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Next Post has an article discussing the immense benefits of hunting feral pigs, namely removing an invasive alien species and getting bacon at the same time. Which is all 100% true — pigs are terrible animals that destroy crops and property. Like the marijuana crop that one of the commenters on the article says was eaten by some (now very stoned) hogs. And seriously, what’s better than fresh, locally grown food? Which reminds me: hunter education classes start soon, and my old hunting permit expires at the end of the month. Time to invest in another year of enjoying the Texas wildlife…

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    • What I had in mind was having sex with A WOMAN (specifically, my wife), while eating bacon laced with cannabinol.


  1. I’ve never hunted but have been considering becoming a beginner at my advanced age (50+). I’ll leave the trophy deer to those that want, well, a trophy. Hunting feral hogs appeals to me. NC has recently passed night hunting of coyotes & feral pigs. Seems like a silencer/suppressor would be ideal. No late night booms scaring the neighbors, possibility of taking multiple hogs before they spook & run, etc. Alas, the paperwork & expense is burdensome. Plus do I really want to be on the government’s “extra-special” list? There is nothing so convoluted and difficult to understand as a man-made system. Oh well, what are you gonna do? Stop the world, I want to get off!

  2. Yummy.

    Every time I see one of these hogs now I think of Jerry Campbell making sausage that you might or might not like.

    • Pork tenderloin bacon, man. It’ll change your whole perspective on shit. (From the Original Pancake house on the east side of Milwaukee, WI.)

      • accur81, i know i would love it. but i just kicked diabetes and high blood pressure to the curb. i’m med free and plan on staying that way.

  3. These pigs will never be eradicated in the US but to substantially reduce their numbers a bounty, which would offset the cost of private hunters killing them would be a big step forward.
    I know, nobody has the money for such a program, an increase in license fees would help but again, nobody wants that either.
    If left to the Govt. Pig numbers will only continue to increase

  4. In Ye Olde Days, pigs used to be called “mortgage busters” by bankers who lent to farmers because of the economics of pig reproduction and their omnivore diets.

    Put that reproduction and diet out into the wild and you have a formula for environmental destruction on a scale not seen before.

    The city slickers who are anti-hunting better get used to seeing lots and lots of pigs being hunted and killed, because people who are proper stewards of the land (ie, not city slickers) simply will not tolerate what pigs do to a farm or ranch.

  5. All proper hunting helps manage game and wildlife (and should be strongly encouraged), but that’s not why hunters hunt. They hunt for the experience, the tradition, the meat, a sense of accomplishment, the excitement, the feeling of self-sufficiency and a lot of other good reasons. Managing the ecosphere is a wonderful side benefit.

    Take a kid hunting and see what happens to both of you. Neither of you will regret it.

      • Sorry if that sounded sarcastic: it was not. Tone doesn’t always translate like I intended it.

        I’ll be taking a new 16 year old out to his first deer hunt in WI on private land that has been in the family for nearly 100 years. On my first deer season, I got a 8 point buck, and I’ll never forget it.

  6. pigs are terrible animals that destroy crops and property.

    I knew they killed people, pets, and destroyed property, but I had no idea the police had taken to destroying farmers crops too!

  7. I find it absolutely fascinating that a farm raised hog released (or escaped) in to the wild will, in a matter of weeks, go feral, growing dark coarse hair and tusks. The escape of hogs engineered for size is likely what is responsible for the Hogzilla outbreak in Georgia. Having met a 300 poung 4H project pig, I shudder to think of something three times that size.

    • FYI, Mark N., the original so-called “Hogzilla” was genetically tested and found to be a wild boar / feral pig hybrid, aged about seven years. “Hybrid vigor” might partially explain his unusual size. He wasn’t as big as the hunter origionally claimed, but he was a damn big animal just the same. His tusks were so large that they had curled back on themselves to form a circle. And since he roamed around makin’ bacon for quite a long time, there are probably a whole bunch of Hogzilla Juniors and Juniorettes out there.

  8. Alright Nick! Totally unfair!!!!
    We got to get out to the lone star state soon and get some bacon!!!!
    In CA for some reason they have licenses now and you tag them even though they are varmints. Really odd.

    • But its always open season in California, there is no bag limit, and the tags are a whopping $21.34. Those with the big game endorsement on a lifetime license get 5 tags included…

      For bowhunters, there are even some ‘no hunting’ areas with free draws for pig hunting (e.g. Lake Sonoma).

      I do think Fish & Game policy should be extermination of those @#)(@*#)(* creatures [1], but overall, the policy really is pretty close to “JUST SHOOT EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THOSE BLEEDING THINGS, just be sure to take em home and eat em…”

      [1] Every environmentalist in the back woods should have a hunting license and a pig tag…

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