StealthGear USA makes an impressive inside-the-waistband holster. Their ONYX hybrid design is beautifully made and extremely comfortable. Check out our review here. Of course, all that quality doesn’t come cheap. But that’s not a problem since you can snag one here for free. All you need to do is unleash your inner P.J. O’Rourke and make me laugh with your erudition and wit. The commenter doing it best will win their pick of the StealthGear litter. You have until midnight Sunday. Ladies and gentlemen, start your keyboards.

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152 Responses to Weekend Photo Caption Contest – Win A StealthGear Holster!

  1. “I’ve got the air conditioning vent!”

    Not sure if they still have high cover guys on patrols, but I bet the Viet Nam vets get it.

  2. While I’m an advocate of ending gun free school zones, actually issuing a rifle to each student may be taking a good concept a bit too far.

  3. “Meanwhile, the Deer-Trail, Colorado drone-hunting permit course is just about to graduate its first set of students…”

  4. “I think a skylight here would go nice.”

    “The rear gets great light, so it should have another window.”

    “Don’t most city apartments have a peep-hole in the front door? I thought it was a regulation. It oughta be a regulation; I’m calling my rep as soon as I take care of this.”

  5. Ben Roberts and Ivan Goff prior to creating their famed 70’s TV show “Charlies Angles were going through a box of old photos from a garage sale and they related that “we could not get this one out of our heads”

    Mr legget, I didn’t see yours before I wrote this, you get half credit

  6. “The ladies put down their pens, confident that they easily passed the written portion of the test. But on the practical portion, not so much…”

  7. I’ll cover the ceiling while the two of you execute the students in front and behind you.

    Anyone else notice the asian in the back is pointing it right at someone’s face?

  8. I recognized that place and the rifles right away as the Westside Pistol Range, featured at least a few times on TTAG, most recently as the site of Dan Boyle’s controversial Appleseed class.

  9. The teacher thought that the Home economics class wasn’t covering enough, so she brought home defense in as well.

  10. The New York Times vision of guns in schools.

    Group therapy for the recently divorced?

    Not fans of catch and release dating?

  11. If I actually have to be funny, I have no chance of winning. If you just end up picking a comment at random out of sheer laziness, then I have a fighting chance.

  12. Meanwhile, at a production meeting for the show “Cheaters”…

    “Guys, we need to boost ratings.”

    “I’ve got just the idea!”

  13. Having mastered the four rules, Eddie Eaglettes Moira (“Lefty”) Leftkowich, overachiever Amanda (“Shoot for the Stars”) Chin, and Anne (“Annie Oakley”) Deng learn the fundamentals of sight alignment.

  14. New to TTAG gun reviews…

    The “Overall Rating” score will be replaced with, “if I bring this gun home to the wife/girlfriend, what will she think of it?”

  15. Fingers off the triggers? Check!
    Know what’s behind your target? Check!
    Not pointing the weapon at anything you’re not willing to destroy? Check!
    Cute girls with guns? Check! Check! Check!

  16. “Principle Edward’s first attempt to treat guns like cars was going swimmingly until the hands-on portion of the ‘gunner-education’ class…”

  17. Don’t follow the photo’s link to the story- unless Bloomberg newspeak is your thing. I am soooo tired of being blamed for the acts of criminals.

  18. Mary you get the archangel stock, Yuan modify yours as a bullpup, me I’m going for a Volquartsen trigger and composite barrel.

  19. “Ladies, somewhere in this room I’ve hidden a duck wearing the latest pair of designer shoes”

  20. With their husbands out of town on business, Lucy, Jennie and Francine had to find some other way to deal with those icky spiders.

  21. Saint Mary’s College Advanced Women studies curriculum. Initially Susan thought sight alined center mass was a reference for communion, the class took a turn when the instructor conducted a thought experiment and asked…would the world be different if Jesus had one of these?

  22. The girl on the left may be a lefty, but she has good trigger discipline and stance.
    Ms. Middle can be seen pointing her rifle to the ceiling, and Ms. Right can be seen leaning away from her rifle and not achieving any sort of cheek weld whatsoever.

    Given the data here, you’d be a fool to not pick the girl on the left. Unless Asians are your thing.

  23. Only 3 students signed up for the lesbian empowerment firearms course.
    Surprisingly enough, 50 male students(not shown) audited the course.

  24. “I call this one my divorce attorney. I said ’til death do us part. He might be a lying, cheating jerk, but I always keep my word.”

  25. …..and when the BAT flew into the room, Bill’s gun safety class experienced ‘technical difficulties’.

  26. When defending yourself against a GIANT be sure to aim for the noggin’ or the nuts! Now let’s practice class.

  27. “I have a very strict gun control policy: if there’s a gun around, I want to be in control of it.”

  28. The students finally woke up and decided to keep the liberals out of the classroom, and learn about REAL American history.

  29. Remember class in the case of a real emergency, we will be protected by the sign on the front of the building that states: Gun Free Zone

  30. “You two hold security while I try to shoot that duck!”

    “Unfortunately for him, emotionally troubled teen Matthew Schmuckatelli had chosen that day to attack a school…”

  31. “You may be a gun nerd if:

    -The first thing you noticed about this picture was the good trigger discipline all around.

    -The second thing you noticed was the woman on the right may be muzzle-sweeping another person. Bad form!

    -You notice absolutely nothing else.”

  32. 1. Incoming Republican White House Intern class.

    2. Classes? We don’ need no steenken’ classes!

    3. Transfers from the Joe Biden ‘Buy a Shotgun’ School of Idiotic Thought.

    4. Aspiring Betty Crocketts.

    5. Classed and maybe Injurious.

    • That was my first caption idea as well. Then I figured I’d run with:

      ABC’s “Charlie’s Angels”/”Head of the Class” mashup tested poorly with trial audiences.

      (apparently a number of other commenters also noted the similarity to the original Charlie’s Angels title card, so I suppose I’m not as original as first hoped. Fortunately the same network did in fact run both shows, so the premise at least has merit)

  33. Ms. Smith’s American History class got into trouble doing their re-enactment of Custers Last Stand. Apparently it violated the no guns in school policy set by the school board.

    The historical accuracy violations weren’t even discussed at the preliminary hearing.

  34. 1. Don’t you dare copy my test!
    2. A new class for daughters: how to say no to boys
    3. Reach out and touch a pervert

  35. 1. Teaching the most important life skills
    2. A school worth learning from
    3. How to make students pay attention
    4. Class is never boring
    5. This is a school that is doing things right, teaching how to aim high
    6. The right way to teach women how to say no
    7. The way fathers would like high schools to teach their daughters
    8. No way is any boy taking advantage of me

  36. 1. A school teaching the most important life skills to young women
    2. A fathers dream school
    3. Learning in school was never this fun

  37. 1. Charlie’s Angel training class
    2. Knowledge is powerful
    3. Preparing youth today for the problems of the world

  38. Ladies, a rifle is one the most useful tools, that a single girl, should have in her home. In a pinch, they can be used to open juice cans, beer bottles, and dispatch fruit flies. Tie an old towel on the buttstock and you’ve got a mop.Most importantly, you can use it to inspire your lazy-assed boyfriend to get off the couch and get something done. Like take out the trash or buy you that engagement ring you’ve been waiting an eternity for. Keep an extra rifle on hand for when your mother visits. He’s sure to get the message.

  39. We don’t normally consider ourselves sticklers here, but Kevin W. missed taking home the prize by this much. Fifty-eight seconds, to be exact. That’s why we call it the WEEKEND caption contest.

    Fortunately, we had an array of other good ‘uns, too. Among them were Jared from Tampa, Mitchell!, Out Fang Thief, Ian S. and John. But this week’s winner with a subtle shot at our maximum leader was RLC2. Congrats.

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