Reading Ben Shotzberger’s review of the Hi-Point C9 yesterday, I was struck not by the gun’s reported unreliability. Or its, well, uninspired ergonomics. No, what hit me like a two-by-four between the eyes was how damned ugly that gun is. Bad design isn’t an accident. It doesn’t just happen. It’s achieved. Achievements like the butt-ugly C9 should be celebrated. And we’re just the people to do it . . .
We’ve all seen guns we’re sure were beaten with the ugly stick from the time they were first sketched on a bar napkin at 3:00 a.m. until they were shipped from the factory to our friendly local FFL. But picking the ugliest is like asking people who makes the best pizza. Everyone has his own opinion. Which is half the fun.
For instance, I think the Chiappa Rhino .357 with the 5″ barrel has a certain quirky, Dick Tracy steampunk kind of coolness to it.
On the other hand, I wouldn’t use the snubby Rhino to club a rat running loose in my kitchen. Yeesh. The point being, the difference between slick and sickening can be just that fine.
Now anyone can ugly up a perfectly nice looking heater with all kinds of garish paint jobs, aftermarket geegaws and cheap chotchkes.
There’s no accounting for taste. Some people will think just about anything looks good. Just look at the career of Kate Moss. No, what we’re looking for is true, profound grotesqueness here. The kind that runs straight through to the bone. Originally manufactured repugnance. Handguns, shotguns, rifles. Post your links and we’ll assemble a gallery of original stock loathsomeness for tomorrow.