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[h/t Tom in Oregon]

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  1. Scooby dooby dooby doo, I see you, pretending you’ve got a sniper. But you’re not fooling me cause I can see *BANG*

  2. Look, I know you hate that Watts lady too but we are here because she is a cat lover. Now take the damn shot.

  3. Sniper: I can’t afford a bipod, cause i spent all my money on this stock.

    Dog: It’s true, this spotting scope is mine.

  4. I cant believe Fred and Daphne fell for the stupid stoner disguise. Alright Scoob now lets do what we do best. Then lets get a sandwich, hunting zombies makes my tummy rumble.

  5. “Hey Brad… do you see that yellow cat by the tall cottonwood that’s way in the back? TAKE THE SHOT, BAYBEE!”

  6. After crapping in his food dish in response to his incessant midnight howling, Arsenault, the neighbor’s Siamese, grossly underestimated the lengths Rosco would go to in retaliation.

  7. Hey Mall Ninja, while we’re having a bonding moment, I’ve been meaning to tell you……err ……you know where my tongues been right?

  8. “Shooter ready…”
    “Send it…”
    “Uh. A little high and left.”
    “Adjusting. Ready.”
    “Send it.”
    “Yeah. That’s a hit… Can I PLEASE go get the ball now?”

  9. ADA Sponsored Blind Precision Shooting Nationals…

    Taking ‘seeing eye dogs’ to a whole new level…

  10. German Shepherd: You missed again you nimrod. Give me the rifle, even I can do better than that!

  11. Woof, woof, wooooof, grrrr, woof, woof! (Loosely translated, “not sure how this will get Timmy out of the well, but I’ll roll with it for a bit.”)

    • Ellen DeGeneres once did a whole bit on that, marveling on how good the people were at figuring out what Lassie was trying to say.
      “What’s that, Lassie?”
      “Timmy fell in the well?”
      “He wants us to bring a ladder”
      “An aluminum ladder?”
      “A 32-foot aluminum extension ladder?”
      (Copyright Ellen DeGeneres, used without permission, under the ‘fair use’ provision.)

  12. George Jetson and Astro, before marrying, before flying cars, before kids, and before Spacely Spockets…

  13. Once upon a time, a handsome man asked an extremely beautiful woman to marry him. The woman said NO, and the man lived happily ever after. He rode motorcycles and dated skinny long-legged full-breasted women and hunted and fished and raced cars and went to stripper bars and dated ladies half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Patron tequila.

    He never heard bitching and he never paid child support or alimony. He banged San Diego Charger cheerleaders and kept his house and guns and ate spam and potato chips and beans and farted whenever he wanted to and never got cheated on while he was at work. All his friends and family thought he was totally cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and he left the toilet seat up.

    He got to go shooting with his favorite dog anytime he wanted to, dress like a 70’s bush mercenary and grow his hair long.

    —The End

  14. Man: “I know you don’t like watching your tennis balls going to bits, but you chewed up all my cardboard.”

    Dog: “Oh, no. It’s cool, dude…” And don’t be surprised if you find a nice “present” in your boots again tomorrow morning, fuckface.

  15. Weapons hot. I said shoot that bitch.
    Following a demonstration of ability, the AKC formally recognized the German Spotter as a separate breed.

  16. Spotter Dirk Diggler comments to Ralph his shooter,
    “I know you think that Watts broad is a bitch, but hey, that’s ok with me, if you know what I mean!”

  17. Sparky was sick of his friends being collateral damage, so he took the fight to the cops on their own terms…

  18. Caving in to pressure from sponsors, Hickok45 and Gunner tweak the show’s format to appeal to the growing tacticool demographic.

  19. OK, 300 yards, the fat bastard in the yellow shirt, that’s the guy who used to pull me around with a choke chain.

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