Sadie Bell isn’t really someone you want to disappoint. The 58-year-old from Southfield, Michigan was just convicted of assault with intent to do great bodily harm for shooting her long-time lover over a case of insufficient semen production. That’s right, Bell plugged Edward Lee in January after he failed to elicit what she considered to be a respectable quantity of ejaculate after a spirited session of sex. Bell took his paltry production as evidence that Lee had been fooling around on her, so she perforated his pancreas and colon with a round of hot lead reproval . . .
As detroit.cbslocal.com reports,
“She stated that she knew he was having an affair because he wasn’t producing enough ejaculate,” (Chief Assistant Prosecutor Paul) Walton explained. “She also said to the police some very graphic things about how she expected him to perform, she was a cheap date, she liked sex, she expected him to be able to do what he’s promised; and she said, in essence, to quote her, she was pissed off, so she shot him.”
Sadie’s planning to appeal her conviction, though, and Oakland County Circuit Judge Phyllis McMillen has set bail at $10,000. But given her history, prosecutors think putting her back on the street would be a big mistake. See, Sadie has a history of expressing her displeasure from behind a gun. Back in 1991, she shot her then-husband over God-knows-what indiscretion. That’s why the prosecution is trying to keep her behind bars.
“She has demonstrated that her past behavior is…to act out in violence, not necessarily with reason,” Walton said. “A normal person would walk away from situation when they felt they were being cheated on or leave — not take out a gun and shoot someone.”
So a word to the wise: if you’re a single gentleman of a certain age and on the make in the greater Detroit area, be sure to keep Sadie’s mug shot burned on your brain. And if you do decide to tempt fate and dance with the devil, stock up on those amino acid supplements, mkay?