Question of the Day: Does Your Significant Other ‘Let’ You Buy Guns?

As if living in a state where gun buyers have to get permission from the government to exercise their right to keep and bear arms isn’t bad enough, God family and guns assumes heterosexual male gun buyers have to get permission from their wife/GF/significant other to purchase a firearm. True story? Meanwhile, the video below makes the key point that . . .

guns for guys are like shoes for women. Putting sexist assumptions aside (what guy can resist a pair of Bruno Magli loafers), I reckon that about covers it. If you have to justify your gun purchases to She Who Must Be Obeyed [/sarc?], what arguments do you use?

comments

  1. avatar Snatchums says:

    Well apparently OJ can resist a pair of them ugly ass shoes.

    No, don’t need a permission slip from the girlfriend just like she doesn’t need a permission slip from me when she wants something.

    1. avatar Nigel the expat says:

      “…don’t need a permission slip from the girlfriend just like she doesn’t need a permission slip from me when she wants something.”

      ^ That.

      My wife and I are both fiscally responsible. We don’t screen each others purchases. Bills met, savings met, investments met? Enjoy your money.

      I wouldn’t be married to a ‘let me buy’ person.

  2. avatar canuck_in_ca says:

    First rifle: pest control (coyotes)
    Second rifle: pest control (rabbits)
    Pistol: birthday
    Shotgun: pest control (rattlesnakes/crows)

  3. avatar Tile floor says:

    Nope. But I can see why. I have 17 and we have a 7 month old son. It would be selfish of me to buy more guns when I could use the money for him.

    1. avatar Ragnarredbeard says:

      Yes, couple of years from now he’ll need his own guns. Start saving now.

  4. avatar Marcus says:

    A good wife never ask you to chose between her and your guns.

    1. avatar Ironhead says:

      Had an ex girlfriend try that. Get rid of your guns or i wont move in. Thats why shes my ex.
      I have a nice collection already, so i buy maybe one a year if something catches my eye.
      As for parts and ammunition, just dont go nuts.
      I respect that and she does for her hobby as well, so no issues.

      1. avatar AdamTA1 says:

        My goal is one a year but considering I feel like I have the guns I “need” it goes on the low priority list of what I buy. If I can save up a few hundred dollars I’ll get another one. I save up by buying $10 Walmart shoes and wearing them for a year before buying a new pair instead of buying $450 designer shoes.

  5. avatar Xcom says:

    Need to put it in perspective. If we are talking $500 pistol or $300 pump shotgun, not really a problem. If we are talking about a $2,000 rifle or $5,000 sporting shotgun, then to not discuss that with the wife is purely selfish and dishonest to the relationship.

    1. avatar PROUD chicano says:

      I agree. I also lmao at some of my buddies who’s wives don’t let them have firearms. It won’t be funny however if they actually would need one considering some of them live in sketchy neighborhoods.

    2. avatar uncommon_sense says:

      Xcom nailed it.

  6. avatar Gunrunner says:

    Two of the numerous keys to a happy 20+ year marriage
    1) Separate bank accounts
    2) Don’t-ask-don’t-tell policy on firearm and other personal purchases

    1. avatar Anner says:

      We took a different path: all joint accounts and a monthly allowance for each of us to do whatever we want. If I want something above my allowance, I sell a gun I no longer want. I’ve traded $2-5k in gun stuff in a week to splurge on something expensive, and the net cost to our budget didn’t exceed the allowance. She does the same with horse tack, musical instruments, and even occasionally a firearm for herself. 7yrs, a toddler running around, and it’s worked well so far.

      1. avatar Dave says:

        That’s what my wife and I do. We each have a monthly allowance. What we do with that is our own decision. It really is a better way to live as we don’t have to convince each other of the relative value of our individual wants.

        Not that that has always been the case. Back when things were a lot tighter and every dollar mattered, we cleared everything with each other. I don’t miss that.

    2. avatar olivehead says:

      ^This is pretty much how we do it. That said, if I died tomorrow and she got into my safe (to which she currently does not have access), what she found there would probably cause her to say “I wish that sonofabitch was alive so I could kill him.”

      1. avatar ripvw32 says:

        SOOOOOO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      2. avatar Anner says:

        This is also true. Guns and ammo have a much higher resale value than my wife’s hobby accessories, so over the course of time my accumulated “things” severely outweigh hers.

  7. avatar Soylent Green says:

    “what guy can resist a pair of Bruno Magli loafers”

    If anyone ever sees me in a pair of these, please kill me, because the aliens have taken over my body.

    Death before loafers!!!

    1. avatar Rick the Bear says:

      I’ve never heard of them and I don’t care to find out.

      But with your ringing endorsement, I’ll have to buy a pair. 8>)

      1. avatar Mark N. says:

        You must be out of touch. The killer of OJ’s ex and Mr. Goldman allegedly wore a pair, based on a heel or shoe print at the scene–and OJ owned a pair.

        1. avatar USMC Sgt. says:

          And OJ’s had blood on them that matched the victims. Plus they are really ugly!

        2. avatar Norincojay says:

          $400 shoes no thanks. Ski boots sure.

      2. avatar Katy says:

        Loafers are loafers, don’t need to know the brand to know they should never be bought or worn.

  8. avatar Code3Patriot says:

    I won the relationship lottery. We bought a house together but she never wants to get married and we keep our finances separate. I could come home with three new guns and have a pallet of ammo delivered to the front door and she wouldn’t bat an eye.

    1. avatar Illinois_Minion says:

      Pics or it never happened.

      I kid, i kid. You lucky dog

  9. avatar mike oregon says:

    My wife and I are a team, and she supports my interests and hobbies. 2 weeks ago she wrote the checks for a stag model 10L 22″ bbl in 6.5 Creedmoor. Plus a 6X24 ffp Vortex PST.

  10. avatar David says:

    I purchase a couple of guns a year. A couple of years ago my wife put me on gun “restriction”. We did have the need to spend money on other pressing issues so I understood. That Christmas she completely suprised me with a new SS 44 mag blackhawk. She completely understands my obsession, and supports it.

    1. avatar BLoving says:

      The wife says the next gun to be bought is hers.
      She says I have my carry pieces whereas she has none… yet… and she’s right. Can’t really argue with that. Money being tighter than I’d like this year means she’s still waiting for her first EDC and I’ll be waiting till after that for my next one.
      As a consolation, we were discussing during out evening walk the other night the type and style of holster she’d like me to make for her. “Green! With Celtic knotwork embossing!” Clearly she’s going the open-carry route and wants something with character. Cool.

  11. avatar Kendahl says:

    A friend of mine had a Corvette when he was young and always wanted another. When he reached middle age, all the major debts had been paid off which meant that he could finally afford one. His wife asked why since they already owned enough vehicles to meet their needs for transportation. In return, he asked her why she owned so many pairs of shoes. End of discussion.

    Couples should discuss large expenditures beforehand. But it’s selfish and disrespectful for either of them to object to the other’s toys as long as they can afford them.

    1. avatar uncommon_sense says:

      +1

  12. avatar PRK543 says:

    Within reason. As long as all the bills are paid and we have no big expenses on the horizon, then I am good to go. I try to spread my purchases out a bit, especially when buying new.

  13. avatar ActionPhysicalMan says:

    We both have an allowance that we can spend any way we want. No justifications are necessary.

  14. avatar strych9 says:

    Not only does my wife “let” me buy guns for myself, she’s so gracious that she let’s me buy guns for her!

  15. avatar No one of consequence says:

    She doesn’t fuss about my gun purchases, I don’t fuss about her Stampin’ Up purchases.

    We simply agreed that my collection fits in the existing safe, and hers fits inside her home office. (Which reminds me, it’s time to reorg the safe again…)

  16. avatar bryan1980 says:

    No problem with the wife, but I’d have to have this thing called “discretionary income” to buy any. BTW, I’ve heard wonderful things about that, maybe in another 20 years or so, when my kids are out of the house, I might have some of that, too.

  17. avatar KMc says:

    No problem here, I own the LGS lol!

    1. avatar KMc says:

      And I just picked up a NOS MK6M last night.
      Right place, right time.

  18. avatar John says:

    No permission required. But when I come home with a new firearm the first words out of her mouth are “where’s mine?”!

  19. avatar David says:

    It is always better to ask for forgiveness then get permission.
    There is also the well used phrase” New gun, this old thing? Been in the bottom of the safe forever. Just cleaning it up!”

    1. avatar matt says:

      I won’t buy one if we’ve discussed not buying guns for now or avoiding big purchases, but when I do have permission I run with the old “no babe, it has been in the safe for a long time now”. That gets easier the long I’ve owned guns.

      Though right now I am plumb out of safe space. Though I suspect I might be able to squeeze one more in if I flip a couple of them upside down.

      I suspect, unless she takes to shooting (fingers crossed) the best I am going to get away with is an 18-25 gun safe in the master bedroom closet (once that is built) and a 18-25 gun in the basement and whatever I own BETTER fit in those two. So some year once my collection reaches the confines of them, I am SOL, time to sell something to make room. Right now I’ve got a 10 gun mashed with 8 (well, 7 and a ML) in it.

      Also have to hold off on getting a bigger safe as “it isn’t in the budget”. Which she is kind of right about since I don’t want to get a cheap POS.

  20. avatar Ogre says:

    I’m divorced and no longer need the approval of CinC Home for anything. When I was married, anything I wanted came under her microscope and was closely questioned. There were other issues, too. So I didn’t have much that she didn’t consider essential to family needs (just to ensure domestic tranquility). Now I do. As to the loafers, I’ll pass at $450/pr. I’ve never been much of a clothes horse

  21. avatar AndrewinVA says:

    what guy can resist a pair of Bruno Magli loafers?

    Easy.. a heterosexual one.

    1. avatar Timothy says:

      You… think that O.J. Simpson was gay?

      1. avatar John says:

        It would explain why he’d kill a fine piece like Nicole…

  22. avatar Chris T in KY says:

    My wife had three guns before we met. I had no guns. Now we have 9 more. I plan on getting 5 more. And she knows it. She turned me on and now I’m in charge of the guns now.
    But she does tell me how much I can spend!!!!

  23. avatar Mark N. says:

    My wife, generally speaking, hates guns or the sight of guns, but that seems to be limited to my Kahr/semi-auto pistols, and I make sure she has never seen the “other” guns that would send her into a tizzy. She likes my Colt clones since they are Civil War replicas (mostly), and has encouraged me to buy another black powder rifle kit since I so enjoy building the one I bought. I used to have a travel account at my last full time job where I accumulated funds to buy guns and ammo “under the radar” that had no effect on the joint household needs. Two of those guns have gone to my son, and I’ve bought two for my daughter. And to be fair, the most expensive gun I’ve purchased to date was around $700 (plus tax, DROS and transfer fees on top).

    1. avatar uncommon_sense says:

      Mark N.,

      I am sorry to hear that your wife is so unsympathetic about certain firearms that you own.

      Any possibility that you can smooth that over???

  24. avatar Ragnarredbeard says:

    I have a co-worker whose wife controls his spending, not just on guns but on EVERYTHING. The last time he ordered ammo and some gun stuff he had to wait until his wife went to Korea to visit her family. Poor guy can’t even buy a new starter for his quad because his wife won’t let him.

    Can’t tell you how many times I’ve told him to man up. His wife doesn’t work and he’s spending his own money but he lets her boss him around. That p*ssy (which he gets rarely) must be made of gold.

  25. avatar The Gray Poseur says:

    I watched the whole video. Nowhere was a Sig P320 drop tested. You guys are slipping. At least the ladies weren’t wearing armor and eye protection.

  26. avatar Larry says:

    No . I don’t ask permission to buy much of anything , including my Rolex . If she ever says anything , i just say ” I’ll get you one too if you wish.”

  27. avatar Wiregrass says:

    It is kind of a moot point since my wife and I agree to discuss any major purchase, and by that I mean anything over about $150 bucks. It is just a matter of making sure the money is in the right place at the right time and making sure finances don’t ever become a problem in the marriage. I have to “let” her buy stuff too.

  28. avatar matt says:

    Yes and no. My wife originally encouraged me to own guns as my family hasn’t since my grand parents were kids. It was years after we were married and moved rural. About a year after we moved she encouraged me to take up hunting. Well it went from 1 muzzleloader at first to 7 guns, a ML and a crossbow in under 2 years. Makes here nervous that I am obsessed as she just doesn’t understand (she tried to wrap her head around the “kitchen knife” comparison, but I just don’t think she can). She also just generally isn’t comfortable around them. That said, she is fine with me teaching the kids to shoot and has even finally said she will let me take her to the range/trap shooting, so she can actually learn to use them, when the kids start school this fall.

    So…I guess you could say I probably would have felt like I had to ask her permission to own guns period at the start, but it wasn’t something I ever broached with her, she brought it up. Yeah, it is a right, but it is still a large change that can be expensive and also adds some element of danger (we have kids, and yes with safe storage and all that the risk is minimal, but they are OUR kids, not mine). We have a relationship where we discuss things that one or the other or both of us think is a big deal. Usually it is letting the other know and not asking permission, but sometimes we do disagree and find some kind of compromise.

    I DO ask her permission before buying new guns. Not on specific purchases usually, but more “is it okay if I buy something if it catches my fancy/I feel I need it?”

    She doesn’t really want to be told when I buy a gun. Like right now I am on a “no new guns” diet. That is from financial reasons cause we are doing a big renovation to our house which is sucking up all our money (and then some!) I am sure in 6-12 months things can relax a little and I can look for a Ruger American Rimfire for my oldest (so that I can also use it by swapping the butt pad).

  29. avatar uncommon_sense says:

    We lack any significant amount of discretionary income at our household. Making matters worse, there were two huge unplanned expenses which ensured that we could not “throw caution to the wind” with respect to buying something that wasn’t truly a necessity. Thus, my spouse and I discussed and agreed on a few basic firearm purchases and no more.

    Beyond that, I have scrimped and saved money in various ways adding up to something like $150 per month and I use that money to purchase specific inexpensive firearms here and there … firearms that have a lot of utility now and in the future. And if we get into a tight spot, I could always sell those firearms for very close to what I paid for them. Meanwhile, I have them on hand and they have a lot more utility than $1,200 stuffed under the mattress.

  30. avatar former water walker says:

    After 30years together I get very little flack. And I’d love to buy more firearms for my wife. RF is this some kind of veiled lament on your matrimonial/GF problems?!?😜

  31. avatar RidgeRunner says:

    Guns fall into the same money pit as tree stands, seed, tractor implements, camo, etc., etc. She has fallen in love with my new Polaris Ranger, though, and it makes me happy.
    She has her own money pits with the horses, which never ends, either. Plus just “stuff” she buys that I’ll never understand. But she’s not big into clothes, jewelry, makeup, shoes, etc.
    Thankfully, I’m the earner, I make the calls, and I make enough to support both of our passions, and live in an awesome place that allows us to enjoy them without leaving the homestead.

  32. avatar BradP says:

    Meh, wife bought me a Ruger RPR in .308 for father’s day so…

  33. avatar Timothy says:

    I have a full time job and all of that money is joint and nondiscretionary. I also have a position in the Reserves which IS discretionary, but usually we use that for vacations and/or home improvements. Then finally I donate plasma. Since I’m selling my body, the money I get from that is mine. It’s not bad, about $300 a month.

    1. avatar uncommon_sense says:

      Where do you get that much money for donating plasma? How much do they pay at each visit?

      1. avatar Timothy says:

        I donate in Layton UT at a Biolife. I get $30 for the first visit and $40 for the second. Can only go twice a week. It adds up fast.

  34. avatar Ralph says:

    I don’t have a “significant other,” and thus I have no problems buying what I want when I want it.

    Moreover, if I had to choose between a significant other and hemorrhoids, I’d pick hemorrhoids as the lesser pain in the ass.

  35. avatar Aven says:

    I have been married nearly 50 years and we each buy what we want to buy. She hates motorcycles and guns but she lives with it. When I ride my bike through isolated and desolate coal field country, I feel the need for protection. I can’t get my wife to buy anything for herself except for a new SUV she wanted last year that she wrote a check for.

  36. avatar Jeff says:

    Mine likes to refer to everything she buys for herself in terms of “new shoe money” including several of her own 2A items. She has her share of big girl toys in the gun safe alongside my big boy toy collection. I’d be lying if I said we don’t have the occasional budget debate, but ultimately we find a way to save up for what we want.

    Find a life partner that either understands or shares your interests and as Hickok45 would say “Life is good” LOL

  37. avatar Manny A. says:

    Not a problem as long as we have our bills covered, not really expensive, and have a need for an additional one. Wife has never asked me to sell one.

  38. avatar little horn says:

    i don’t “let” her do anything. she does not need my permission, even though she does get it first as do i, to do what she wants within reason, nor do i. its called a RELATIONSHIP. where as most peoples marriage is more like a dictatorship. and we all know how those end.

  39. avatar Klause Von Schmitto says:

    My wife just dropped 580 dollars on a handbag. There’s no way she’s “letting” me buy anything. Once our bills are paid she has her fun money and I have mine.

  40. avatar S.Crock says:

    Guns are my significant other so… yes.

  41. avatar Lew says:

    My wife dislikes guns, does not like noise or anything about them…I purchase the on the down low, but she really knows…(ammo and reloading stuff all over the garage). Funny thing is she supports it but does not approve if that makes sense…she tolerates the fact that the back yard is littered with steel targets at various ranges. She just mentioned teaching the 8 year twins (girls) how to shoot. So I guess the rule of thumb is “don’t ask, don’t tell”.

  42. avatar RockOnHellChild says:

    I discuss purchases with my wife, as she does with me, because we are partners and that is what partners do.

    “Let” has nothing to do with it.

  43. avatar Hoodlum says:

    I am lucky to have my wife. As long as there aren’t any major expenses coming up. She doesn’t care if I buy another firearm. She ordered me a savage one year for Christmas due to local GS not having anything for us leftys. A stainless 7mm with a really nice vortex scope.

  44. avatar Martin says:

    I guess I’m one of the lucky b******s because I’m the one who has to limit what we spend on guns’n’stuff. My other half, when asked by gunshop staff what she wants, tends to make a wide gesture that includes most of what’s on display 🙂

  45. avatar FlamencoD says:

    I never ask permission. I think that is ridiculous considering I run the finances in our household. But, I purchase an average of about 2-3 guns per year since 2014 when I got my first gun. This year will probably be a 1-gun year (picked up a Kimber 9mm 1911 in June). Anyway, my strategy is that when something catches my eye I will tak about it to her several times over a period of a few weeks while I watch prices. Then I buy it. She gives me a hard time and I remind her of the good price I paid and that it holds its value really well. After a couple times of her complaining, she’s over it. It’s not asking permission nor for forgiveness because I did nothing wrong. It’s buying a gun I want, listening to her complain a couple of times then move on. She knows I wouldn’t buy it if we didn’t have the money.

  46. avatar Darkman says:

    Not a real issue in our house. She buys tools which she had more of than I did when we met. Knows how to use all of them too. I buy guns ammo and more safes. She’s damn good with the guns too.

  47. avatar Arizona Free says:

    I have trained my wife well. At first she was averse to the larger caliber handguns but after watching events on TV and our proximity to any help from 911 she has a new understanding. My next challenge is to show her cycling my Henry rifle has just two fluid movements not the eight or nine she manages to create. It is a sight to behold.

  48. avatar Slow Joe Crow says:

    My wife and I negotiate large purchases, also sometimes it’s actually her gun, since the .22 pistol was her favorite range toy, until she took over the 10/22. Sometimes it’s a quid pro quo, I got a gun, she is promised a new mountain bike before the next gun.

  49. avatar Justin Case says:

    When my wife was trying to convince me to quit smoking, she came up with the brilliant idea that I could take the money I spent every week on cigarettes & spend it on myself. Anything I wanted. Anytime. Since I was about ready to quit anyway, I agreed.
    So I’ve been paying myself $50 a week in cash to not smoke cigarettes for the last 10 years. But just to keep it slightly on the down-low, I started out buying mostly black pistols because I know she can’t tell the difference between any of them.

  50. avatar Dave Lewis says:

    Mother and I are reasonably secure – the house and car are paid off, we have good health insurance and have a pretty good contingency fund in the bank. I’m collecting civil service retirement and I’m double dipping by still working full time. I also have a VA disability payment every month. Momma took early (age 62) social security and works part time. Our expenses are moderate and we eat well, take a nice vacation every year, and give to our church and various charities.

    Since we’re not really hurting for money – and it took us a lot of years to get to that point – we indulge ourselves for hobby stuff as long as its within reasonable limits. Marge does a couple of professional conferences every year and she’s active in a number of civic and faith based organizations. Most of the money that she spends comes out of her part time job and the rest goes back into the contingency fund. I stash away my Discover Card cash back payments, rebates, gifts, bonuses, and any part time or overtime work payments that I might earn. That’s my mad money fund. Over the past few years I’ve bought one pistol and one long gun every year out of that fund. This year I did a Browning 1911/22 and a DPMS Oracle .308. I buy my ammunition and reloading supplies as I can without a lot of discussion. When I buy a gun Marge says “That’s cool – when can I shoot it?” She really likes that Browning – I may need to buy her one or just give her the one that I bought.

    We celebrated our 41st anniversary in June and I’ve been blessed to have a wife who has worked hard to benefit our relationship. We give each other the space that we need to enjoy our interests and we don’t micro manage what the other person is spending.

  51. avatar Docduracoat says:

    I am a very lucky man
    my wife into guns as well
    We discuss any purchases over about $100
    I’m pretty much able to buy anything I want
    She even brought me an Arsenal AK for Father’s Day one year
    I just bought the CZ scorpion Evo paid the $200 tax stamp and bought the folding stock
    She tells me I have to wait a month or two to buy the silencer and it’s tax stamp
    We have other expenses that come first but I am certain that I will eventually get everything on my wish list

  52. avatar RCC says:

    She comes to the gun shop with me. Has been known to spend more than me at times. We discuss if it’s a multi thousands purchase. My last purchase two weeeks ago was her suggestion.

    Only restriction these days since we moved to smaller house is where is it going to go as I have spare bedroom / office rather full plus shed full of heat hunting and reloading equipment.

  53. avatar Nynemillameetuh says:

    I’m not a numale bugman that needs permission to buy what I want…nor do I derive any sense of masculinity from my consumer choices. That being said, I can’t wait to build my garage gym this weekend. The barn mats have given my a garage a lovely rubbery hardware store smell.

  54. avatar chainsawferret says:

    my wife’s only questions are-can we afford it, and can she use it? The second is problematic with some firearms, she’s petite with small hands. And needs to be lefty friendly if possible.

  55. avatar CCDWGUY says:

    No, if I see something I want and it’s not going to screw the budget, I’ll buy it. I keep a separate bank account for money I might get as a gift or just extra funds and if I want something I take it out of there without any questions. Same with ammo, most of that comes out of my “other” account. She also has such an account and it’s the rest of our income and savings so at least I know what she is doing.

  56. avatar VerendusAudeo says:

    I buy whatever I want, and never have to justify my purchases to my significant other. Sorry, what’s that honey? Oh, that’s right…I’m alone…

  57. avatar CBI says:

    We have a very simple arrangement. We alternate which of us can buy the next gun. We wait until we can afford it. I got the last one, so she’s next.
    Married 35 years as of last spring.

  58. avatar anarchyst says:

    …it’s easier to beg for forgiveness than to ask for permission…

  59. avatar Cooter e Lee says:

    Girlfriend said no online bulk ammo purchases over 5 cases if I’m not home and she has to carry them into house.

    I blamed Hillary for making me do it.

  60. avatar todd says:

    Don’t know. I’ve never asked her.

  61. avatar Pickle Rick says:

    My money, my toys.

  62. avatar johnny108 says:

    Alternate our gun purchases.
    She gets one, I get one. The time it takes depends on how long it takes to save up for it.

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