Haiku Safety Pro Tip: Don’t Play With Your Gun

No matter how bored,
the four rules always apply
or tears may ensue.


  1. avatar Mr. Lighter says:

    Unload your firearm
    It shouldn’t be difficult
    Don’t be a dumbass

    1. avatar Roll says:

      Unload your firearm
      But please, not into yourself
      It will leave a mark

      this is fun

  2. avatar PhoenixNFA says:

    Haikus are very fun
    But sometimes they don’t make sense

    1. avatar rt-texas says:

      Thank you

  3. avatar Ralph says:

    Stroking your Nambus
    Writing like you’re Japanese
    You guys must be nuts

    1. avatar Russ Bixby says:

      Engineer by choice;
      in school, assface gets the girl.
      Indeed, I am a nut.

      1. Don’t have a nambu.
        My arisaka’s nice, though.
        You care to see it?

        1. avatar jwm says:

          You guys really should go someplace private to play with your Nambus.

        2. avatar Ralph says:

          Your Arisaka
          Had its mum ground off by hand
          I guess it was yours

        3. avatar jwm says:


        4. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

          OH! That took me more than a minute to figure out. Mum….geez, this is a hilarious thread!

        5. Sitting in Starbucks
          Laughing at Ralph’s last haiku.
          Others look askance.

        6. avatar Russ Bixby says:

          No Niponese guns;
          Commie iron must suffice.
          Mosin keeps me warm.

    2. avatar pwrserge says:

      I find it hilarious that most people miss the fact that Haiku only works well in Japanese because of Japanese language structure…

      1. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

        But they’re funnier in english!

  4. avatar Russ Bixby says:

    Firearms lend their strength;
    blameless, they would lend strength to —
    base stupidity.

  5. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    Playing with your Glock
    Thinking it was your johnson
    Sutures in your leg

    1. avatar JaredFromTampa says:

      Dude, you won the internet for today.

    2. avatar John Fritz says:

      Heh. I’ve seen that up close and personal when I worked in an inner-city ER.

  6. avatar pyratemime says:

    Mind is not focused
    Fingers become lazy careless
    Injury will result

  7. avatar Ropingdown says:

    Glock stuck in waistband
    Street lights out the hood heats up
    One rule survival

    I get it. This is a poetry retreat? Stand Your Ezra Pound?

  8. avatar jwm says:

    There once was a man from Nantuckett…….

    1. avatar Ralph says:

      Who kept all his cash in a bucket

      I bet you don’t know that one.

    2. avatar Ropingdown says:

      His pistol he forgot where he stuck it.
      When he scratched where it itched
      Gun went off, what a bvtch!
      No more will he casually tuck it.

      1. avatar Brandon says:


      2. avatar Russ Bixby says:

        We are become stone soup.

  9. avatar imrambi says:

    Who is Goddard?
    Why was he near?
    When four rules were forgotten?

  10. avatar Micha Lipson says:

    I DOESNT matter to me how many times it stated to intelligent people or not. Don’t ever believe your gun is safe merely because you dropped the magazine from the firearm. In most cases there is still. 1 Round left in the chamber that wil kill anyone just as well as the rounds in the lhe magazine. A Policeman of many years came into the range I used and was showing his fireaarm to the salesman and dropped the mag. And thankfully aimed his weapon in a safe direction and pulled they rigger to the astonishment of all 1 round exited the weapon and no one was hurt. I heard he was severely disciplined. This wa

    1. avatar Cameron S. says:

      My local police chief made news by having an ND at his home simply because he forgot to pop his chamber during takedown of his new duty weapon.

      For some reason sheeple assume LEO’s are above human error with firearms.

    2. avatar pwrserge says:

      And that’s why I cary in condition 3. The chances of stupidity due to failing to check the chamber, far more dangerous than extra second to rack the slide.

      1. avatar CarlosT says:

        Tell that to George Zimmerman. If he’d been carrying Condition 3,he’d probably be brain damaged or dead now.

  11. avatar Cameron S. says:

    Keep finger indexed
    Until you are on target
    Or you may be next

  12. avatar ready,fire,aim says:

    which gun we talking about here?……oh that gun

  13. avatar David says:

    A note to the fellas running this site, ive gotten 4 viruses off this site causing me to have to reformat my phone and laptop. I only visit secure sites my business uses and has used for over 8 years without a problem. I know whos to blame, ive received anti gun pro Obama pop ups, with maig adds..just wanted to let someone on the board know whats bin happening to me. Please look into this for all of us PRO 2nd A people.

    1. We’re in the process of running these down. Thanks for your patience.

      1. avatar Haiku Guy says:

        I was getting all sorts of warnings about cross scripting, and the site would not stop loading. As my friend, the Asiana Airlines captain would say, “Sum Ting Wong”…

        1. avatar jwm says:

          The guy driving the fire truck must have been his cousin.

  14. avatar Jack says:

    Yes, the safety rules always apply. But every time I hear about laws that prohibit carry in certain places (government buildings, workplaces, etc.), I think about the danger of forcing people to remove their guns in their cars–in terms of the risk of accidental discharges, theft, and “person with a gun in a car” 911 calls.

  15. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    Once a man played with his gun
    Thought he was having some fun
    He sat in it’s path
    Then felt it’s whole wrath
    Now his leg is undone

    1. avatar CA.Ben says:

      hahahahaha, Tom your comments have me rolling so hard

  16. avatar Sock Monkey says:

    Kansas has gun permits?

    1. avatar miserylovescompany says:

      Only for CCW, otherwise no.

    2. avatar Russ Bixby says:

      And they are will-issue.

  17. avatar Gyufygy says:

    Screw the video, I love the firearms haikus.

  18. avatar Haiku Guy says:

    God gave us Four Rules.
    Because when it’s Life or Death,
    Ten was too many.

  19. avatar Haiku Guy says:

    An awful story
    A man is shot near Goddard
    That’s in his Crotch, right?

  20. avatar Aharon says:

    I hope he makes a full recovery.

  21. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

    Stroking his wesson
    He thought it was His and Hers
    Pop goes the weasel

  22. avatar Al says:

    If Harry Potter
    Had a *Nambus* 2000
    The story ends fast

  23. avatar John Fritz says:

    ponder your handgun
    is it occupied with shells?
    don’t stroke the bang switch

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