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It’s never good to live in an echo chamber. Whether it’s religious beliefs, political beliefs, or your strongly-held views on barbecue vs. grilling (FYI, barbecuing involves cooking and smoking meats over a low heat for an extended period of time and grilling is what you do to hamburgers and hotdogs on the 4th of July and if you disagree then you’re wrong). So for the sake of journalistic balance, here is Jim Jefferies (an Australian comedian) explaining why the Second Amendment is a bad idea . . .

Some facts can’t be denied. Since the Port Arthur massacre in 1996 and the subsequent gun ban, there has not been a single mass shooting in Australia. There was, of course the Quaker’s Hill Nursing Home Fire that killed 21 people, but no mass shootings. Well, except the 2011 Hectorville Siege where three people were killed and three wounded by a deranged gunman. But that’s not very many. There was, of course, an increase in robberies, rapes, and murders following the ban, but those have begun to come down over time.

Jeffries says:

“The main [argument for guns] is ‘I need it for protection. I need to protect me. I need to protect my family.’ Really? Is that why they’re called assault rifles? Is it? Never heard of these fucking protection rifles you speak of.”

Maybe we should start referring to ARs as “Protection Rifles.”

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87 COMMENTS

    • Of course not. Anti-gun people generally have no knowledge of firearms what so ever. If they did, they wouldn’t be anti-gun.

      • But wait, isn’t this whole rant anti-gun circular logic. He is saying that they wouldn’t be called “assault rifles” if they were for protection, but they wouldn’t be called “assault rifles” at all if not for someone like him calling them that. Gun advocates call them “rifles”. Only Anti-gun-ers came up with some kind of arbitrary system that rifles that include certain features magically become a new special class of rifle designed for “assault”.
        No company manufactures them as “assault rifles”.
        Their owners don’t see them as “assault rifles”.
        Only this guy (and those like him) suppose that “assault rifles” are used to assault people.
        He wants to know where all the “protection rifles” are… I want to know how calling them “protection-“, “assault-“, or “pretty pretty pony-” rifles has any effect on…. ANYTHING?

        • In the man’s defense, “sturmgewehrs” or “assault rifles” actually were developed specifically to allow infantry to rapidly assault a position with overwhelming quantity of firepower (compared to full-bore autoloaders, bolt guns, and SMGs of the day). Carbines like the M1 and M4, on the other hand, were developed with slightly more defensive priorities in mind (with obvious overlap between defensive and offensive use, of course) for more easily-ambushed urban occupation/peace keeping patrol jobs, now that there aren’t really front lines in the wars we fight.

          Guns aren’t inherently evil, but lets not delude ourselves into thinking they are something other than tools for inflicting harm on the target –in the case of service arms, this is obviously people. They are swords, not shields, whether used offensively or defensively, for good or ill. A rose by any name is just as thorny.

          Now, “assault weapons” truly is nothing more than a legal/propagandist figment; never formally codified in any military manner, and invented solely to demonize civilian rifles. All weapons are assault weapons; weapons are used to assail, as opposed to block or counter (which is what a shield is for).

        • “sturmgewehrs” or “assault rifles” actually were developed specifically to allow infantry to rapidly assault a position”
          Correct. What you left out is that “sturmgewehrs” literally translated as “storm rifle” was designed to storm position with more firepower is the form of:
          1. a caliber more powerful than the standard machine pistols(MP40s, stens, etc) in pistol calibers, yet less than that available in the full powered battle rifles of the day(.30-06, .303, 8mm Mauser). Thus the birth of the “intermediate” cartridge.
          2. a detachable magazine of more than standard capacity, more like the machine pistols.
          3. capability to fire on fully automatic.

          It is this third requirement that makes all the so called “assualt rifles” NOT one. AR15s lack the full auto position on their selector/safety, so they are NOT one. The M16, however IS.
          BUT, since full auto has ALREADY been banned since 1986, and to NO effect on the crime rate, the antis must come up with something else to complain about. Thus the invention of the misleading term assault “weapon”. Which, as you noted, is ridiculous in the extreme. But the ignorant don’t notice that, for one must have some knowledge in order to realize how extreme and disingenuous the antis positions actually are.

        • Ken, the select fire feature is available on a civilian owned rifle, you just have to pay $200 and put up with an intrusive group of government assholes going over your business, dragging their feet on the paperwork, losing the paperwork and potentially trying to arrest you, etc. Thus, “Assault rifles” have been strictly controlled and in some places banned since 1934… not 1986. 1986 was when they banned new registration of civilian automatic firearms. There was a deal a while back where someone found one of the German machine guns that Alvin York captured in WWI just hanging out in an old attic in Tennessee, and the fed was demanding it be destroyed till it was handed over to a museum, since it had not been registered prior to 1986.

        • I am sorry to inform you that that is incorrect. The National Firearms Act of 1934 did NOT “ban” full autos, it only established the Federal Registration system and the 200 dollar transfer tax that you mentioned. It regulated full autos, but did not ban them.
          The FOPA of 1986 BANNED all newly produced full autos, freezing the number at the then current level. New full autos are ONLY available for purchase to military, law enforcement, and certain LLCs. No citizens need apply, it is not possible for them. That is a BAN.
          You are correct about the drop in auto sears to convert ARs to full auto, but they also were banned in 1984. In order to buy one, you must find one that was tax stamped prior to 1984 that someone wishes to sell on the secondary market. And, since they can never be replaced, except by this same means, the number is forever declining, and the prices forever rising, until they are now price prohibitive, just like a real preban M16 which now runs around 30 grand. And climbing.
          But if that ban was scrapped, they would drop right back to the price of an AR. This is the reason why opposition to that comes from the full auto owners themselves. They have a vested interest in supporting the artificially inflated prices of their so-called “investments…

      • No, how could anyone who disagrees with your views possibly know anything? And if they knew what you knew, they would surely agree! Tell me, have you ever left your basement, other than to buy more ammo? Because if I wanted a model of what solipsism looks like, you might make the perfect model.

    • When the government/police puts out a bid for M-16 rifles or semi-automatic AR variant, they call them “personal defense rifles”. So, there is one place that description comes from.
      Modern Sporting Rifles is also a common name for them.

      • Don’t forget the somewhat famous DHS report that declared the m16 to be appropriate for personal defense.

      • Didn’t know this, is there a source where I can read more about it? Would be interesting if say the big city police departments use that term as they are the law enforcement who support gun control.

  1. I ran into this the other day online. Someone posted an anti-gun rant, to which I calmly, and probably foolishly, responding using facts. Which led to a real sh*tstorm, immediately containing ad hominem attacks and questions like “Which militia do you belong to” and opinion that gun owners are all just waiting for the chance to kill someone. I replied politely to a few messages, but it was like trying to argue with barking dogs. A few people posted supportive messages, such as the amount of violent crime in Australia, coincidentally, going through the roof even after a gun ban.

    • Whenever asked about the militia i belong to, I say my army of one…with the sole mission to protect and defend my family and my home from all threats.

  2. but seriously, speaking on the chart RF provided, what happened in 2001 that caused a sudden drop in all types of robberies?

  3. He’s Australian. What do you expect from a country that’s so rabidly anti-gun it punished a couple of athletes that posted a picture to Facebook of them holding guns when they were in the U.S.

    • Well, Nelson, I laughed with him. Jeffferies was on a roll. I’m not sure I could have delivered a better “do’s and don’t’s of gun ownership” myself:

      1. For god’s sake, if you’re going shopping for an AR in Australia, leave the Bentley at home. Five minutes earlier a guy in an old jeep got one for AU$3,000. Of course they’re going to jack up the price when they catch on that you’re a rich entertainer with money to burn. I’d imagine it’s the same when you try to score weed.

      2. Your defensive gun’s locked in a safe? Your only defensive gun? At night? Well, even Scalia figured out how stupid that would be.

      3. You were attacked by invasive burglars who threatened to rape your girl-friend, and you were caught naked, but you concluded you’re glad you didn’t have a gun handy because, well…’naked’? Where the f’k do you keep your condoms? Next time put a gun next to the condom. Simple.

      4. Stuck in a country that’s terribly safe because…no guns? Same problem Piers Morgan had? Here’s a bright idea: Prove your cleverness by asserting two things at once. One, you hate guns. And, Two, you’re packing your bags immediately for the one country with more guns per capita than Switzerland, the place you spent last Christmas skiing. Brilliant.

      What is it about the U.S. that draws these guys? Does the U.S. just have the cheapest most abundant cocaine? Something draws these guys here like a cardboard box draws homeless drunks on a cold January night.

        • Exactly – every entertainer from overseas hopes to one day climb the ladder far enough to get that big break to go to the US. Jim Jefferies could make an OK living in Australia, but he had to come to the US to make the big bucks. U2 would have been a so-so cover band in Dublin with every member working second jobs or being on the dole if they chose to stay in Ireland. So they set their sights on the US.

          Funny, when I travel overseas, especially for work, I keep my more pointed commentary to myself. I mean, yeah, have your opinions, but to go off on a country which has graciously signed off of your work permits/visas so you could come here and make (potentially) millions of dollars, is ridiculous.

          Jim – I just cleaned my AR. It’s safely stored away now, with no mind of it’s own. There’s no evil in the gun, the evil is in the person who operates it.

          Australia need only look to the east to New Zealand. Culturally similar, their firearms laws are comparatively looser as compared to Australia. I haven’t heard of any massacres in NZ, have you?

        • Nah, I’m sticking to the “cheaper more abundant coke” guess. Or he really likes the diversity of American chicks, and hopes to get more laid, not just more paid. If Morgan or Jefferies really knew the value of a buck, they’d also realize the value of a little pistol or two. Or as Mick might say,

          “It’s only Filthy Lucre but I like it, like it, yes I do!” And I want to keep it. And no, the punk in the parking lot can’t take it at knife point. And the little pric& who just set off my burglar alarm can’t have the flatware, either. And we have lots of lawyers in America, not just pistols, because you can’t shoot the IRS. It’s too big and too fat to penetrate. But pistols are cheaper than lawyers, so start with a pistol.

          If Cosby’s son had had a flat tire and a pistol, not just a flat tire, things might have gone better for him. I’d advise the Cos himself on security, but it’s obviously too late. Comics. They’re no saner than psychologists. Obviously.

          As for Jefferies’ riff on guns-and-suicide, what the f’k does he want? More guys flying out of 11th story windows on Madison Avenue when their lover dumps them? Landing on me while I window shop? Screw that.

          He nailed the “severely autistic gun shopper,” though. FFL’s, be enlightened. The DEA may be employing the developmentally-challenged to staff their sting operations, but if you sell to the next Lanza, Jon Stewart’s coming after you. Or Jefferies.

  4. I like Jim on other issues but he’s an Aussie. They’ve been brainwashed about guns so I can’t be too hard on him.

    On the surface Australia seems like a decent place to live but the censorship and anti-gun culture there is too much of a nanny state for my tastes. They do get a lot of things right in their society but when it comes to guns they got it dead wrong.

    • It is kind of surprising that such an individualistic people could willingly bring themselves to the point that a mob of Lebanese malcontents armed with clubs and lengths of pipe could bring major portions of the country to a complete standstill–but there it is.

      • Just like it’s surprising that a similarly individualistic people could willingly bring themselves to the point that two bumbling brothers armed with a pressure cooker and one handgun could bring a major city to a complete standstill, and allow – no, welcome – the police going door-to-door pointing rifles at everyone they see? Oh, and for extra style points, it happened to be the city that was the cradle of the revolution that brought the country into being.

        This isn’t intended as a defense of Australia’s pussification, just a reminder that while we may still have our guns, much of America has also lost its spine.

  5. jim jefferies has been slipping the last couple of years. it happens to comedians over time they get less funny especially as they get successful and dont want to piss off the Hollywood elite who can get them a show. back when jim jefferies used be more of a cringe comic he was way funnier. back when he used to do Opie and Anthony he was one of the funniest people in the world, now hes doing hack gun control bits

    • I don’t know if his TV series has been renewed. The first season was drop dead funny in spots. The second season went downhill rapidly.

      • Sad to say his show got cancelled and there will be no third season.

        He may be mostly wrong about guns but his standup is still funny. For those complaining, did you not get the echo chamber reference?

  6. It’s a comedy bit. It’s not supposed to be taken seriously. Honestly, any time somebody I’m arguing with uses something they heard from this guy, or John Stewart, or John Oliver, I consider it a win for me.

    • So people that are clearly anti gun in their personal lives, who have little to no gun experience parrot New York politicians in their “jokes”, I’m not to take it as propaganda? It’s one thing to have a George bush joke, it’s another thing to have a 25 minute bit about how guns are for killers and America is bad.
      In Jim Jefferies case he is an Australian so It’s even dumber for him to give America some lesson about guns. I think the same goes for all anti gun Hollywood types that use comedy as a smoke screen for some kind of political feelings they hold.

  7. In the ignorance, there is a point.
    Some of the anti gun idiots don’t look further than a name. They want to ban the FN Five Seven for being ‘armor piercing’ when almost any hunting rifle will pierce not only standard issue police soft armor but also solid steel armor.

    I just call em modern rifles or semi automatic rifles, but perhaps hollywood has screwed us over in ways beyond belief.

  8. We Americans can buy AR’s at Walmart & have them shipped to our homes!?! I want a tax rebate for my portion of the NICS system!

  9. I still like Jim, comedians need to be allowed to approach any topic they want, not every joke will land with every individual, that’s fine.

    Comics do not write public policy, they tell jokes, they can influence people, but Jim Jefferies isn’t going to change anyone’s beliefs.

    Enjoy the show, or don’t, but remember they are jokes.

  10. I live in a place that the UN ranks as one of the highest homicide rates per capita in the world. Guess what? We can’t get guns. All the criminals have guns though… I’ve never seen so many automatics in my life. They get those from S. America. AK’s, a few specials. Gun Control kills law abiding citizens by removing the choice to defend themselves. Trust me.. crims know yo armed, dey be back off real quick.

  11. “Is that why they’re called assault rifles?”

    They are mostly called assault weapons and they are called that to scare the low info voters. Assault weapons sounds so much more dangerous and scary than semi automatic rifle. As for the term assault rifle, blame the Nazis, they came up with the term.

  12. Some facts can’t be denied. Since the Port Arthur massacre in 1996 and the subsequent gun ban, there has not been a single mass shooting in Australia.

    Alan Brooks, maybe you should research more and help spread anti-gun lies less. Also, you can tell the fatalities from the Monash University shooting in 2002 to stop playing dead, and maybe tell the survivors that they were never shot. I bet they’ll be thrilled.

  13. If he smokes or drinks we should ask him why he does it. I’ll bet you he’ll respond with “because I like it
    same thing with sex: “because I like it”
    That’s pretty much the sole reason anyone does or owns anything. Because they like it. So even if that was the only reason for owning a gun (which we all know it isn’t) it’s still a legitimate answer. Dumb Aussie.

  14. Only with firearms do we see this purposefully ignorant behavior.

    If a bat is a murder weapon, then it is only called “murder weapon” after it has been used in a murder.

    If a car is a murder weapon, then it is only called “murder weapon” after it has been used in a murder.

    If a screwdriver is a murder weapon … you get where I’m going here.

    My rifle hasn’t been used in an assault, and neither has my rifle-caliber pistol. So how the heck are they assault weapons?

  15. Australia and England are full of people with about a >1000 year culture of monarchy and submission to authority. Those of them that rejected this culture set up shop in America a few hundred years ago. This is why they are incapable of understanding that true freedom requires the democratization of the threat of force.

  16. I don’t believe that ‘F–k off, I like guns!’ is the only argument for guns, but it’s good enough for me. In fact, I think that ‘F–k off, I like _________!’ is a pretty good argument for a lot of things.

    So from now on, if someone criticizes me for having guns, I’m gonna tell ’em ‘F–k off, I like guns!’ Thanks, Jim Jefferies. Now go tie your kangaroo down, sport. And f–k off.

  17. I watched the first few minutes and found it entertaining, just like I find Colbert and Stewart often entertaining when I occasionally see them. Why should get my panties in a bunch when I can laugh along instead or just turn it off? I don’t bitch when I see someone with a mouse gun either.

  18. This was funny. If you don’t have a sense of humor, your firearms are useless as you are dead already. Stop taking yourselves so seriously.

  19. I don’t think I’d be happy in Australia. No guns and talentless comedians who rant about topic they know nothing about. Oh yeah, and that whole toilet flushing backwards thing. What’s up with that $#!+?

    • that whole toilet flushing backwards thing. What’s up with that $#!+?

      OMG, do you mean that the $#!+ goes up instead of down? Damn, I am never flushing in Australia. Ever.

  20. This man comes from a country where fixing the tap to your kitchen sink requires government permission. I remain completely unsurprised hearing this kind of rhetoric from the lips of any Commonwealth subject.

  21. ….Are we supposed to get our panties in a twist because of the stand-up routine of a comedian from the other side of the planet now?

  22. “Maybe we should start referring to ARs as “Protection Rifles.”

    Hey, I’ve been calling AR’s “weapons of mass protection” for about ten years now. Granted, the term hasn’t caught on, but the sentiment and the reality are still there.

  23. I wad almost mad because I thought my comment had been deleted. Then I remembered that I had put my phone in airplane mode while reading, after the page was loaded, tried to post my comment with that on, and didn’t bother to watch and see if it went.

  24. If you look very hard at your monitor you can see me doing my impression of not giving one single fsck about Jim Whazzisname.

  25. I love Jim Jefferies! Comedians are telling jokes. Many times they are portraying a character. Regardless you shouldn’t get bent out of shape because someone doesn’t agree with your political motivations. Comedian’s are the last bastion of free speech, and they are under attack these days. They are the canary in the mine.

  26. For a man who states that he doesn’t like lies he tells plenty of them. Like he repeatedly states “the worst massacre in the world”. He seems to have forgotten anders breivik, woo bum kon, William unek, etc. Typical uninformed idiot, passing along the lines he “heard somewhere”. Ofc, I understand this is comedy, but I think this man forgot one of the basic rules for jokes, it must have a basis in truth. Otherwise it’s just a guy
    making sh#t up. And that’s not funny.

  27. Funny thing after noticing this story.

    Just spent an evening with a 2 Australian couples (old and new friends in their early 30’s). All of them own guns and ALL of them are better versed in the our 2nd Amendment (IMHO) than most of the U.S. population. I was very surprised… Sad and pathetic on our end.

    They state that Australia gets lots of flak [from Americans regarding gun control] but they are among the many who are tired of their own government and gun control.

  28. “Bringing a gun to a drone fight.”

    This is why the second amendment doesn’t say “right to bear rifles” or “right to carry pistols.” It says “right to keep and bear arms.”

    Arms includes anti-aircraft weapons, as well as tanks, artillery, and battleships.

  29. This is one of the reasons why I stopped watching Comedy Central. These past 10 odd years or so they have just become too preachy. The stand-ups today are not funny like the one’s 10 years ago.

    Back then they weren’t preachy, they were actually funny. Now they sound like a rallying cry for the DNC. Like Bill Burr that was shown above, I love that guy he was always funny and tells it like it is. Not PC and makes you think beyond the group-think of the lowest common denominator.

  30. I find it hilarious how many people here insult this guy, calling him a dumb Aussie and many other things. He is an entertainer. A few people even admitted they only watched a few minutes then turned it off. Then called him names. He is joking. If course if he was pro gun, he would have been brilliant. Get a sense of humor!

  31. Apparently you can’t read statistics because, murder actually went down , armed robberies where reduced. Ok sexual assaults went up, but I doubt that has anything to do with a gun, probably more like a knife. Women in Australia have never carried little purse guns, so protection argument is out. Jim Jefferies makes more sense than you wish to acknowledge.

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