America’s newspaper of record, the Babylon Bee, covered the Virginia Gun Rights rally today. In the Bee’s special way, they reported not on the peaceful crowds of supremely polite people. Instead, they reported on the mainstream media’s disappointment over a lack of violence and bloodshed at the event.
Yes, so much for the mass media’s fake-news narrative that American gun owners bringing guns to a rally couldn’t possibly happen without bloodshed and mayhem.
Directly from the Babylon Bee’s pages:
Media Offers Thoughts And Prayers That Someone Would Start Some Violence At Gun Rights Rally
U.S.—Somber members of the press offered their thoughts and prayers that someone would start some violence at the gun rights rally in Virginia today.
Reporters expressed their grief and condolences as the violence they hyped has so far failed to materialize.
“Nobody has so much as fired a shot. This is an unbelievable tragedy,” said one teary-eyed MSNBC reporter, clearly caught up in the anguish of the moment. “It’s tragic that we live in a country where reporters who are just minding their own business trying to push a narrative can have everything ripped away from them in an instant when protesters refuse to shoot at people.”
A CBS News reporter called for a moment of silence live on the air. “Let’s all take a minute and cry out to a non-specific deity of our choice that any second now, a miraculous shooting would occur.” When it did not occur, she began weeping and gnashing her teeth before ripping her suit jacket in despair. “WHY, GOD, WHY!?!”
As most savvy Americans realize, the Babylon Bee produces news satire. But in today’s topsy-turvy world, their headlines can often get confused with the truth.
Like their recent headline following the American mission that took out Iranian terrorist General Soleimani:
Democrats Call For Flags To Be Flown At Half-Mast To Grieve Death Of Soleimani
WASHINGTON, D.C.—At a press conference held on Capitol Hill Friday, mourning Democrat leaders called for flags to be flown half-mast to honor the death of Qasem Soleimani.
Flags were spotted flying at half-mast around the country, notably at The Washington Post, The New York Times, and in front of several celebrities’ homes. The celebrities went out and bought an American flag for the first time just to fly it at half-mast for this important time of grief.
That story had as much or more social media engagement than real “top stories” from the NY Times and CNN, according to one CNN reporter. And that didn’t sit well with him.
To put this in perspective, this is the same number of engagements the top NY Times and CNN stories on Facebook had over the past week.
A lot of people sharing this “satirical” story on Facebook don’t know it is satire. https://t.co/HnDjuqw2si
— Donie O’Sullivan (@donie) January 5, 2020
Obviously CNN’s Donie underestimates the intelligence of the average American. Or perhaps he overestimates his own intelligence.
Furthermore, it is obvious that he has no sense of humor. Because frankly, it’s hard not to laugh at the Bee’s headlines.
Meanwhile, today’s very successful rally in Virginia did go off peacefully, with tens of thousands of American patriots clogging the streets in downtown Richmond to let the Old Dominion State pols know that gun owners that they aren’t surrendering their rights or their guns to would-be tyrants.