Wanna Buy A Flare Pistol With An AK Heat Shield For $220? Neither Do I.

Image: Etsy.com

I swear I’m not making this up. This piece of junk is for sale on Etsy as a ‘Steampunk Bladerunner Pistol,’ and chances are decent that some moron will flush away $220 for a surplus Polish flare pistol and a wooden AK heat shield. Oh yeah: there’s two little brass bands on there too, so there’s that.

comments

  1. Hey, more power to them if they can find someone willing to buy it. It’s just not gonna be me 😛

    1. avatar SD3 says:

      For anyone who wants ‘steampunk’, buy a break-action Super Comanche in .45LC, NIB for ~$120.

  2. avatar Jeh says:

    That’s just sad.

    1. avatar Jim Jones says:

      Have you never partaken in the fun that is http://www.regretsy.com? This is far from the worse.

      1. avatar APBTFan says:

        I was seriously bummed when she called it quits for the site. Big time crush on April.

  3. avatar C says:

    i wouldn’t even call that steampunk. It would be more steampunk with zero mods.

  4. avatar A-Rod says:

    I get Steampunk but dang I could be more creative than that and charge less money.

    1. avatar APBTFan says:

      I’ve seen them call it steampunk and charge $100 for a $10 pair of Hobart welding goggles.

  5. avatar jwm says:

    This guy just came up with a creative way to make a little pocket money and do away with the evidence of his visit to difi’s DC compound.

    1. avatar tfunk says:

      That was actually pretty good 🙂

    2. avatar Ing says:

      LOL! You very well could be right…

    3. avatar H.C. says:

      I know this isn’t a caption contest… But give this dude a prize…

      1. avatar jwm says:

        Dammit! I’m always funny when it doesn’t count. My timing is worse than an RG revolvers.

  6. avatar Cliff H says:

    It doesn’t even have a Picatiny rail for my flashlight! Bogus, man.

    1. avatar Swarf says:

      Maybe it’s got a hang point for a lantern?

      1. avatar Cliff H says:

        Stop being funnier than me, it’s NOT cool! 😉

  7. avatar Jdawg says:

    Wait until a cop comes by the guy wearing this and plugs him.

  8. avatar Sean says:

    Id pay good money for a functioning blade runner pistol, but not that pile.

      1. avatar C says:

        Talking about building replicas out of real guns and guys altering the serials to match the film all the while having no idea that it is a serious felony.

  9. avatar Tim says:

    I have an Etsy shop. Where does one buy those surplus flare guns? I could make some hella steampunk stuff with them.

    1. avatar Chris Dumm says:

      You can get a similar Czech pistol from Sportsman’s Guide for about $70 with a box of flares.

      1. avatar Tony says:

        And then add a 12 gauge insert, booya!

  10. avatar Arod529 says:

    He didn’t even try to make it look like the Bladerunner Pistol.

  11. avatar Pete says:

    There is no brass on there. No idea what you are talking about.

    1. avatar Ing says:

      I think they’re actually hose clamps.

      Why the wood was kludged onto it, I don’t know… The flare pistol actually looks vaguely steampunk on its own, in a Victorian/Bisley-revolverish sort of way.

  12. avatar MattG says:

    I like his $250 “pneumatic repeater” even better.
    http://www.etsy.com/listing/112166083/pneumatic-repeater-steampunk-rifle-prop?ref=related-7
    It appears to be a red rider BB gun spray painted gold with some sort of air pressure gauge glued to the stock. He must value his labor very highly as there is perhaps $50 in materials and one hour of work there.

    1. avatar Swarf says:

      I’ll say this for him; the man knows his way around a can of gold spray paint.

    2. avatar Slicer87 says:

      The gauge looks like a engine compression tester.

      1. avatar Rich Grise says:

        I finally scrolled the pix and saw the gauge – isn’t that placement a little inconvenient?

        1. avatar Keith in TX says:

          Not as bad as what’s on the other side.

  13. so for $12 worth of stuff and 30 seconds worth of work, he is trying to make $200?

    and here i thought i had good get rich (not very) quick schemes….called work

  14. avatar Leo Atrox says:

    That monstrosity is supposed to look like this monstrosity?

    http://www.imfdb.org/images/6/65/Hero2.jpg

  15. avatar DrVino says:

    That is not a heat shield that is an upper handguard

    1. avatar Avid Reader says:

      Does that mean it’s illegal in 13 states?

      1. avatar DrVino says:

        lolz
        \
        probably not

        i was being pedantic

  16. avatar Rokurota says:

    The actual Blade Runner gun is a subject of endless discussion. For some reason it has double set triggers and what looks like a German spoon-shaped bolt handle — very odd for a semiauto handgun.

    http://www.imfdb.org/wiki/Talk:Blade_Runner

    1. avatar VaqueroJustice says:

      No discussion is needed. I’m sure that the prop looks like that for two reasons:
      1) those were the parts available (or closest to the prop master) at the time
      2) It looks cool.

    2. avatar jwm says:

      I can’t speak for the blade runner gun. But my understanding is that Mal’s pistol on Serenity has as it’s heart a Taurus model 85.

      1. avatar C says:

        I would’ve never have guessed that.

        1. avatar jwm says:

          I thought it might have been some version of the Ruger Blackhawk. Turns out I was wrong.

        2. avatar Swarf says:

          The Blade Runner blaster is apparently based on a Charter Arms Bulldog, believe it or not.

          Check out imfdb.org if you don’t already know about it. Fascinating site for gun folk.

    3. avatar Ardent says:

      I’ve been trying to work that Rube Goldberg device out (the original Blade Runner Pistol that is). I think the concept is 6 shot revolver with either a fiber or perhaps laser aiming device side mounted and with a cut down low capacity mag fed bolt action rifle on top as a separate gun, thus the two triggers.

      On the surface I can actually see a little of why this might seem desirable: A revolver can fire odd ammo types without jamming and thus can launch a variety of things that aren’t exactly bullets but also can rapidly cycle more standard ammo in a fight, especially if it’s caliber isn’t too massive. . . thus the rifle on top, much slower but conceivably very powerful (albeit with reduced range given it’s shortened length).

      It’s not something that I think would ever approach having the ergonomics necessary to be very shootable (nor can I figure out how the rifle on top feeds, apparently through the revolver from a bottom mounted magazine). It appears like it was designed entirely for it’s looks, perhaps with little thought given to it’s utility or even if such a design could be made to work but at the same time I can see why someone writing in fiction might have imagined such a cobbled weapon as a special arm for a character. In concept at least it’s sort of like having a master key under an M4, or even like a drilling rifle. . . it worked it actually could serve some specialized purpose (like using rifle rounds to penetrate armor).

      1. avatar Slicer87 says:

        In the film, Blade Runners are supposed to hunt down and retire (kill) renegade replicants who are illegal on Earth. Replicants are bioengineered (living) androids who are used as slaves in the offworld colonies and are much stronger and tougher than normal real humans. In the film it would take more than one round to knock them down yet alone kill them. So I would think if Blade Runners do use projectiles, they probably would use special rounds designed for retiring replicants. Though the film implies at times they use blackhole guns so who knows what kind of ammo if any that would use?

        Perhaps the “rifle” part is really the blackhole emitter? One trigger for projectiles and the other for blackholes? Though I would think such weapons would endanger the whole solar system.

  17. avatar OODAloop says:

    Now, what was the PT Barnum saying again? Oh yeah, “there’s a sucker…”

  18. avatar johnny says:

    First of all that’s not a heat shield but an upper handguard. And secondly, that’s for a SKS and not an AK. You’d think TTAG would know better.

  19. avatar Rich Grise says:

    I never knew that a piece of closet pole painted goldish qualified as steampunk

  20. avatar g says:

    Shortly later, Etsy was flooded with surplus flare guns with AK wood, all for $200. Haha.

  21. avatar KevinMA says:

    Doesn’t the AK heat shield makes this an “assault weapon”?

  22. avatar percynjpn says:

    Are you kidding – that thing is totally awesome!! Worth every penny, I say.

    1. avatar Swarf says:

      Welcome to TTAG, Mr. Brown III Esq.

    2. avatar Keith in TX says:

      Did you forget the /sarc tag?

  23. avatar C says:

    it might have potential if the handguard actually fit over the barrel and had…something else going on. I’m not sure at the moment.

    Or you could just go for this: http://www.dixiegunworks.com/product_info.php?cPath=22_92_187_189&products_id=14020

  24. avatar Keith in TX says:

    Or this for $300 made from copper tubing and hose clamps.
    http://www.etsy.com/listing/112167354/

    1. avatar Tim says:

      Wow, that’s terrible…

    2. avatar Cliff H says:

      From the jar, the table cloth and the bookcases in the background this is obviously the same manufacturer.

  25. avatar Keith in TX says:

    George Carlin was was right when he said “if you nail two things together that have never been nailed together before some shmuck will buy it.”

    One could also add that it doesn’t matter what it is, there is someone out there that collects it. Used bandages comes to mind.

    1. avatar Rich Grise says:

      In Japan, they have girl underpants vending machines, some allegedly “used.”

      1. avatar jwm says:

        i’m not going to ask how you know that.

        1. avatar Swarf says:

          He’s big in Japan.

  26. avatar Xanthro says:

    For $200 where else are you going to get Steampunk pistol with the shoulder thingy that goes up?

    1. avatar Cliff H says:

      These are obviously all being built by the same guy. These steamy punks must have an awful lot of disposable income and spare time.

      Some of them are interesting in an artsy sort of way, but that flare gun is just sad.

  27. avatar Russ Bixby says:

    That’s “Very” sad.

  28. avatar Joe Grine says:

    Its actually German, not Polish. It’s 1960s-era, manufactured by GECO. Usually sells for about 50 bucks.

  29. avatar Anonymous says:

    The seller is out of Washington DC, what do you expect.

    1. avatar Rokurota says:

      He is? Then these are all illegal because they scare me. Plus one of those gun designs has spent .22LR casings glued to it as part of the design.

  30. avatar Fug says:

    Yeah, that is just lazy. If these guys want to feel like Harrison Ford in Bladerunner they should just get a real gun and put walnut grips on it. Something like a CZ P-01.

    I’m a gamer but I don’t understand how some people get so worked up about fantasy. That is a lot of money for a toy that doesn’t do anything except look like a real gun to an ignoramus, I can just see the headline: “Autistic Child Perforated by Police as he Brandished Steampunk Blaster…”

    These things are getting so popular now with young adult dorks and the emphasis is so great on superficial “realism” and found items that it is only a matter of time before a kid thinks one is cool and gets into trouble. Where do you think Mr.Flaregun got that AK upper handguard? Not a positive trend.

  31. avatar zeos says:

    any genre crossing lune who falls for that deserves to be had. mixing steampunk and sci-fi is like mixing oil and water. the whole point of steampunk is that we never get to sci-fi because all the technological marvels are achieved with cogs and boilers.

  32. avatar Jim says:

    BRB, going out to get some old flareguns.

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