Weekend Photo Caption Contest

retronaut.com

comments

  1. avatar Louis says:

    A little lower to the right. That’s it, scratch right there.

  2. avatar PeterC says:

    “Stop it, you guys, you’re tickling me!”

  3. avatar Dave says:

    They’re Stromtroopers; they’ll miss even frrom that distance.

  4. avatar tmm says:

    We’re from the Empire. We’re here to help you.

  5. avatar Bigred2989 says:

    So then I told him, “Aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?”

  6. avatar jwm says:

    Safe sex? How much safer can it get. We’re encased in laser proof armor from head to foot. Time we get this crap off we’ll forget why we were undressing in the first place.

    1. avatar lolinski says:

      Not arrow-proof though.

  7. avatar Bagdesnuts says:

    Ha! Your blaster was against my head and you still missed!

  8. Bundy’s daughter being brutalized by evil BLM Storm Troopers.

  9. avatar Another Robert says:

    Dirk finally figures out how to get Shannon to meet him for dinner.

  10. avatar BDub says:

    “I grow tired of asking this, so it will be the last time. Where is the Slave Leia outfit?” – Grand MUFF Tarkin

  11. avatar dh34 says:

    You idiot…I spent all day at the hair dressers’ getting ready for this party. And you..why are you just standing there…UNTANGLE US!

  12. avatar Mike CROGNALE says:

    That’s what I thought. Your gun is bigger than your “gun”

  13. avatar Paranoid Android says:

    “Haha! You’ll shoot me will you? Here let me help out. Seriously, why do they even give you guns? Why not just give up and dust off your halberd?”

    Worked better back with Pope Benedict…

  14. avatar Lucas D. says:

    “We understand, Ms. Fisher, but principal photography has already started and we really need you to put away the cocaine and get back on set immediately.”

    1. avatar Scott says:

      Winner

      1. avatar Avid Reader says:

        Agreed!

  15. avatar WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot says:

    “When I put my ear up to the muzzle, I can hear the oceans of Alderaan!”

  16. avatar 505markf says:

    “Stop it, you guys. All I said was I expected your guns would be bigger.”

  17. avatar John Taylor says:

    This is not the cow you’re looking for!

    1. avatar Gregolas says:

      These aren’t the cinnamon rolls you’re looking for.

  18. avatar Cameron S. says:

    “The Empire does NOT want to take away your lightsabers or your laser rifles.”

  19. avatar M. J. says:

    You do know those are really just dildos made to look like blasters right?

  20. avatar Morgan Y. says:

    “This is the sort of thing that happens when you register your assault blasters. They said they wouldn’t confiscate. It’s a trap, I said!”
    – Admiral Ackbar

  21. avatar AaronW says:

    “That hair is too strong for blasters. Let’s use towing cables.”

  22. avatar TheBear says:

    “Gah… your blaster is caught on my earring!”

  23. avatar Wes says:

    What happens to a disarmed populace: Empire Edition

  24. avatar Gordon Wagner says:

    “…the Empire restricts your magazine capacity to THREE rounds? OMG…”

  25. avatar JAS says:

    We are the Empire. We’re here to help so please do not resist. WE WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU.

  26. avatar bob says:

    she is saying use the fork, luke.

  27. avatar Gunr says:

    My buddy and me caught this kid out on Halloween night, without a costume!

  28. avatar Maineuh says:

    “I swear, I don’t know anything about the desert tortoise!”

  29. avatar Hannibal says:

    No police\hostage shooting one yet? Huh…

  30. avatar JasonM says:

    “Ow! That hurt. Maybe I should spend the next few years on drugs to mask the pain.”

  31. avatar defensor fortisimo says:

    “Aren’t you a little small for a stormtrooper?”
    “Shut up, it’s cold in here!”

  32. avatar michael kennedy says:

    Stop it or I will get my daddy to force choke you

  33. avatar 45acp says:

    In the futures, guns are outlawed and converted to advanced hair braiders.

  34. avatar Dgtk says:

    The emporor commands you to get your ewoks off the death star!

  35. avatar JackieO says:

    The Force is strong in this one.

  36. avatar David says:

    God, I’m high as *^%#

    [you all forgot it was the late 70’s]

    1. avatar defensor fortisimo says:

      That is physically impossible for anyone who’s ever seen the Star Wars Holiday Special

  37. avatar Bill says:

    No, seriously, both of us, at the same time.

  38. avatar DH2 says:

    Were the blasters supposed to be set for ‘stun’ or ‘tickle’?

  39. avatar NYC2AZ says:

    Still not as troubling as her making out with her brother.

  40. avatar PCC in CO says:

    Owe. It’s stuck in my cinnamon bun!

  41. avatar Matt Richardson says:

    Don’t get it in my hair! You know I HATE it when you get it in my hair!

  42. avatar Avid Reader says:

    We’ll only ask one more time: Where’s the dog?

  43. avatar Al says:

    They can’t get ammo for these things, either!

  44. avatar joel says:

    In the future, police officers in the Empire State will have cool looking uniforms, the latest in electronic weaponry, but will still miss their targets, even at point blank range.

  45. avatar joel says:

    That’s it! I can’t go through with it! You guys just look soooooooo stupid, this Star Wars fantasy threesome is not happening.

  46. avatar MiketheHopsFarmer says:

    The moment practical jokes pushed Miss Feinstein to become anti-gun.

  47. avatar Smoke Jensen says:

    Which one of you farted? That’s gonna itch when it dries!

  48. avatar Wassim Absood says:

    “Meanwhile, at the Bundy Ranch….”

  49. avatar Alex in IL says:

    It takes a REAL Stormtrooper to miss a contact shot!

  50. avatar Marcus Aurelius says:

    “LOL, you guys think I’m going down with you? I’m going to tell them you brainwashed me to think you’re the Tatooine Liberation Army and that you kidnapped me and forced me to commit this robbery with you.”

    1. avatar jwm says:

      I don’t believe I’ve ever seen a Patty hearst reference on TTAG before.

      1. avatar Tom in Oregon says:

        Wow!
        There’s a blast from the past.

  51. avatar S says:

    I don’t mind doing it with twins so who’s first I’m not a double act , But willing. Blasters in the cardboard batteries not included.

  52. avatar Bob says:

    I think I’ve got a Babel Fish in this ear. Can you give me a really weak shot in there to help me get it out, please?

    Ten points if you know where the Babel Fish reference came from.

    1. avatar jwm says:

      Hitchhikers guide to…..

  53. avatar William Burke says:

    Please help us save Kirsten Joy Weiss from the clutches of the Feds from the Death Star!

  54. avatar Les Brothers says:

    See how easy this can if cooperate, Again Now which neighbors and family members do you think may still posses “Weapons still”

  55. avatar Jon R. says:

    Princess Leia was arrest today by Imperial troopers for multiple charges including operating a X-wing while Intoxicated, wreckless endagerment of an Ewok, and Herding Nerf without a license.

  56. avatar dave g says:

    Now carl, i told ya before!!?

  57. avatar Delbert Grady says:

    The head grip wants the money from the cocaine he fronted you Carrie.

  58. avatar Roger McGaugh says:

    Darth Mickey demands that you wear the ears.

  59. avatar emfourty gasmask says:

    Yet another reason to move out of California, really.

  60. avatar Tominator says:

    LOL! I didn’t know those guns shot Jimmy Kimmel jokes!

  61. avatar Kerry says:

    Wait wait wait, so its Ok for YOU to have a gun, but not us? ROFLMSAO!!

  62. avatar Out_Fang_Thief says:

    Let’s get something straight princess, we’re bad-ass Stormtroopers of the Empire, got it! And our helmets do not make us look like two giant white penises.

  63. avatar Alan Longnecker says:

    Shannon Watts after finally achieving total civilian disarmament.

  64. avatar m0t0 says:

    “Aren’t you a little short for a storm trooper?” Lois Griffin
    “Stay here and rot you stuck up b*^ch.” Chris Griffin

  65. avatar Joe Taylor says:

    “Hey dude, dude… your blaster is showing”

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