Home Contest Black Arch Holsters Weekend Photo Caption Contest Contest Black Arch Holsters Weekend Photo Caption Contest By Dan Zimmerman - September 9, 2016 106 Facebook Twitter Pinterest WhatsApp Email ◀Previous Post Next Post▶ Last week’s winner of a brand spanking new Black Arch Holster was…Jim. Enter the best caption for this pic in the comments by Sunday at midnight and you’ll have yourself a new carry rig for your gun, too. ◀Previous Post Next Post▶ RELATED ARTICLESMORE FROM AUTHOR An Open Letter to Open Carriers An Actual Dream Gun…My Grandfather’s Hand-Me-Down Shotgun Today Is Your Last Chance to Win NSSF’s +One Gearbox Giveaway 106 COMMENTS This one is broken, i get a discount, right? Reply That’s not a gun. This, this is a gun. Reply “Boss, jwm called. Said he’d need his rack of Tommy guns for this weekend.” Reply “Tokyo PD just called. Asked if we had anything to stop a Gojira. What’s a Gojira? Doesn’t matter. This will stop anything.” Reply You can’t stop Gojira. Reply One, Tactical Silenced, Top loading Model 10 with stock. Check. Reply All right, but do you have anything bigger? Reply Ya know you could attach the attach the barrel to the stock using a couple of removable pins… Reply This is my rifle, this is my gun… Reply No, I asked for one with the shoulder thingy that goes up, not with the barrel thingy that goes down. Reply Four, yeah, I’ll take four of these. Reply Heaven Reply So that’s what an arsenal looks like. The news has been lying to me for years. Reply Got that serial number? Good! Let’s make sure this walks across the border. Reply cool toys! Reply I want one of the one’s on the bottom left with enough ammo to hold off the ‘revenuer’s”. Reply “Hillary won’t like these”! “Do you have a ‘cross draw’ holster for this”? “It may stop my mother-in-law, then again…”. Reply “tab ‘a’, slot ‘b’… dang it i can’t make heads or tales of this. jameson, go find me a six year old child.” Reply There is only 1 shell per box for that one. Reply “I found it! I finally found it!” “No Bob, that thing goes down .” “Oh, so you’re supposed to hold it this way!” “Yeeeesh, can you guys believe the FNG’s we get around here?” -Employee conversation at a Gander Mountain gun department Reply Hey Bob, cab you believe this was turned in at the last buyback? Too bad it will be destroyed. Destroyed, naw Jim, this one goes to the chief’s collection. Reply This one will be used in the next Bond film. Reply “and two more of jack’s havana’s in this one.” Reply “It’s an 88 magnum. Shoots through schools” https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Hd-0F4v1C54 Reply DAMN IT! Tom beat me to it. (That’s not a contest entry, it’s a legitimate bitch.) Reply also works as a fine entry… Reply “They are all great, but can you make it so they take Glock mags?” Reply This one is in the inventory under “Hillary’s Penis Enhancer.” Reply They didn’t need a bigger boat. This is what they needed. Reply Wow, Rorschach really didn’t want his picture taken I guess. Reply “Pardon me, do you have any gray poupon?” Reply “Cali-Zim and Illini-Zim (same guy in real life) tool up for a big night of vigilantism” Reply Stroke victims often spout repetitive nonsense syllables. Call an ambulance, quick! Reply -Customer- “I need a phased plasma rifle, something in the 40 kilowatt range.” -Clerk- “Just waht you see on the wall pal.” Reply or has that arnold quote been banned, like how guitar stores are SICK of newbies trying to play Stairway to Heaven??? Reply Do you think they’ll classify this as a Destructive Device? Reply We’re taking inventory. Don’t bother to clean them. They will be torched and replaced with S&W 76. Reply “It will take us all night to make sure all of these are unloaded.” Reply Wayne? Yeah Bob. I think I broke it. Don’t worry Bob. I’ll make a note to put it in the box of shackles and revolvers from last week. Reply I’m Tommy-and here’s my guns? Reply In Mr Hoovers FBI, even the armorers wear suits and ties. Reply Looks good, I’ll take a thousand, cash. Reply Okay, so that was 12 Thompsons, and two marshmallow launchers. Reply President H. Cinton having been sworn in, civilian gun seizures under executive order proceed apace. Reply If you can include the winning caption for the previous week, that would be great because Jim had too and both were good, but we don’t know which was the winner. Reply I don’t like to shoot them twice, you see. Feels dirty. Reply You know Bob, someday our kids might be humpin something like this through rice patties in some obscure Southeast Asian nation. Reply Pretentious Preppers Reply Pretentious preppers prepping pretentiously. Reply Well, I’m an engineer. I can’t fix stupid, but I can fix what stupid does. But THIS is going to be a challenge. Reply “You know sir, real men don’t need to compensate for something, and they know how to assemble a rifle” Reply “watch, it’ll be in the last one.” Reply Wait… I can’t protect my family with only 2 rounds! What else do you have? Reply “it’s exactly what i asked for! okay, for my second wish, you’re gonna need a pen…” Reply We can keep this one – it’s not black and scary like those other guns. Reply Ok how do you spell it? J I m e n e z Reply “Damnit Carl! That was gonna be a riot to shoot. 9 demerits.” Reply Write this down George, “one is none and two is one.” Reply Nice, lol. Reply Dear diary, We are ready to Rock N’ Roll! Reply An inside view of “Tater’s Gun Store” in Southwest Georgia. Reply Sir, as these repeaters compliment your 1911 pistol so well, can I interest you in any leather carrying cases? Reply “What do you mean Even this isn’t on the approved list for California?” Reply I’m Harry Potterfield and thank you for your business. Reply That there is what we affectionately call a BFG Mr. Jones. Reply and this is the thing that goes up. Reply So this is where they keep all the Shoulder Things That Go Up. Reply “It can shoot soda cans, or 40 Mike Mikes”. Reply Who stuffed all these Benghazi emails in there? Reply I say, this looks like just the thing for drone season. Order me a dozen. Reply Yep, the numbers match. How in hell do you keep winning these raffles, ed? Reply I’m sorry sir, but the sign clearly states,’you break it, you buy it.’ Reply Here’s my phone number. Let’s get them together this weekend for a play date! Reply Does this one have enough unique features that we can ban it? Well…..it’s a gun. That’s good enough, add it to the list…. Reply You ever clean these guns, Joe? The fouling in this barrel is uglier than your suit. Reply No fly list: Mr. J.T. Thompson, CHECK Mr. J.M. Browning, CHECK The Queen will be so proud of us………………. Reply “It is actually pretty ineffective as a firearm compared to the Tommie Gun, but it looks so scary that we’ll ban these first.” Reply I’ve already got an 8 gauge rifle. Do you have anything in 2 gauge? Reply That’s it Larry! You got it dude, less than 10 parts! With the addition of the thumbhole stock and TAPCO trigger, this Russian 2GA shotgun is now 922r compliant. Reply “Yes, I agree. This accessorizes this suit beautifully. I’ll take it.” Reply “You really weren’t happy to see me. That really was a gun in your pocket.” Reply Ok, now that you have the pencil and paper ready, write this down…picatinny quad rail, flashlight, red laser, green laser, Acog, EO Tech, foregrip, bi pod, back up sights, whistle, signal mirror, bayonet, back up bayonet, heart rate monitor, bottle opener. That should do it. For now. Reply “Yes, I’ll take this one, and 2 of those Tommy guns.” Reply Vice President Joe Biden is going to be sooo happy when I tell him I found a gun that only goes “Pew” and not “Pew, Pew, Pew!” Reply You’ll need a bespoke rifle to go with your bespoke suit. Reply No, the shoulder thingey stays put. The tubey thingey goes down. Reply Lack of a silver spoon has set you on a certain path but you needn’t stay on it. If you’re prepared to adapt and learn you can transform. Reply “Black… holds more than 10 rounds… check… OK, we can ban all those”. “Bob, what’s the next description on the list so we can ban this one?” Reply “Can you imagine how stoned we’d get shotgunning dope out of this huge frigging barrel?” “Way ahead of you, partner- my shopping list so far, ‘the gun, two dime bags of weed, a lighter, some Cool Ranch Doritos, & a shitload of Slim Jims.’ Am I missing anything?” Reply We’re gonna need more fire power to raid the Clinton Foundation. Reply You broke it, you bought it buddy. I’ll write up a receipt for ya…. Reply There’s a wheeled carriage that goes with that. Reply “So I took my Snakecharmer .410, stuffed a couple of viagra down the barrel, and…voila!” Reply “Mmm… needs more cowbell.” Reply “Oh that’s OK, every Hi-Point comes with a lifetime warranty.” Reply “it’s my wife’s turn to host her bridge group. you think this tear gas might do the trick?” Reply “Says right here, it’s a pistol so long as you don’t intend to hold it up to your shoulder.” Reply Can I get it with a Sig brace? Reply “Does it come with a. 30 caliber clip to disperse 30 bullets in half a second?” Reply “Wow. Royal Nonesuch has really stepped up his game.” Reply 40MM, no flash suppressor, no magazine, thumb hole stock, California Compliant Jerry Brown! Reply “Nolan, what part of Ireland did your folks come from?” “Delancey Street, thank you.” Reply What? It comes with a mail in rebate for potatoes? Reply John Brownings last design before his passing. The .90 ACP. Reply “These 2 are shipping out to a customer in Texas. Last name Sam, first name Yosemite. Apparently he has trouble with a large, long eared varmint.” Reply I told ya last week Coolidge kept a lot of heaters stashed at the White House! Reply LEAVE A REPLY Cancel reply Please enter your comment! Please enter your name here You have entered an incorrect email address! Please enter your email address here Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email.