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You hope and pray you’ll never have to defend yourself or your home with deadly force. But you also want to be prepared if ever that eventuality rears its ugly head. And avoidance is always preferable where possible, right? Some people try to ward off the bad guys with prominent signs supplied by their alarm company. Others prefer a more, well, direct approach to deterrence. To wit, the above sign…

Sure, it’s direct. As the craftsman who sells them tells us,

Here is a nice engraved wood sign that will send a clear message to anyone who might want to break into your home. This engraved hand-painted Pine wood sign states “WE DON’T call 911. Obviously with the 45 Auto engraved pistol it would be a stupid thief who tries to rob your home.

This hand made, third-period-shop-class-quality warning affixed to your boundary fence may very well cause the occasional burglar to think twice. But if the worst should happen and you really do have to protect yourself, the sign could also provide an ambitious prosecutor – not to mention the home invader’s next of kin – with enough evidence as to your state of mind to keep you impoverished and tied up in court (if not jail) for years.

Moral of the story: you may have a ‘shoot, shovel and STFU’ attitude toward threats to your home and family, but advertising that fact can’t do you any good. If you want a sign to keep the BGs away – even if you don’t have an alarm – buy one that won’t also potentially put a Mercedes in your attorney’s driveway.

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  1. My take on this has always been “We have guns. Guns that you can easily sell for dope or use yourself. Wait until we leave, then help yourself.”

    Even in a safe, they’re not safe.

  2. You’ll get sued no matter how absurd the circumstances are. I just finished up as a defendant on a out of state (California) wrongful death suit; they dropped the suit. I didnt have the money to hire an attorney so I had to represent myself. 3 of my neighbors kids/nephews (aged mid to late 20s) decided they wanted to try to work an abandoned gold mine on my family’s property. They setup gas powered pumps, let them run for a while and then went down the shaft, quickly succumbing to the exhaust from their pumps. Aparently none of them ever heard of using a Canary, let alone real oxygen sensors. I went out there a year and a half ago for family matters, looked down the shaft, and saw a cheap plastic 12″ box fan at the bottom of a 30-40 foot shaft they thought would provide adequate ventilation. Their asshole parents wanted 1.5 million for their children’s unintentional suicide.

    • Not surprised since we live in a time where no matter what I do, its your fault whatever happens. We have a parental culture at the moment and self responsibility does not exist. It also does not help that trial lawyers also support this bs and give a lot of campaign funds to libs to prevent common sense legislation.

  3. That must be about the most stupid sign of that genre I have yet seen.

    If something really bad is going down of course calling 911 ASAP is the best way to CYA.

    After that, not running off with the mouth and calling a good lawyer may be a prudent thing to do.

    Your mileage may vary.

    • With a custom request, it could say that. Also, if it said that, if anyone wanted to use it to prosecute you, you could simply blow it off by saying that it means you are a gun enthusiast.

  4. How about a sign that says:

    Do not enter premises unless you have been vaccinated for Small Pox virus. Please wear surgical mask to reduce risk of breathing in virus. If you feel ill after visiting premises go immediately to Hospital Emergency Room.

  5. Your state of mind is always an issue in a homicide case, and it’s also an issue in your claim of self defense because the law of self defense in all 50 states requires that you had a reasonable belief that you faced imminent death or serious bodily injury. That opens the door to all evidence of your state of mind and if the prosecutor can convince the jury that your state of mind was one of malice, there is a simple explanation for what happens next. You’re toast.

    A jury wants to believe that you shot the bad guy as a last resort after all else had failed. If they believe that, they will likely send you home to your family. If the prosecutor believes he won’t be able to convince a hypothetical jury otherwise, you probably won’t ever be charged. This sign is good not only for putting a mercedes in your lawyer’s driveway but also for putting your butt in a prison cell.

    Blame the charlatan Jesse Ventura when he was governor of Minnesota for coining the phrase on the sign.

  6. It does not pay to advertise. If you have to shoot the bastard, then shoot the bastard, but don’t go all John McClane before, during or after. Yippie-ki-yay my a$$.

  7. It was suggested in an article to inform the police (when they finally arrive) that you respectfully would like to hold off giving a statement until after you have spoken with an attorney.

  8. If God forbid you have to defend yourself you better look remorseful as hell when the cops get there but when the detectives walk past a sign like this it will change the tone for the interview. I promise you they will ask what the deal with the sign is and it will be photographed. The newspaper will call you a gun nut, vigilante, extremist, and the criminal will be eulogized on the evening news by his grieving relations as a good kid just asking to use the phone to call a cab.

    Take the bumper sticker off your car that says “My idea of gun control is a firm grip” while your at it.

  9. How many burglars look specifically for firearms to steal? And how good of an idea is it to let everyone know that there are firearms in your home?

    Most theifs are gonna make sure you’re not home before they try and take your stuff. So in my opinion, compelling legal points aside, having a sign like that makes you MORE likely to have your home burglarized than anything else.


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