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Right now I’m feeling a little shaken not stirred.

Last week’s champ was pieslapper. This week’s most imaginative caption writer will get a True Brands magnetic gun mount to stow that pistol just about anywhere. Just enter your best work in the comments before Sunday at midnight to be eligible.

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    • “Welcome to Londonistan bruv, I iz needing to get da bus, spare a few bob!”

    • Mr, Bond, I am Dr. Nigel Smith from the Greater London STD Clinic. We’ve been expecting you for 30 years, you are finally coming with us.

      • He introduces himself as “Bond. James Bond.” But we here at the Greater London STD clinic refer to him as “The Giver.” And we have sworn a solemn oath that he shall give no more.

  1. What I wouldn’t give for one of those sarcastic “back at the shooter” barreled guns right now…

  2. “I’m about to find out if it takes Glock magazines.”

  3. When budget cuts go to far. Bond had to turn in his Walther and this was his replacement.

  4. No pressure! Just the fate of the free world rests on this shot!
    And Olympic shooters think they have pressure! Harumph!

  5. Bond stood at the alter next to Moneypenny, unable to decide which option was preferable.

  6. “I know what you’re thinking. Did you fire one shot or did you fire none? Well, since your weapon is a one-shot dueling pistol you’ll have to ask yourself one question – do you feel lucky Mr. Bond? Well, do you?”

  7. I know I only have this old cap & ball pistol, but I’ve got Glock on my mind!

  8. “No, Mr. Bond, Ms. Galore had a previous engagement. I only told you Pussy was here to get you into my trap.”

  9. I found this old piece whilst digging around in the barn at Skyfall. It’s been loaded since 1823. If I drop the hammer, it will quite likely explode and kill us both. Now why don’t you be a good lad and hand that pistol over to me?

  10. “Sorry, Mr. Bond, your cunning linguistics won’t get you out of this one.”

  11. Don’t bring a cap 🧢 and ball ⚾ to a gun fight Mr. Bond.
    Due to restrictive UK gun laws, special agents will now only be allowed antiques.

  12. “It had to be a Glock. Just had to be. Right now I’m hating that world class Glock reliability. Even your average arch-villian can shoot those with success.” Crap…

  13. And it was at that point that the range officer closed his eyes, let his arms fall to his sides, and let out a sigh of exasperation.

  14. “Hit the target, Mr. Craig, and you win a stuffed pink unicorn!”
    “Miss… and the judge behind you gives a different sort of prize… no pressure.”

  15. “Joke’s on you. If I needed my brain, I would have brought a better gun.”

  16. This was just two of the eighteen forming the circle. All waiting for the timer to go off.

  17. “I was born with two right hands and an eight-foot left arm, so I do get depressed sometimes– but playing pirates with my pal Friday cheers me up and gives me hope that one day, we WILL get off this damn island.”


  18. Bet you thought I was alone. Shoot me and the laser white dot on your friend turns red. By the way, you can’t see it, there is one on you also. Remember the title: Live another day.

  19. “Wait, this is a Bond flick? I signed up for ‘Highlander’. Get the armorer and costume mistress….”

  20. That moment when you realize that the government isn’t really there to protect you or your rights!

  21. A pictorial explanation on why citizens should have access to the same guns as the government.

  22. “You can have my gun when you pry it from ….” Oh, wait, that may not be the right thing to say at this moment.

  23. “If you really must put that against my head please use the GEN 5. The chamfered slide is much more comfortable.”

  24. “I must say Mr. Craig that I rather liked the Remington Steele fellow better for your role, he exhibited a bit more panache.”

  25. “I can tell from the feeling of that slide that you’re a man of breeding and taste. The last wanker that tried to kill me used a bloody Hi-point!”

  26. “Come on everybody pick up a gun, we only need a few more for a circular firing squad”.

  27. “You’re giving new meaning to the term ‘Metal-Head'”.

  28. “Damn cap & ball with my PPK I could shoot multiple ‘loads'”

  29. The wife says:

    “Pop Goes The Weasel”.

  30. “If the ‘Bang!’ flag doesn’t pop out of this barrel when I pull the trigger I’m fucked”.

  31. “Damn multiculturalism, ‘Q’ did this to me so ‘M’ could appoint a black 007”

  32. “Freeze! Family Services Agent! We have a warrant! You are under arrest for 347 counts of unpaid child support!”

  33. “When you’re about to win an arguement with your wife and she brings up something you did 5 years ago.”

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