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TTAG’s Managing Editor Dan Zimmerman has been felled by a kidney stone so big his doctor mistook it for a glacial erratic. Dan’s wife and agent provocateur [not shown] reports that our highest (not to mention only) paid employee is resting comfortably, drifting in and out of consciousness whilst riding the dragon. We await the Obamacare Death Panel’s final verdict. Meanwhile, please join me in wishing the most sarcastic writer in the universe a speedy recovery. [NB: if a Rhode Island girl can claim universal sex appeal, Dan can take inter-Galactic snark honors.] Even in his drug-addled haze Dan the man’s plan is to recover in time to make the SHOT show. Whadda guy. Take you time Dan. Rest well. Make it happen.

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  1. Get well Dan. Remember the hospital rule of thumb for middle-aged male patients: the hotter the nurse the more she desires you.

  2. Best wishes on your recovery. Doesn’t sound like fun. BTW, in the photo, there’s an Elvis impersonator on the right but on the left…. is that Nicolas Cage?

  3. A real man would just drink some bourbon before cutting the kidney stone out with a bowie knife himself and not succumb to the communist in chief’s anti American social health care.

  4. …funny that they refer to it as a “stone”….anything that takes that much pain-killer should be called….I don’t know….a “boulder” at least…eh?

    That doesn’t have much a medical ring to it, does it?

    Kidney Stone vs. Kidney Boulder….?

    The latter sounds like a place to get a $10.00 hot-dog or something..?

    ..well, feel better before Obamacare bans pain medication….


    RJ O’Guillory
    Webster Groves-The Life of an Insane Family

  5. Dan,

    Best wishes for a speedy recovery.

    Robert: extra credit for introducing a moderately obscure (as far as general use) geologic term to a health discussion on TTAG.

  6. Been there!! Hurts like hell!! Get better soon Dan, we miss ya and Robert needs his right hand(ed) man back!!!!

  7. @Robert,
    We wish Dan a fast an speedy recovery.

    If by chance Dan is unable to go to the shot show, I would like to graciously volunteer my time and energy and go in his place. You know purely out of the goodness of my heart, and to help out… 😉

    • About 10 years ago I was hospitalised. I don’t smoke or drink and the only drugs I take are what a Dr. prescribes and when the ailment is cleared up I stop taking them.

      I tell you this as an explanation. The doctor gave me morphine. If I was to take to illegal drugs, it would be morphine. I lost a week out of my life and I still have fond memories.

  8. Get well soon, Dan. We miss ya. BTW, you look great in that outfit with the feathered headdress. When did you start wearing it outside the house?

  9. Good luck Dan. I know how painful that can be. I hope they keep you properly medicated. Please remember you won’t be safe to handle firearms for at least a month after you get out.

  10. Nothing wrong with a kidney stone a few hours on a jackhammer can’t fix, and Dan looks to have the physique for it.

  11. Kidney stones typically leave the body by passage in the urine stream, and many stones are formed and passed without causing symptoms. If stones grow to sufficient size (usually at least 3 millimeters (0.12 in)) they can cause obstruction of the ureter. ‘-`^


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