Black Arch Holsters Weekend Photo Caption Contest


Last week’s winner of a brand spanking new Black Arch Holster was…Jim. Enter the best caption for this pic in the comments by Sunday at midnight and you’ll have yourself a new carry rig for your gun, too.



  1. avatar me says:

    This one is broken, i get a discount, right?

  2. avatar jwm says:

    That’s not a gun. This, this is a gun.

  3. avatar jwm says:

    “Boss, jwm called. Said he’d need his rack of Tommy guns for this weekend.”

  4. avatar jwm says:

    “Tokyo PD just called. Asked if we had anything to stop a Gojira. What’s a Gojira? Doesn’t matter. This will stop anything.”

    1. avatar Ing says:

      You can’t stop Gojira.

  5. avatar James69 says:

    One, Tactical Silenced, Top loading Model 10 with stock. Check.

  6. avatar DrewR says:

    All right, but do you have anything bigger?

  7. Ya know you could attach the attach the barrel to the stock using a couple of removable pins…

  8. avatar Ing says:

    This is my rifle, this is my gun…

  9. avatar Cliff H says:

    No, I asked for one with the shoulder thingy that goes up, not with the barrel thingy that goes down.

  10. avatar kevin says:

    Four, yeah, I’ll take four of these.

  11. avatar Mecha75 says:


  12. avatar jwm says:

    So that’s what an arsenal looks like. The news has been lying to me for years.

  13. avatar imrambi says:

    Got that serial number? Good! Let’s make sure this walks across the border.

  14. avatar Rusty Chains says:

    cool toys!

  15. avatar CCDWGuy says:

    I want one of the one’s on the bottom left with enough ammo to hold off the ‘revenuer’s”.

  16. avatar Captain O says:

    “Hillary won’t like these”!

    “Do you have a ‘cross draw’ holster for this”?

    “It may stop my mother-in-law, then again…”.

  17. avatar tsbhoa.p.jr says:

    “tab ‘a’, slot ‘b’… dang it i can’t make heads or tales of this. jameson, go find me a six year old child.”

  18. avatar ^Sammy says:

    There is only 1 shell per box for that one.

  19. avatar strych9 says:

    “I found it! I finally found it!”

    “No Bob, that thing goes down .”

    “Oh, so you’re supposed to hold it this way!”

    “Yeeeesh, can you guys believe the FNG’s we get around here?”

    -Employee conversation at a Gander Mountain gun department

  20. avatar Frank says:

    Hey Bob, cab you believe this was turned in at the last buyback? Too bad it will be destroyed.

    Destroyed, naw Jim, this one goes to the chief’s collection.

  21. avatar jwm says:

    This one will be used in the next Bond film.

  22. avatar tsbhoa.p.jr says:

    “and two more of jack’s havana’s in this one.”

  23. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    “It’s an 88 magnum. Shoots through schools”

    1. avatar Timmy! says:

      DAMN IT! Tom beat me to it.

      (That’s not a contest entry, it’s a legitimate bitch.)

      1. avatar tsbhoa.p.jr says:

        also works as a fine entry…

  24. avatar Vitsaus says:

    “They are all great, but can you make it so they take Glock mags?”

  25. avatar jwm says:

    This one is in the inventory under “Hillary’s Penis Enhancer.”

  26. avatar jwm says:

    They didn’t need a bigger boat. This is what they needed.

  27. Wow, Rorschach really didn’t want his picture taken I guess.

  28. avatar SouthAl says:

    “Pardon me, do you have any gray poupon?”

    1. avatar Do I Need A Touch Of Gray For Men says:

      “Cali-Zim and Illini-Zim (same guy in real life) tool up for a big night of vigilantism”

      1. avatar You're touched in the head says:

        Stroke victims often spout repetitive nonsense syllables. Call an ambulance, quick!

  29. avatar Matty9 says:

    “I need a phased plasma rifle, something in the 40 kilowatt range.”

    “Just waht you see on the wall pal.”

    1. avatar Matty9 says:

      or has that arnold quote been banned, like how guitar stores are SICK of newbies trying to play Stairway to Heaven???

  30. avatar Patrick says:

    Do you think they’ll classify this as a Destructive Device?

  31. avatar skiff says:

    We’re taking inventory. Don’t bother to clean them. They will be torched and replaced with S&W 76.

  32. avatar SouthAl says:

    “It will take us all night to make sure all of these are unloaded.”

  33. avatar echo5bravo says:

    Yeah Bob.
    I think I broke it.
    Don’t worry Bob. I’ll make a note to put it in the box of shackles and revolvers from last week.

  34. avatar former water walker says:

    I’m Tommy-and here’s my guns?

  35. avatar Kyle Korcha says:

    In Mr Hoovers FBI, even the armorers wear suits and ties.

  36. avatar junkman says:

    Looks good, I’ll take a thousand, cash.

  37. avatar Kapeltam says:

    Okay, so that was 12 Thompsons, and two marshmallow launchers.

  38. avatar Mark N. says:

    President H. Cinton having been sworn in, civilian gun seizures under executive order proceed apace.

  39. avatar Silvio I says:

    If you can include the winning caption for the previous week, that would be great because Jim had too and both were good, but we don’t know which was the winner.

  40. avatar Lib lurker says:

    I don’t like to shoot them twice, you see. Feels dirty.

  41. avatar dh34 says:

    You know Bob, someday our kids might be humpin something like this through rice patties in some obscure Southeast Asian nation.

  42. avatar SouthAl says:

    Pretentious Preppers

    1. avatar SouthAl says:

      Pretentious preppers prepping pretentiously.

  43. avatar Rebecca says:

    Well, I’m an engineer. I can’t fix stupid, but I can fix what stupid does. But THIS is going to be a challenge.

  44. avatar Stogie says:

    “You know sir, real men don’t need to compensate for something, and they know how to assemble a rifle”

  45. avatar tsbhoa.p.jr says:

    “watch, it’ll be in the last one.”

  46. avatar Matt Spencer says:

    Wait… I can’t protect my family with only 2 rounds! What else do you have?

  47. avatar tsbhoa.p.jr says:

    “it’s exactly what i asked for! okay, for my second wish, you’re gonna need a pen…”

  48. avatar John R. P. La Voie says:

    We can keep this one – it’s not black and scary like those other guns.

  49. avatar Frank says:

    Ok how do you spell it?

    J I m e n e z

  50. avatar Dave S says:

    “Damnit Carl! That was gonna be a riot to shoot. 9 demerits.”

  51. avatar SouthAl says:

    Write this down George, “one is none and two is one.”

    1. avatar Sabrewolfe says:

      Nice, lol.

  52. avatar Maureen Gyory says:

    Dear diary, We are ready to Rock N’ Roll!

  53. avatar SouthAl says:

    An inside view of “Tater’s Gun Store” in Southwest Georgia.

  54. avatar Stateisevil says:

    Sir, as these repeaters compliment your 1911 pistol so well, can I interest you in any leather carrying cases?

  55. avatar DrewR55 says:

    “What do you mean Even this isn’t on the approved list for California?”

  56. avatar GunTotinDem says:

    I’m Harry Potterfield and thank you for your business.

  57. avatar uncommon_sense says:

    That there is what we affectionately call a BFG Mr. Jones.

  58. avatar Aaron says:

    and this is the thing that goes up.

  59. avatar Ing says:

    So this is where they keep all the Shoulder Things That Go Up.

  60. avatar CJ says:

    “It can shoot soda cans, or 40 Mike Mikes”.

  61. avatar Harold says:

    Who stuffed all these Benghazi emails in there?

  62. avatar Sabrewolfe says:

    I say, this looks like just the thing for drone season. Order me a dozen.

  63. avatar Marcus (Aurelius) Payne says:

    Yep, the numbers match. How in hell do you keep winning these raffles, ed?

  64. avatar Ted says:

    I’m sorry sir, but the sign clearly states,’you break it, you buy it.’

  65. avatar David says:

    Here’s my phone number. Let’s get them together this weekend for a play date!

  66. avatar Malcolm says:

    Does this one have enough unique features that we can ban it?
    Well…’s a gun.
    That’s good enough, add it to the list….

  67. avatar Penetty says:

    You ever clean these guns, Joe? The fouling in this barrel is uglier than your suit.

  68. avatar George Papadopolis says:

    No fly list:
    Mr. J.T. Thompson, CHECK
    Mr. J.M. Browning, CHECK
    The Queen will be so proud of us……………….

  69. avatar Danilushka Ozera says:

    “It is actually pretty ineffective as a firearm compared to the Tommie Gun, but it looks so scary that we’ll ban these first.”

  70. avatar Alan Esworthy says:

    I’ve already got an 8 gauge rifle. Do you have anything in 2 gauge?

  71. avatar George Papadopolis says:

    That’s it Larry! You got it dude, less than 10 parts!
    With the addition of the thumbhole stock and TAPCO trigger, this Russian 2GA shotgun is now 922r compliant.

  72. avatar EJQ says:

    “Yes, I agree. This accessorizes this suit beautifully. I’ll take it.”

  73. avatar jwm says:

    “You really weren’t happy to see me. That really was a gun in your pocket.”

  74. avatar Pete says:

    Ok, now that you have the pencil and paper ready, write this down…picatinny quad rail, flashlight, red laser, green laser, Acog, EO Tech, foregrip, bi pod, back up sights, whistle, signal mirror, bayonet, back up bayonet, heart rate monitor, bottle opener. That should do it. For now.

  75. avatar Tom D says:

    “Yes, I’ll take this one, and 2 of those Tommy guns.”

  76. avatar navillus says:

    Vice President Joe Biden is going to be sooo happy when I tell him I found a gun that only goes “Pew” and not “Pew, Pew, Pew!”

  77. avatar pieslapper says:

    You’ll need a bespoke rifle to go with your bespoke suit.

  78. avatar Jason says:

    No, the shoulder thingey stays put. The tubey thingey goes down.

  79. avatar pieslapper says:

    Lack of a silver spoon has set you on a certain path but you needn’t stay on it. If you’re prepared to adapt and learn you can transform.

  80. avatar John says:

    “Black… holds more than 10 rounds… check… OK, we can ban all those”. “Bob, what’s the next description on the list so we can ban this one?”

  81. avatar navillus says:

    “Can you imagine how stoned we’d get shotgunning dope out of this huge frigging barrel?”

    “Way ahead of you, partner- my shopping list so far, ‘the gun, two dime bags of weed, a lighter, some Cool Ranch Doritos, & a shitload of Slim Jims.’ Am I missing anything?”

  82. avatar LHW says:

    We’re gonna need more fire power to raid the Clinton Foundation.

  83. avatar Soccerchainsaw says:

    You broke it, you bought it buddy. I’ll write up a receipt for ya….

  84. avatar jwm says:

    There’s a wheeled carriage that goes with that.

  85. avatar Chazbo says:

    “So I took my Snakecharmer .410, stuffed a couple of viagra down the barrel, and…voila!”

  86. avatar pieslapper says:

    “Mmm… needs more cowbell.”

  87. avatar pieslapper says:

    “Oh that’s OK, every Hi-Point comes with a lifetime warranty.”

  88. avatar tsbhoa.p.jr says:

    “it’s my wife’s turn to host her bridge group. you think this tear gas might do the trick?”

  89. avatar bobby b says:

    “Says right here, it’s a pistol so long as you don’t intend to hold it up to your shoulder.”

  90. avatar pieslapper says:

    Can I get it with a Sig brace?

  91. avatar pieslapper says:

    “Does it come with a. 30 caliber clip to disperse 30 bullets in half a second?”

  92. avatar pieslapper says:

    “Wow. Royal Nonesuch has really stepped up his game.”

  93. avatar Ken says:

    40MM, no flash suppressor, no magazine, thumb hole stock, California Compliant Jerry Brown!

  94. avatar Claymore says:

    “Nolan, what part of Ireland did your folks come from?”

    “Delancey Street, thank you.”

  95. avatar Lance F says:

    What? It comes with a mail in rebate for potatoes?

  96. avatar jwm says:

    John Brownings last design before his passing. The .90 ACP.

  97. avatar jwm says:

    “These 2 are shipping out to a customer in Texas. Last name Sam, first name Yosemite. Apparently he has trouble with a large, long eared varmint.”

  98. avatar Scott says:

    I told ya last week Coolidge kept a lot of heaters stashed at the White House!

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