A little lower to the right. That’s it, scratch right there.
“Stop it, you guys, you’re tickling me!”
They’re Stromtroopers; they’ll miss even frrom that distance.
We’re from the Empire. We’re here to help you.
So then I told him, “Aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?”
Safe sex? How much safer can it get. We’re encased in laser proof armor from head to foot. Time we get this crap off we’ll forget why we were undressing in the first place.
Not arrow-proof though.
Ha! Your blaster was against my head and you still missed!
Bundy’s daughter being brutalized by evil BLM Storm Troopers.
Dirk finally figures out how to get Shannon to meet him for dinner.
“I grow tired of asking this, so it will be the last time. Where is the Slave Leia outfit?” – Grand MUFF Tarkin
You idiot…I spent all day at the hair dressers’ getting ready for this party. And you..why are you just standing there…UNTANGLE US!
That’s what I thought. Your gun is bigger than your “gun”
“Haha! You’ll shoot me will you? Here let me help out. Seriously, why do they even give you guns? Why not just give up and dust off your halberd?”
Worked better back with Pope Benedict…
“We understand, Ms. Fisher, but principal photography has already started and we really need you to put away the cocaine and get back on set immediately.”
“When I put my ear up to the muzzle, I can hear the oceans of Alderaan!”
“Stop it, you guys. All I said was I expected your guns would be bigger.”
This is not the cow you’re looking for!
These aren’t the cinnamon rolls you’re looking for.
“The Empire does NOT want to take away your lightsabers or your laser rifles.”
You do know those are really just dildos made to look like blasters right?
“This is the sort of thing that happens when you register your assault blasters. They said they wouldn’t confiscate. It’s a trap, I said!”
– Admiral Ackbar
“That hair is too strong for blasters. Let’s use towing cables.”
“Gah… your blaster is caught on my earring!”
What happens to a disarmed populace: Empire Edition
“…the Empire restricts your magazine capacity to THREE rounds? OMG…”
We are the Empire. We’re here to help so please do not resist. WE WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU.
she is saying use the fork, luke.
My buddy and me caught this kid out on Halloween night, without a costume!
“I swear, I don’t know anything about the desert tortoise!”
No police\hostage shooting one yet? Huh…
“Ow! That hurt. Maybe I should spend the next few years on drugs to mask the pain.”
“Aren’t you a little small for a stormtrooper?”
“Shut up, it’s cold in here!”
Stop it or I will get my daddy to force choke you
In the futures, guns are outlawed and converted to advanced hair braiders.
The emporor commands you to get your ewoks off the death star!
The Force is strong in this one.
God, I’m high as *^%#
[you all forgot it was the late 70’s]
That is physically impossible for anyone who’s ever seen the Star Wars Holiday Special
No, seriously, both of us, at the same time.
Were the blasters supposed to be set for ‘stun’ or ‘tickle’?
Still not as troubling as her making out with her brother.
Owe. It’s stuck in my cinnamon bun!
Don’t get it in my hair! You know I HATE it when you get it in my hair!
We’ll only ask one more time: Where’s the dog?
They can’t get ammo for these things, either!
In the future, police officers in the Empire State will have cool looking uniforms, the latest in electronic weaponry, but will still miss their targets, even at point blank range.
That’s it! I can’t go through with it! You guys just look soooooooo stupid, this Star Wars fantasy threesome is not happening.
The moment practical jokes pushed Miss Feinstein to become anti-gun.
Which one of you farted? That’s gonna itch when it dries!
“Meanwhile, at the Bundy Ranch….”
It takes a REAL Stormtrooper to miss a contact shot!
“LOL, you guys think I’m going down with you? I’m going to tell them you brainwashed me to think you’re the Tatooine Liberation Army and that you kidnapped me and forced me to commit this robbery with you.”
I don’t believe I’ve ever seen a Patty hearst reference on TTAG before.
There’s a blast from the past.
I don’t mind doing it with twins so who’s first I’m not a double act , But willing. Blasters in the cardboard batteries not included.
I think I’ve got a Babel Fish in this ear. Can you give me a really weak shot in there to help me get it out, please?
Ten points if you know where the Babel Fish reference came from.
Hitchhikers guide to…..
Please help us save Kirsten Joy Weiss from the clutches of the Feds from the Death Star!
See how easy this can if cooperate, Again Now which neighbors and family members do you think may still posses “Weapons still”
Princess Leia was arrest today by Imperial troopers for multiple charges including operating a X-wing while Intoxicated, wreckless endagerment of an Ewok, and Herding Nerf without a license.
Now carl, i told ya before!!?
The head grip wants the money from the cocaine he fronted you Carrie.
Darth Mickey demands that you wear the ears.
Yet another reason to move out of California, really.
LOL! I didn’t know those guns shot Jimmy Kimmel jokes!
Wait wait wait, so its Ok for YOU to have a gun, but not us? ROFLMSAO!!
Let’s get something straight princess, we’re bad-ass Stormtroopers of the Empire, got it! And our helmets do not make us look like two giant white penises.
Shannon Watts after finally achieving total civilian disarmament.
“Aren’t you a little short for a storm trooper?” Lois Griffin
“Stay here and rot you stuck up b*^ch.” Chris Griffin
“Hey dude, dude… your blaster is showing”
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