Denver Cops Whip Out Their Pieces During Swing Party


Guns and booze don’t mix. We all know that, right? Throw some sex into that admixture and you’ve got yourself a really combustible situation. Sadly, that’s a lesson Denver officers Steve Loan and Jeremy Ownbey never learned in their time on the force and now there’s an active investigation into the two coppers. Copper? I hardly know her! Well, that seems to have been part of the problem . . .

As relates,

Two Denver police officers are being investigated after a fight that allegedly occurred at an officer’s home during a swingers party…An argument started and the two women allegedly started fighting. The officers also got into an altercation. Aurora police say Sloan pulled his gun during the incident.

And by “pulled his gun” we think they mean his GLOCK.

Compounding the fun and games, the Aurora PD’s response to the carnal commotion apparently wasn’t exemplary either. “Aurora police also said four officers who responded to the incident are now the subject of an internal affairs investigation for not conducting a DUI investigation on Ownbey.” Apparently Mrs. Ownbey’s thong wasn’t the only thin blue line that went up that night.


  1. avatar borg says:

    Maybe the cops in question need to talk with a spiritual advisor about their morals or lack of them.

    1. avatar DaveL says:

      The cops’ lack of morals, or the spiritual advisors’?

      1. avatar borg says:

        Maybe both.

        1. avatar Gregolas says:

          Just WHAT is wrong with people doing 1940’s dances to Big Band tunes?!?!

  2. avatar possumdog89 says:

    Its all good! Because police are the only ones responsible enough to own a gun. Us regular peasants would just get ourselves into a stupid situation and hurt ourselves or someone else….. Help! Im being repressed!

    1. avatar Rob1285 says:

      You can’t expect to wield supreme power just ’cause some watery tart threw a sword at you

      1. avatar John in Ohio says:

        Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help, help, I’m being repressed!

        1. avatar Geoff PR says:

          Bloody peasant!

          So, where is the castle Anthrax?

        2. avatar pyratemime says:

          It might be in the basement, some swing parties do the spankings down there… so I have heard.

  3. avatar NYC2AZ says:

    From hence forth, she’ll be known as “Finger Cuffs.”

    1. avatar Bluesman007 says:

      Is her name Alyssa Jones?

      1. avatar Pencotron says:

        “Hey boss, my Friday was just completed by an awesome comment made online – so I’m gonna go home now. Yeah, thanks you too!”

  4. avatar Tom W. says:

    This is my pistol, this is my gun, this one’s for,…..oh nevermind….

  5. avatar PhoenixNFA says:

    They sure took “(moderated) THE POLICE!!!!!” To a new level eh?

    1. avatar DaveL says:

      I’m sure that there have to be at least a few ladies who’ve earned the nickname “N.W.A.” for precisely that reason.

  6. avatar Vhyrus says:

    Theres more than a few cops in the swinging scene. Not as many as military though…

    uh…. so I`ve heard, I mean!

    1. avatar RockOnHellChild says:

      Funny, I’ve heard the same thing…

    2. avatar S. Cautela says:

      Yeah I’d like to see a cover story of Army Times be “Top Ten Duty Stations For Swinging”… It would be more interesting than just another article about what our next combat uniform will look like.

      1. avatar The Brotherhood of Steel says:

        Good one! Ft Drum is definitely in the top ten.

        1. avatar S. Cautela says:

          I’m shocked at your last comment!… I can’t believe that Tundra Pigs… Errr, I mean women from the Fort Drum area would engage in such behavior.

  7. avatar Dickie J says:

    Be careful with that thing! They have a propensity to just go off at the slightest touch.

  8. avatar Paul B says:

    You deal with Miscreants all day and it is hard not to do some of the stuff they do.

    1. avatar ken says:

      Esp when the officer in question, dealing with the daily depravity, thinks that it sure looks like fun….

    2. avatar Paladin says:

      Swinging isn’t illegal, consenting adults and all that.

  9. avatar ken says:

    If this occured in the home, what does a DUI have to do with it? That must be an awfully rare home that moves, unless they all live in an RV…

    1. avatar DavidT says:

      The DUI would be for the drunken cop pulling his pistol for no good reason. They need to be held to at least the same standards as they would hold us to.

      1. avatar Stinkeye says:

        How is that “driving under the influence”? Being an idiot, yes. Reckless endangerment or assault or some similar charge, sure. Driving, not so much.

        1. avatar Jus Bill says:

          Maybe he tried to drive away. Sure hope he remembered to get dressed first.

    2. avatar Tyler M says:

      It seems like the DUI was prior to this incident. I think the point they poorly made, was that he should have already been investigated for a DUI charge, before this occurred.

  10. avatar chris says:

    A swing and a miss

    1. avatar Matt in FL says:

      Well played, sir.

  11. avatar chris says:

    Or is that friendly fire

  12. What started the cat fight? Can’t believe there wasn’t enough co…cop to go around.
    Women…can’t swing with’em…can’t swing without’em.

    1. avatar Stinkeye says:

      You most certainly can swing without ’em. But then it’s a whole different kind of party.

    2. avatar Rich Grise says:

      The only part of a girl fight I like is right after the end, when they kiss and make up.

    3. avatar Herb says:

      Confucius say:

      “Man who pinch pennies at home have wife who squeezes coppers in kitchen.”


  13. avatar Gun Safe says:

    “At the end of the day, I just want to get home to my wife. And also my partner’s wife.”

    1. avatar DaveL says:

      I used to know a guy who loved to watch the shocked looks on the faces of his straight-laced co-workers when he announced “I think I’ll go and f*ck my first wife.”

      Of course, he had only ever married once, and never divorced.

      1. avatar Avid Reader says:

        Worked with a guy who would say something similar. The usual response to him was along the lines of:
        “So that takes care of the first five minutes of your evening. What are you going to do with the rest of it?”

        1. avatar Roscoe says:

          Wash, rinse, repeat!

    2. avatar Matt in FL says:

      Laughing out loud at work makes people know you’re not working. So, thanks for that.

  14. avatar RockOnHellChild says:

    Those cops are a different breed…

    Or they breed differently, in this situation.

    1. avatar pyratemime says:

      Funny most of the swingers I have known had strict rules against breeding during play time, hygiene concerns and the like.

  15. avatar The Brotherhood of Steel says:

    Swinging is dangerous, I’ve known a couple people into it, and was even invited to partake in it once. Declined. This dude literally showed me naked pictures of his wife and asked if I’d go home with him to do her while he watched. Something just inherently wrong with that. It always ends ugly for people, and sometimes people end up getting killed. Sure, it may seem just peachy to let your bro plow your wife and you plow his but then someone gets emotionally attached and things turn ugly real quick.

    1. avatar But... says:

      Swingers are usually less inclined to jealousy which is partly why they are involved in swinging.

    2. avatar Tyler M says:

      You realize the logic there is almost exactly the same of gun control advocates. Please tell me this was dripping with sarcasm. You offer no statistics, vague anecdotal evidence and a statement of personal morality superimposed on others.

      1. avatar The Brotherhood of Steel says:

        Wow guy, offended much? Why don’t you get back to watching your wife get plowed…

        1. avatar Tyler M says:

          A tad offended, actually, yes. Not a swinger, in a poly-ship.

          Moreover, though, the logic you use was so close to the typical irrational, gun control advocate, I was hoping that you could see through that.

          “Guns are dangerous! I know a couple people who are into it, even had one ask me to partake. DECLINED! My friend wanted me to go to the gun range and shoot his scary black gun. What’s wrong with that person. Doesn’t he know that it may seem like a “fun” afternoon can turn tragic and ugly in a moment! Someone gets angry about something, or slips and then next thing you know, people die!!”
          ^^ not a valid statement.

          “I know a few people in swinging; it’s not for me.”
          “I know a few people into guns; it’s not for me.”
          ^^ valid statements.

        2. avatar The Brotherhood of Steel says:

          Ok buttlove. You have fun with that, Don’t let me know how it turns out…

        3. avatar Albaniaaaaa says:

          Actually, the anti-sexual and close minded views on sex that people like you hold cause a lot of relationship and social problems. Much more so than the open views swingers or poly people have. However you can keep thinking how you think with your self-righteous attitude. This is America after all. Though ironically the sexually repressed and close minded often try to legislate their morals into law.

        4. avatar Tyler M says:

          @Albaniaaaaa – Thank you. I think we can be friends. 🙂

        5. avatar The Brotherhood of Steel says:

          Albania, he wants to be much more than just friends with you….

        6. avatar John in Ohio says:

          @The Brotherhood of Steel: I’m glad I wasn’t the only one thinking that. ROTFL

        7. avatar S. Cautela says:

          I don’t visit this website to be lectured by polyamorous people who say that close minded (traditional) views of relationships are akin to those of gun confiscating statists… The Brotherhood of Steel’s original comment was far from inflamatory or offensive… And I think that his central point that swinging is a high-risk behavior due to human nature is a simple fact, not a condemnation of someones lifestyle.

        8. avatar Tyler M says:

          @S. Cautela — Far from offensive? His language in his first to his last post was extremely demeaning and dismissive towards people of alternative lifestyles. There was an implication that we’re just a violent homicide waiting to happen (as opposed to all the domestic violence in straight, monogamous relationships or what?).

          I don’t come to this site to be lectured by ignorant people on how my lifestyle is morally repugnant and violence waiting to happen. When someone is attacking my personal relationships by proxy (swinging is a related subset of polyamory, but different), I feel I am in the right to defend it.

          When his logic is virtually the same as the dribble that comes from the gun grabbers, I’m going to say so.

          Now, may we continue to discuss firearms?

      2. avatar RockOnHellChild says:

        Is there a swinger registry or data base where one could get statistical information?

        I would think everyone’s opinion on swinging would be based solely on anecdotal information.

        1. avatar Tyler M says:

          …actually there are a lot of studies on alternative relationship models out there. Polyamoury, swinging, hook-up culture, kink, asexual/aromantic arrangements, etc. This stuff is a goldmine for sociology types. =P

    3. avatar RockOnHellChild says:

      Dated a woman once, on date three she informed me she was happily married.

      As shocking as this was, she informed me it was OK for her to date, so she could bring home men, apparently hubby liked to watch.

      That was our last date.

      1. avatar The Brotherhood of Steel says:

        Yeah, good thing you got out, it could’ve been one of those things were they try and lure you into sex with the husband like what happened to that guy on Rescue Me hahaha.

        1. avatar RockOnHellChild says:

          I never watched the show.

          But, that’s kind of what I was thinking. I figured I was going be drugged and wake up, naked, tied face down on a bed, covered in canola oil with some big, hairy guy in a batman costume attempting to mount me.

        2. avatar Matt in FL says:

          <whispers> “I’m Batman.”

        3. avatar Jus Bill says:

          Could also have been luring you into attempted blackmail. Or bashing you in the head and taking off with your wallet and car.

        4. avatar Dirk Diggler says:

          Batman? or Bloomberg wearing a french maid outfit like they did in the Little Nicky movie with Hitler taking a flask up the a$$

        5. avatar John in Ohio says:

          @RockOnHellChild: 😀 😀 😀

  16. avatar Mike says:

    I thought all sex stopped when you got married?

    1. avatar The Brotherhood of Steel says:

      Only for the husband. Typically the wife keeps gettin some on the side.

      1. avatar Sammy says:

        Your right. I remember when my ex cut me down to twice a week. I didn’t feel THAT bad cause I knew there were two other guys she cut off completely.

  17. avatar Sammy says:

    The important thing is they went home to their families.

    1. avatar Jus Bill says:

      Wait for it… At the end of their “shift.”

  18. avatar Mediocrates says:

    “Guns a booze don’t mix.”

    and on the internet, neither does spelling, punctuation, and grammer! 😀 Ban me please!! 🙂

    1. avatar Stinkeye says:



      1. avatar Soccerchainsaw says:

        It is so easy to hit the “Post Comment” button without proofreading sometimes…

  19. avatar Jus Bill says:

    Uh, professional courtesy? With the emphasis on “pro.”

  20. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    Assault with a friendly weapon

  21. avatar John in Ohio says:

    Guns and booze don’t mix. We all know that, right?

    /OT grumbling on

    That’s debatable. For years many of us have partaken of beverage (and for some, other substances). It all depends upon what one is doing with the firearm at the time. If it is in a holster for defensive purposes then it’s a non-issue. I know the line worked well for the article so I’m not complaining about that aspect. It’s just that I see this line thrown about more often and it just doesn’t fit reality. If it’s repeated often enough, it will be taken by many as gospel. Off duty cops and other citizens drink while armed everyday. A few irresponsible people shouldn’t drink while armed or in possession of any other tools or equipment; but that’s it.

    /OT grumbling off

  22. avatar borg says:

    Maybe it was not a DUI but CUI or carrying under the influence which they likely use the same legal limit for carrying under the influence as they do for driving.

  23. avatar Dirk Diggler says:

    I see no one pointed out that Aurora is also home to the state senator that helped sponsor the gun mag limit bill and where the movie theater shooter (dressed like batman) went wild. . . . . can’t wait to see what she offers for constitutent services. . . .

  24. avatar Tyler M says:

    From the article the DUI charge seems to be a prior offense and unrelated to this charge. I see a trend with this guy. Alcohol and…anything doesn’t mix with him.

  25. avatar Soccerchainsaw says:

    Did this fight break out when they were playing Benny Goodman records or Glen Miller records?

    1. avatar John in Ohio says:

      Glenn Miller, In the Mood.

  26. avatar MichaelB says:

    Who’s taking odds on which occifer does his desk pop first?

    1. avatar John in Ohio says:

      While surfing pr0n or without?

  27. avatar dh34 says:

    Ma’am we’re going to need to search you for hidden mini revolvers.

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