The Death of Satire – Quote of the Day

Britain’s Knife Control Is A Bad, Real-Life Parody Of Gun Control

courtesy artnet.com

“As a friend put it to me, ‘You can’t parody this anymore. If I said next on the list will be a ban on rope to prevent suicides and strangulation, they would take it up.’ But only after we finally defeat the National Cutlery Association and purge our politics of the corrupting influence of the rope manufacturers’ lobby.” – Robert Tracinski in Britain’s Knife Control Is A Bad, Real-Life Parody Of Gun Control [via thefederalist.com]

comments

  1. avatar CT Rally says:

    Where is the post about todays 2nd Amendment Rallys?

    http://ccdl.us/aboutmenu/events-2/438-march-14-rally

    1. See last night’s digest.

  2. avatar Craig in IA says:

    Get rid of lemmings! That’s what most of these bed-wetters remind me of- they just don’t realize there’s a cliff coming up pretty soon.

    Not intended to be sarcstic, but wth?

    1. avatar anonymoose says:

      Lemmings don’t actually do that. Disney just threw them off the cliff to their deaths to make them look stupid. They’re probably smarter than most “humans,” who WILL follow their leaders off a cliff for no reason.

      1. avatar Vanareb says:

        Think about it, would that be such a BAD idea?

        1. avatar Hooty says:

          Don’t forget that they intend to drag you with them.

  3. avatar Shire-man says:

    On this mornings local news they reported that a family of bears who through the stupidity of people had become dangerously comfortable around humans had been relocated and naturally they came back. So the stupid people want to relocate again. Rather than just leave the bears alone they interfered and fed them like pets. The only real solution for the bear-phobic will be to euthanize them because they will forever continue to trek back home.

    For all issues: wildlife, criminals, financial, rights, despots and dictators really the only options are learning to live with the thing or killing the thing. Half measures only accomplish delaying those two options. Learn to live with the wildlife or kill it. Learn to live with criminals or kill them. Learn to live with your debt or kill it. Learn to live with your rights or kill them. Learn to live with dictators or kill them.

    Half measures get you this knife banning bullshit. Everybody suffers under the weight of the stupidity while the problem as it is continues unabated and as time passes the need to decide to live with it or kill it grows.

    Of course the final solution is always in play but after a 60 hour work week I haven’t much time to get it done.

  4. avatar Vic Nighthorse says:

    How do you know those aren’t the king’s knives? 🙂

    1. avatar Vic Nighthorse says:

      Okay…. They’re all covered in shit.

  5. avatar Gov. William J Le Petomane says:

    What would Mel Brooks do?

    1. avatar Indiana Tom says:

      Mel said he could not do the parodies that he used to do in today’s society.

      1. avatar Geoff PR says:

        “Mel said he could not do the parodies that he used to do in today’s society.”

        It’s only getting worse. Colleges will no longer hire upstart comedians to perform for the students. Comedy is chock-full of non-PC and ‘micro-aggressions’.

        If we don’t get a handle on that crap it *will* bite us in the ass…

      2. avatar Gov. William J Le Petomane says:

        Yep. As Geoff said, the left has completely lost any semblance of a sense of humor. Which, incidentally opens a major opportunity for the right.

  6. avatar Gun Owning American says:

    So much for “no one is taking away your guns.”

  7. avatar dph says:

    Why is that idiot dressed like he is handling chemical weapons? Are knives in the UK poisonous too?

    1. avatar Rusty Chains says:

      I wondered that as well, but then I realized that his employers required that because they were afraid he would be infected by evil knife fumes. They did not want their employee to go out and randomly stab someone.

      Yes, sarcasm, but I might be right!

    2. avatar Brian says:

      They’ve got cooties.

    3. avatar Geoff PR says:

      “Why is that idiot dressed like he is handling chemical weapons?”

      That’s a British-EU thing known as “Health and Safety Regulations”.

      You know how California is bat-shit crazy with warning labels and banning things like Lawn Darts?

      Britain and the EU have taken that to spectacular lengths, enforced by law :

      Just one example – No band-aids in workplace first aid kits – someone might be allergic to them.

      This is the world Progressives want to live in…

  8. avatar former water walker says:

    Ummm…they might slice their hands open?!? Was “V for Vendetta” a prediction of NOW? Old Guy Fawkes was right peasant…

  9. avatar Shawn says:

    I’m waiting for the screwdriver ban. Also a ban on hacksaw and lawnmower blades. Or how about anything made of metal that is more than 4 inches long.

    1. avatar Cooter E Lee says:

      I may be a FUDD, but is there any need to get worried about that? We can still throw rocks at the armored police vehicles when the liberal politicians give the order to take my screwdrivers. /s/

    2. avatar Ralph says:

      “Or how about anything made of metal that is more than 4 inches long.”

      I fully expect the British to ban anything that is more than 4 inches long.

      1. avatar Indiana Tom says:

        People may have undergo surgery to fulfill this law.

        1. avatar Gun Free School Zones are a crime against humanity says:

          White english men won’t have to. They got inches to spare.

        2. avatar Lotek says:

          Ban high capacity testicles. No one needs that much semen to hunt.

        3. avatar 2004done says:

          Lotek (ban high cap testicles): done, in UK and USA. [Feminists obviously have more testosterone and power than their p-w’d “misogynists” have]

    3. avatar Geoff PR says:

      “I’m waiting for the screwdriver ban.”

      Look at the picture of that knife collection bin – The one with a pic of Cookie Monster on it –

      Yep, that’s a screwdriver!

    4. avatar tickTalk says:

      dang.. there goes the wife’s favorite dildo…

    5. avatar Martin B says:

      It’s over 3 inches in Britain. And no locking knives. If out on the street at night with a knife, you will probably be arrested. So good luck if you use knives at work and have the late shift.

  10. avatar Richard Revoir says:

    I have 40 or so knives in my collection. From a Nepalese chukkeri. To a Mike Draper custom. A ww2 paratroopers bayonet etc. To see these idiots melting down blades with substantial value is disgusting. These people are our allies , what a joke. The truly sick part is that’s what it will look like if our Government ever gets our guns. I saw the old man with the sign saying ” I will pry it from your cold dead hands ” brainwash the young , the elderly , and every one they possibly can that we and our guns , are bad. Take our constitution and tear it to pieces . put it back together in any way they see fit. I’d rather live in a cave with my guns. Than in a society of zombies marching around with no right’s. Living my life as some leftist twat orders me to. No thank you !!

    1. avatar California Richard says:

      The irony is that there isnt much you can do with all that melted down steel, exept make more steel things that can be easily sharpened in to a blade….. theres some hippy company out here that makes shovels out of melted down guns. I kinda want to buy one because thats good quality steel…. again, more irony, walking around with that shovel is probably illegal in England!

      1. avatar Grant says:

        You should buy one of those shovels & make an AK47. For instructions, search for ‘AK-47 made out of a shovel’. Then you can send them a thank you card for providing you such high quality steel.

  11. avatar GS650G says:

    Look at the Vincent clan . Thieves worshiped as hero’s in the UK

  12. avatar Jason A Somers says:

    I guess this would make the swiss army knife on my key chain as deadly as an A-10 and my Leatherman a B-52. What they should do is out law narcotics so we could cut back on overdoses.

  13. avatar Indiana Tom says:

    But only after we finally defeat the National Cutlery Association and purge our politics of the corrupting influence of the manufacturers’ lobby.” – Robert Tracinski in Britain’s Knife Control Is A Bad, Real-Life Parody Of Gun Control
    All true, but do you really think the Progtards are going to stop with guns?

  14. avatar Chip in Florida says:

    This is the most obvious proof of the idea that there are too many cavemen and not enough saber-tooth-tigers

  15. avatar Johnny108 says:

    Thank god!
    In another few years, I’m gonna show up on Britain’s shores with a few Lee-Enfields,
    and a few boxes of ammo.
    And I will own those islands! I plan on ruling it like a Somalian warlord; serve me and be armed. Don’t, and starve to death.
    It’s gonna be a cake walk.
    Once I take control, you all are invited, too! (I’m not gonna mess with the Scotch distilleries. You’ll love it!)

  16. avatar Chris Morton says:

    The UK is now the world’s largest group home for the developmentally disabled, surrounded by the world’s deepest moat.

  17. avatar ironicatbest says:

    All the melted steel will be exported to China, China will make knives out of it, and the U.S. can buy them at Walmart

  18. avatar Bob says:

    Their final solution will be to cut off the hands of every British subject, to keep them from killing each other with their bare hands. What will it take before rational thought enters the discussion of this issue?

    1. avatar 2004done says:

      Bob: Rational thought and (Gun/ Knife/ pencil/ fork/ toothbrush/ rock/ knuckle – choose any) control are mutually exclusive.

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