1. Reports of white male with gunshot wounds near corner of 45th and Washington, show ambulance responding. Oh…wait…no…its just Steve. Damn it, someone tell Steve to put on a shirt.

  2. Here we see our next case, Dick. He’s developed a curious form of stigmata known as d-bagmata.

  3. Year 2015:

    President Metrosexual has declared that all existing tattoos with images of guns, ammo, and bullet holes are not covered by the Bill of Rights and must be registered. Artists are now banned from creating any new violence themed tattoos.

  4. This is what happens on the South Side of Chicago when you don’t pay for your tattoos.

  5. No comment.

    Sorry. The bullet-hole tattos are just so bizarre. I can’t think of anything snarky to say about them.

  6. “The Itsy-Bitsy Spider crawled up the inked-up punk with deep-seated issues hidden behind a pseudo-masculine facade of animal totem body art and an attempt and indicating a fearless nature by mockery of fatal gunshot wounds…” I guess that doesn’t rhyme, huh?

  7. “Tis but a scratch.”

    -“A scratch? You been shot 5 times!”

    “No I haven’t.”

    -“Well what’s that?”

    “I’ve had worse.”

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