even without the carve-out. That IS the standard size magazine.

  34. avatar Ironhead says:

    Oooooh….. so that’s a Chicago streetsweeper…. I thought they were union!

  35. avatar The Rookie says:

    “Are you *sure* this thing will take Glock magazines?”

  36. avatar Hoplopfheil says:

    “… and this is what you use when they go on strike.”

  37. avatar Gary says:

    “I copped it out of Ness’s car. How come we can’t have toys like this Chief? The Feds get all the new toys & we’re still popping 32’s!”

  38. avatar Mike Betts says:

    Impressive, isn’t it? It’s a good thing the bad guys will never get hold of it!

  39. avatar Model66 says:

    Here it is boys, “The End All, Be All.”
    You betta get used to it, too. We’ll be shooting these for the next hundred years.

  40. avatar Claymore says:

    Ladies love outlaws, like a copper touches guns.

  41. avatar Jeff K says:

    It goes bang 50 bazillion times a second, really.

  42. avatar Peashooter says:

    Can you believe some dumbass turned this in at our gun buyback? This will make a nice one for my collection!

  43. avatar Higgs says:

    New Jersey police inspect the last gun allowed in the state without a payoff in advance

  44. “It’s not a bomb, Johnson. Hold it like you know what your doing, you Fop.”

  45. The guy holding is a little too into it

  46. avatar Jason says:

    Now, the trouble with the 40-watt plasma rifle is the bulky, round battery. But it’s only got enough juice for 10 shots, so it’s legal in California.

  47. avatar Tom Worthington says:

    “So, if I put a little oil on this and keep the humidity away from it, what do you fellas figure it will be worth in oh say 2017?”

  48. avatar Jay godding says:

    “We’ll finally have more bullets than buttons with his bad boy”

  49. avatar Wild Thing says:

    Where do you put the batteries?

  50. avatar J says:

    “Wheres the aimpoint?”

  51. These Keystone Cops are serious as a heart attack!

  52. avatar Glorfindel says:

    “What is it?” “Beats me, but it’s the biggest tip I ever got!”

  53. avatar Justin Cade says:

    This right here has the ability with a .30-caliber clip to disperse with 30 bullets within half a second.

  54. avatar JohnS says:

    Airsoft. It’s the future, chief!

  55. avatar Chayne Harding says:

    Should we stop by the range and try it out before it goes in the evidence locker?

  56. avatar JR Pollock says:

    “Ya know, we could sell this to a gangster, and then say he stole it from us. Who’s to say differently??””

  57. avatar No one of consequence says:

    Gold plate it and send it to Sessions. And no, Bob, it’s not a bribe to get a Federal grant. Call it a … preemptive thank-you.

  58. avatar John says:

    Detachable magazine, pistol grip, fore grip: geeze Carl, whatever you do don’t paint it black. The press will call it “scary” and then “it’s on”!

  59. avatar Steve in TX says:

    Well we better order more, you know how we lose things.

  60. avatar The Giant Skunk says:

    Evidence found in the Van Owen shooting. Headless suspect sought. Goes by the name of Roland.

  61. avatar uncommon_sense says:

    June 19, 1934:
    That’s right boys … as of next week you will have to pay a huge tax and get a stamp from the federal government before you can buy one of these.

  62. avatar NJ-EMT says:


  63. avatar BadBob says:

    I’m thinking blaze orange color fill on this, what do you think?

  64. avatar Tim says:

    What do you mean “is it semiauto?” Are you kidding?!

  65. avatar jwm says:

    You say a Marine gave you that for a case of beer and a 5 dollar hooker?

  66. avatar Paul says:

    Get your own! This one’s mine!

  67. avatar jwm says:

    He said pew, pew, pew. I said budda, budda, budda.

    That stamped “The End” on his medical records.

  68. avatar Ing says:

    It shoots through schools.

    1. avatar jwm says:

      It’s chambered in .88 magnum?

      1. avatar Big Bill says:

        The .88 would shoot through schools.
        The .88 magnum would shoot through the Pentagon!

  69. avatar tsbhoa.p.jr says:

    “i had dillinger sign it with a sharpie.”

  70. avatar Zeke says:

    “Some deaf, dumb, and blind kid got so mad when he lost at pinball, he used this to shoot up the whole arcade.”

  71. avatar Tim McCartney says:

    So, O’Malley pulls this out and says, “make me day boyo!”

  72. avatar rambler34 says:

    You know boys 90 years from now officers will be thankful we had these. Chicago will be the model city with no crime.

  73. avatar T says:

    Alleged photo of the first Ghost Gun. While many claim the photo is clearly a hoax, true believers rally around the photo as evidence of the hidden truth of deadly racist Ghost Guns.

  74. avatar AaronW says:

    “Yeah, it’s surplus. Some guy named Roland with a funny accent wants to buy it from us.”

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