By lance alot
At one point, my future former wife and I were a couple of years into our marriage, and we had a bit of a ritual for home defense. Future former wife had a handgun from early in her life and she kept it in her nightstand. I didn’t have a firearm of my own, and was quite comfortable letting her be the home defender. After all, she slept closer to the gun than I. We also had a home security system that we religiously activated at night.
Our home sported a rock exterior, which I thought was endlessly fascinating to look at. We had a recessed front porch adjacent to a fine wooden structure for vines and trees to grow on, into and on top of. The one disappointment was that the front door was a solo affair, with no screen or glass door fronting the main door. We found this actually convenient, and never considered installing an additional entrance door. That ultimately led to “the event.”
About two years into our residence in the described house, we retired as usual, checking that the cat was indoors, the front and back doors were locked (I’m still sure it was locked), and the alarm system armed. Sometime in the night, the alarm sounded, immediately waking us.
Wife rolled to the nightstand, retrieved her gun, and ran from the bedroom to the front of the house. Serving as backup and reserve (having no gun of my own), I was detailed to dial 911. Our neighborhood paid for constant police patrol at night, so the response time was always about two minutes to any of the houses.
After informing 911 of the potential break-in, I scurried to the front of the house to encourage my wife in her defense of the castle. When I arrived at the foyer, I immediately noticed the cat sitting quitely, staring at my wife. My wife was clutching her firearm in an isosceles stance, sweeping the gun and her eyes through the open front door, covering almost a one hundred eighty degree field of fire. Completely naked.
After our hearts slowed a bit, and the wife was convinced there was no threat in the front of the house, she proceeded to exit with the intent to search for whomever had tried to break in. She took two steps onto the concrete of the porch, realized her lack of protective gear, screamed and dashed back into the house.
After she spent about a minute re-calibrating me about letting my wife attempt home defense without proper clothing, the cops knocked on the door. I smiled as she ran back to the bedroom to dress while I, covered by a robe, met the police and explained the situation.
There was no external evidence of anyone near the residence who shouldn’t have been there, so the cops walked the perimeter and left. We later decided that the door was not fully closed, wind had opened it. That was my fault because I was door monitor that night, and swore the door was closed and locked. My wife threatened to end me if I told anyone about her action that night, but my future former wife has been my former wife now for quite some time, so here it is, the story of “the event.”
Lesson learned? Put a gun of my own in my night stand, and sleep in some sort of covering suitable for fending off intruders.