Sure, he could have accomplished the same thing with glow sticks. But no. The time for glow sticks has come and gone. Dennis obviously woke up one morning recently, thought about all the guns in private ownership in this country and decided…no more Mr. Nice Guy.
Clearly taking his inspiration from the words of one of the great leaders of history, he decided he couldn’t fight this battle with conventional weapons. After all, that could take years and cost millions of lives. No, Dennis concluded, this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture on somebody’s part. And he’s just the man to do it.
So out come the candles. Except, as triblocal.com informs us, that won’t be without casualties either.
“Fire departments in the United States respond to a fire that was started by a candle every 34 minutes,” said Kevin Wiley, battalion chief with the Oak Park (IL) Fire Department.
We know you’re trying to make a point here, Dennis. But think of the firefighters and their families. And think of all of the other innocent bystanders who are bound to be the victims of senseless candle fires as a direct result of your selfish need to make a statement. And for God’s sake, think of the children.
Candles should remain in the hands of those who are qualified to use them. You – of all people – should know that. And that’s why your reckless disregard for safety in calling for this self-indulgent demonstration has earned you our Irresponsible Protest Organizer of the Day Award.