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Ban Vibrators!

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“A bomb squad blew up a briefcase and other suspicious items in a Pittsburgh man’s car Monday after he robbed a bank,” nbcnews.com reports. “With a sex toy. Specifically, a vibrator.” That’s the headline. Here are the ins and outs . . .

[Aaron] Stein was arrested after a PNC Bank in the Pittsburgh suburb of Crafton was robbed of an undisclosed amount of money Monday. Crafton Police Chief Mark Sumpter told NBC station WPXI of Pittsburgh that Stein “stated he had a bomb, showed the teller wires hanging out from his shirt and demanded cash.”

The robber drove off in a white Toyota, which was pulled over on a ramp to northbound Interstate 79 by Robinson Township police, Sumpter said.

Officers found money in a garbage bag, and beneath the front passenger seat, they found the device Stein is accused of having used in the bank robbery — “a makeshift box he made out of a box, black tape, vibrator and cellphone,” Sumpter said.

Clearly, we need to ban sex toys lest they be used for nefarious purposes.

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