Progressive radio host Thom Hartmann starts this segment by citing a couple of anti-gun studies. They sound authentic (even though they’re not) until . . .”Good guys stop shootings by armed civilians in the last thirty years? Zero.” Wait. WHAT? Tom then “debates” Former Navy SEAL Carl Higbie by deploying reductio ad absurdum, mischaracterizing Australia’s gun laws as non-restrictive and blasting his “guest” with the usual deluded bullying condescension, railing against the “epidemic of mass killings with high-powered weapons.” And then . . .

“The Second Amendment doesn’t give you an individual right to own a gun either.” HUH? Thom finishes his one-sided diatribe by telling a Navy SEAL the reason he (and other gun owners) have a firearm: they have a small penis. Yup that’s what passes for anti-gun agitprop amongst full-on gun rights detractors. It’s not funny, smart, relevant or [you gotta think] statistically accurate. Good thing the Second Amendment protects the first, right?

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107 Responses to Again With the Small Penis Thing

  1. It’s the 6th grade mentality. You disagree with someone and have no valid argument? No problem, just insult their body and try to shame them into agreeing with you.

    • Lol. Ive turned that fallacious statement around by asking if they know this from personal experience. I then ask how large a sample size of the gun owning men have they slept with to make this “factual” determination. Considering that there are tens of millions of gun owners, the sample size would have to be in the thousands in order for your statement to have merrit.

      • You are a gentleman. I asked her how many gun owners she’d f’d to discover this info. In the middle of a cocktail party, the F bomb makes things very quiet.
        She muddled something about “I NEVER HAVE.”
        “How ‘about now? Would now be a good time to f’k a gun owner?”

  2. They say the same thing about people who drive pickup trucks. Funny how the “pro-choice” crowd is so insanely anti-choice when we refuse to make choices they approve of.

    • Pickup truck
      Fast car
      Big house
      Money
      Modified car
      Guns
      Boats

      The only people they think have big peni are apparently minivan drivers haha. Meh, I’m Japanese. I’ll just start filing law suits for promoting racial stereotypes when they say that to me

      • Hey now, I’m driving the minivan for a couple days while schlepping the 4 chilluns (all under the age of 4) around. Wife gets to drive my pickup in the meantime:) does that mean I have to trade my big pecker back in when I get the truck back? I could get used to this thing…

      • You do realize that being Asian doesn’t make you a minority in the new liberal racial preference world. Being Asian actually makes you extra-super-uber white.

      • I wonder what they’d have thunk about my ’71 Mustang Mach One, 351 Cleveland 4bbl, aftermarket 5 speed tranny, factory mags and kickass (for 1979) 200 watt sound system?

        • If it was 1979 there’s a very good chance your ‘200 Watt’ car audio was nowhere near 200 watts.

          Likeley maybe 20 watts per channel.

          Very few car amp companies back then used switching power supplies to get high enough voltage rails to deliver a true 200 watt output.

          (That never stopped companies claiming huge wattage ‘Peak Power’ on the box)

          HiFonics or maybe Fosgate if memory serves were among the very first…

        • It might have been 200W, at 10% THD – rendering it totally unlistenable at more than 20-50W RMS.

      • Truth is we have those things because we cannot just whip it out in public to make them drool or jealous. So we are forced to strut like a peacock in other ways: cars, boats, and guns (oh my!)

  3. The ‘modern’ man measures his self worth through his sexuality and ability to sexually pleasure woman, the penis thing is just an extension of this shibboleth.

  4. The Right to a Small Penis.
    You don’t have right to inflict emotional, physical etc. because you don’t like your endowments.
    In fact it could be called, “Don’t be a Dick.”

    For those of you who just tuned in here is something I learned from an older woman when I was a teen. It’s how you use it. I repeat, it’s how you use it.

    Just like that other kinds of shooting, practice, consider what you’re doing, practice, consider others, practice.
    Just like concealed or open carriers, don’t let it tell you when to use it.
    You’ll get all the action you need if you’re thoughtful, considerate and caring.
    Don’t be SDD. Small Dick Driven. :):)

  5. I am afraid of you because you own funds and may be unstable and may suddenly start shooting me and everyone else within a ten mile radius.

    Therefore I will insult and belittle you in a way I think it’s smartly and clever and in a way calculated to make you upset and angry.

    The cognitive disconnect is so big it blots out the sun. Hasn’t anyone ever pointed this out to these folks?

    • I notice he made no offer or effort, even if off-camera, to allow the SEAL to establish the actual size of his “gun”. Either way the argument is specious because even if (which I doubt) the SEAL was packing an average to lesser “gun”, they all have HUGE balls.

  6. I had no idea there were progressive radio hosts. Didn’t Air America implode catastrophically? I think that Holmes guy still has a show somewhere but I’ve never heard it when scanning through the stations at any time of day.

  7. That guy is one of the biggest pricks I have ever seen. It’s no wonder that he doesn’t need to compensate.

  8. I’m always amused when the antis start with the penis thing. They are the only ones who seem obsessed with it.

  9. I stopped giving 2 s**ts about what these idjit “progressives” think about 3 years ago. But if they are so curious about my tackle and insecure about their own, i’ll be glad to prove them wrong any time they have the intestinal fortitude to tell that to my face. Got no problem dropping trou in front of someone with a ruler.

    • Careful…. I’m sure they’d love the opportunity to have you charged as a sex-offender, and yank two guns off the street for the price of one.

  10. Who? Never heard of him. No doubt he is hanging around hoping the fairness doctrine will be revived by the FCC, that way he can try for syndication to the radio stations that carry the conservative talkers. Even if this were to happen the best he could hope for would be a time slot after 8 PM.

    The best response to the “small penis” thing: Dude, your wife sure didn’t think so, and by the way the damned small size condom she pulled out of your night stand drawer didn’t last, so you might want to pick up a pregnancy test kit for her on the way home tonight.

  11. The only ones that seem fascinated (or threatened) by small penises are these anti-rights clowns.

    Maybe it’s because they feel threatened due to their own sense of inadequacy.

    This is a silly position and the fact that they even continue to harp on it shows that, deep down, they know they don’t have a valid argument.

  12. There was actually a discussion about this on a weapons board that I follow.

    Average worked out to something like 6.5 in. Which, interestingly enough, is about a half inch longer than “normal.”

    The suggestion was made that men with more testosterone (and therefore larger dicks) are more interested in guns.

    Anecdotal evidence, of course, but it still beats anything the antis have mustered.

  13. What is it about left-wing progressive statists that make them such penis-gazers?

    The only other group of people I’ve met who were so consistently concerned with the size of other mens’ penises were marching in SF’s Gay Pride parade.

    • “What is it about left-wing progressive statists that make them such penis-gazers?”

      They’ve never had a good one to enjoy…

      *snicker*

  14. It’s not the guns they hate, it’s us. These are real diagnosable clinical narcissists. They have the god complex full throttle. When we refuse to go along with what they(god) say, We are then, by definition EVIL. That gives them license to say the most cruel, insulting derogatory thing they can think of to us.

  15. What is it with them and the penises? I don’t think I’ve ever heard the pro gun crowd bring up genitalia when making their case.

  16. Wait a minute, did Thom Hartmann (I can’t just call him by his last name because it smacks of insulting Erich) just tell a fit former SEAL that if he did anything other than run from a home intruder that he’d likely be killed?

  17. I told my wife that more guns make your penis larger and she just approved a $100,000 budget for me to buy new arms. Wait a minute…

    • I think he’s a very progressive, commie liberal radio host. I watched one video where he proved how tyrannical and/or stupid he is by advocating that personal wealth above some arbitrarily low number should be confiscated by the government. Guy is a total moron. Pure socialist garbage.

      Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42EBAGLszwE

  18. Who cares why this guy is obsessed with penises? If every gun owner had a tiny micro-penis and every anti had a rolling-pin for a cock, it still wouldn’t help them when they get shot in the face – physics and all, you know.

  19. All you need to ask someone who makes this assertion is “When did body shaming become okay?”

    Speaking their language is more effective in making them rethink the stupidity of their argument.

  20. I use the following response to the pseudo-Freudians I come across.

    The Freudian symbolism surrounding guns is obvious.
    Men who fear and reject guns as “evil” are fearful of their own masculinity, and reject that masculinity as something “dangerous” which they cannot control. They are symbolically expressing a suppressed desire to be eunuchs, if they cannot be female.
    They often recite the mantra “Guns have only one purpose –
    to kill”, but they know that is no more true than saying their penis has only one purpose. Aside from the fact it is part of the two-purpose male uro-genital system, it can be used as an instrument of pleasure in love-making, or a tool of defilement and hatred in rape.
    They attempt to deny the fact of that duality, and recognize only the perverted “evil” view of the gun/phallic symbol, enhancing the guilt and shame they associate with their masculine nature. It is that masculine nature they fear and hate, and want to purge by becoming a symbolic eunuch.
    Of course, they realize how disadvantaged they would be as eunuchs among true males. To solve that problem, they propose spreading their symbolic mutilation by force of law. That way, they hope to make all competing males symbolic eunuchs like themselves.
    Those men who enjoy owning and firing guns, and take pride in their skill with them, are rejoicing in their masculinity. They do not feel guilt, shame, or any inadequacy in their masculine nature, but are both happy and proud to be male.

    “Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.” — Sigmund Freud (attributed)

    “No symbols where none intended.” — Samuel Beckett

  21. A friend of mine at work who wants me to teach his kid to shoot, made a teasing stereotype joke about me that I took as a compliment . .

    “Fast cars, guns, and heavy metal . . Life in the fast lane.”

    I added , “And a young wife.”

    Life is good. Most times I think the Libs are just jealous because the biggest thrill they get on most days is the new flavor of $7 latte at Stabucks.

  22. Well we all start out as girls. Does this dude think all guys should just use their fists to solve disagreements? Except in Jr. High most folks get over the size of OTHER mens junk. And he said this to a SEAL. DUH…

  23. That study is ridiculous. You could also find some stupid study that found non-gun owners are X times more likely to go to church, or be bullied, or people who don’t own guns are five times more likely to NOT say anything if someone cuts in line in front of them. Or non-gun owners are .004% to not even know what the middle finger means!
    This study is simply identifying personality traits of gun owners. If they had any brains whatsoever, they could do the same thing with MMPI tests. 99% of gun owners would not like the job of being a librarian. 82.6% of gun owners would like to be a forest ranger. 100 % of gun owners loved their mothers. 99.9% of gun owners don’t hear voices in their head. .001% of gun owners feel someone is controlling their thoughts.

    This stuff ticks me off. I’m going to go load my AK up with Torx® bits and go screw something up!
    Then to be super really bad, I’m going to exercise poor penis discipline and point my penis at something I don’t intend to shoot.

    • The MMPI is based on the “norming” of some Midwest farmers about 50 years ago. It’s as scientifically valid as comparing muzzle-loaders to M4s….

  24. What is it about gungrabbers and their fascination with our organs?

    We’re not concerned about their extremities nor what they do with them, are we? When Thom Hartmann spends all night polishing his boyfriend’s knob, do we care? No, we do not. Hillary Clinton has a bigger johnny than Hartmann, but do we pay any attention to it? No, we do not.

    And for god’s sake, gungrabbers, stop sending me those damn penis extension emails. I just bought another AR, so I have a new 16 incher. Enough is enough!

  25. Thom, you really ought to wipe your chin before going off on one your unhinged tirades. It distracts from the histrionics. That is saliva, isn’t it?

  26. Hey, Thom…if it is about compensating for lack of penis size, then please do explain Sara Tipton and other women who carry?

  27. As one who suffers from a dishearteningly small private bit, I can only say it has been my accumulation of large, high powered rifles that has given me back the self confidence and esteem i have been missing for so many years. I have tried therapists (expensive) and even thingie pumps (painful), but I have put all of that behind me. Thank you NRA, and thank you AMERICA!

    And to all you 2A haters, you’ll have to pry it out of my cold, dead fingers (if you can find it).

  28. Oh my goodness! Everyone thinks that men only buy guns if they have a small penis. Well, I don’t want anyone to think I have a small penis, so I am getting rid of all my guns right this very second.

    I read a comment on some other site of a gun owner responding to a similar “small penis attack”. I can’t remember where, and I can’t quote exactly but it was along the lines of “yeah, you’re right, I do have deficient genitals, they don’t spit out 147 grain jacketed hollow points at 1000 fps, and I’m tired of having to lug it around to just to beat muggers to death.”

  29. Penis, again. All antis think of is the penis. In texas they’re waving dildos, no doubt very used, around as a protest against guns.

    Grabbers are just plain weird.

  30. From wikiquote, Sigmund Freud:

    “A fear of weapons is a sign of retarded sexual and emotional maturity.”
    This is not a statement that appears in any translation of any of Freud’s works. It is a paraphrase of a statement from the essay “Guns, Murders, and the Constitution” (February 1990) by Don B. Kates, Jr.

    One of the statements by Freud which Kates summarized from in Dreams in Folklore (1958), p. 33, reads:

    “The representation of the penis as a weapon, cutting knife, dagger etc., is familiar to us from the anxiety dreams of abstinent women in particular and also lies at the root of numerous phobias in neurotic people.”

  31. Ok let’s get right. What Freud actually saiid was that people who are afraid of guns are emotionally and sexually immature

  32. Why do conservatives meekly accommodate the Totalitarian Left by referring to them by the Orwellian term “progressive”?

  33. Once again, Saul Alinsky makes another appearance on TTAG. The thirteenth rule: Pick the target, freeze it, personalize it, and polarize it. — P.126-129, Rules For Radicals.

  34. I’m not really interesting in watching the video but if he really did say, ““The Second Amendment doesn’t give you an individual right to own a gun either.” , well he’s quite right. The Second Amendment doesn’t give us any right, it simply recognizes an existing right and provides protections against the government interfering with the free exercise of that right.

  35. I drive a Tercel, and happen to be carrying a tiny .22 right now.

    My penis must be HUUUUUUUUUGE! I can’t wait to get home and show the wife.

  36. Blacks are always repeating the lie that blacks have larger schlongs than any other race,if that is the case,then why is every black male in the ghetto carrying a gun?

  37. This guy is a scam. Literally, his show is based on starting arguments with unsuspecting folks who think he’s legit, and then he goes off into nonsense, and by the end the guest figures out he’s been had and sometimes laughs, sometimes storms off. I wouldn’t call him a “progressive” host. He’s more like the “crank yankers” of talk shows. In other words, you’ve all been had.

  38. “You’re just compensating with your guns!”

    “Of course I am. If I could kill stuff with my d*ck from 200 yards then I wouldn’t need a gun would I?”

  39. I like Yankee Marshal’s response to those statements:
    “I don’t carry a gun because I have a small penis, it’s merely a coincidence.”

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