Mmmmm…Guns and Barbecue

Roswell, New Mexico’s famous for all kinds of next level phenomena. But the latest and greatest is one we wouldn’t mind seeing spread throughout the land. We get the spooky details from “‘I have personally never heard of this in 13 years,’ said Sgt. Jim Preston of the Roswell Police Department.” Another alien sighting? Nope, just an Albertson’s grocery store employee who found that a case of frozen ribs he was unpacking came complete with a RIA 1911 and ammo. “There are a couple clues to the mystery. According to the police report, the meat package came from the Swift Packing Plant in Greeley, Colo., and the date on the package is June 8, 2011.” So that leaves only two questions: 1) which meatpacker slipped his heater in the box of babybacks and 2) why would you want to buy 18-month-old meat at Albertson’s?


  1. avatar Ralph says:

    why would you want to buy 18-month-old meat at Albertsons?

    Hello? Because it comes with a .38 Super, that’s why. Who wouldn’t buy a nice pistol for only $6.98 a pound?

    1. avatar Fyrewerx says:

      Now that Albertson’s has left Florida entirely, it can be disclosed that that’s the only kind of meat they sell (18-month old).

      1. avatar Ralph says:

        18 months old is practically fresh for Red Lion. Or so I’ve heard.

  2. avatar 07duallydog says:

    “why would you want to buy 18 month old meat at Albertson’s? …… Well if it comes with a RIA 1911 , I would buy it , though the meat might be a little old .Lol

  3. avatar sanchanim says:

    Yeah ok I would take it.. Can I get that wrapped to go though?

  4. avatar In Memphis says:

    Makes me think of the episodes of M*A*S*H where Radar is slowly packing up and mailing a Jeep home.

    But this is much better.

  5. avatar DaveM says:

    Now I know where to buy mystery meat and a 1911 beats the plastic toy in Cracker Jacks

  6. avatar Aharon says:

    Haven’t you guys heard about aged steaks?

    Perfectly Aged Steaks

  7. avatar Ryan Coryell says:

    Oh Greeley, All sorts a crazy crap goes on there!

Write a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

button to share on facebook
button to tweet
button to share via email