Nidal Hassan (courtesy wikimedia.org)

A U.S. military tribunal has condemned Nidal Malik Hassan to death for committing “workplace violence” in the name of Allah. Some four years ago, Hassan killed 13 people and injured 30 others at Fort Hood, firing his FN FiveseveN at dozens of disarmed soldiers. His “case” will automatically be appealed; it will stretch on for years, if not decades. That was yesterday. Today, Hassan’s death sentence has been punted from the first page of Google news results, currently topped by Kim Jong-un’s ex-girlfriend reportedly executed by firing squad . . .

The South Korean newspaper Chosun Ilbo reports that singer Hyon Song-wol and 11 others had been arrested on August 17 for violating North Korea’s laws against pornography and was executed [by machine gun] three days later. The paper reported that the condemned, all members of the performing groups Unhasu Orchestra and Wangjaesan Light Music Band, were accused of making videos of themselves having sex and selling the videos, which the paper reported were available in China.

My first thought: Charlie Sheen. My second thought: shooting’s too good for Hassan. But if it were sooner rather than later . . .

29 Responses to Hassan Faces Years in Prison, Kim Jong-un’s Ex-GF Not So Much

  1. Lesson for all you bad girls out there. Stay away from gangsters, goons and dictators. You only come to a bad end.

  2. I wonder what Kim Jong Un would do with our philandering politicians and their flock of floozies? If Hasan had pulled his stunt in North Korea, he wouldn’t have made it to an ambulance.

    The longer Hasan stays in the world’s eye, the more power is given to his cause. He is going to make out better than a Gitmo detainee.

  3. The little fat man’s wife had a problem with the ex. Probably caught him checking her oil.
    Hasan wants death so he can be a hero. Oblige him.

  4. I read another article that said Kim’s wife used to be in the same band that the ex-girlfriend was still in. There is some conjecture that she (wife) resented the continued popularity of the ex-gf. The comment I read was that if it was just pornography, they could have easily “disappeared” her into a prison somewhere, but that the extremity of this punishment likely indicated there were personal reasons for it.

  5. There are several people on the Army Death Row. All have been there for MANY years. Hassan will get an automatic appeal; that can take approximately his lifetime. Then he dies of old age. No paradise. No Virginians. Forgotten except as a footnote to history.

      • Old joke. The earliest I found was 2004.

        After his death, Osama bin Laden went to heaven.

        There he was greeted by George Washington, who proceeded to slap him across the face and yell at him, “How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive!”

        Patrick Henry approached and punched Osama in the nose and shouted, “You wanted to end our liberties but you failed.”

        James Madison entered, kicked Osama and said, “This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!”

        Thomas Jefferson came in and proceeded to beat Osama many times with a long cane and said, “It was evil men like you that provided me the inspiration to pen the Declaration of Independence!”

        These beatings and thrashings continued as John Rudolph, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans came in and unleashed their anger on the Muslim terrorist leader.

        As Osama lay bleeding and writhing! in unbearable pain an Angel appeared.

        Bin Laden wept in pain and said to the Angel, “This is not what you promised me.”

        The Angel replied, “I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you up here. What did you think I said?”

  6. Just release him into the general population of US soldiers doing time in Leavenworth.

    Problem solved, problem staying solved.

  7. I say let him rot. Refuse to change his diaper and let him pine for his virgins while he rots in his own stench. Throw him in a stone cell with a tiny slit of light so he can count the days and slide in a plate of gruel once a day. Death is too good for him.

    • Send him to Gitmo for lots of “enhanced interrogation”. Waterboarding, electric shocks, sensory deprivation, the who course. And when he finally dies, bury him in a pigskin. He is NOT going to be allowed into heaven dressed like THAT!

      • No, just let him rot in his own filth. He’s paralyzed and it’s his own damn fault and no one feels the least bit sorry for him. Send him to Gitmo, but just leave him alone to smell his diaper. Don’t give him reason for self vindication.

  8. WOW! North Korea is a tough town! Arrested and executed in 3 days. Justice handed out like fast food, eh?

  9. As I understand things, the president has to sign off on a military death sentence. Since Hassan is a muslim, he will not die so long as Obama is in office.

  10. Death is too good for Hassan, but whether he rots in prison or is executed, I hope his name is forgotten and buried. That’s the worst punishment I can think of for a deranged maniac who craved attention for his crimes.

    As for the fate of Kim Jong Un’s ex-GF… firing squad is pretty bad, but then again, it’s North Korea, right? Another article I read about the executions mentions another man was executed via MORTAR ROUND. They basically zero’d a position, and made the guy stand exactly on the spot they’d zero’d. Imagine the last terrifying minute of your life, hearing the mortar round get launched, and waiting until it obliterates you in 3… 2… 1…

  11. For an audience generally focused on the right to self defense, we seem to be very focused on the “right” to deliver revenge(yes, revenge) and justice. We’re lucky we don’t receive said justice.

    Flame now, if you like, but you and the Capulets are running on the same emotional juice that makes parents think that taking your guns is going to bring their child back to life. The end result is also the same.

    • You’ve hit on something I’ve been amazed by since the trolls and OFWGs discovered how to comment at my local newspaper (the Houston Chronicle)… buncha proud patriotic Americans who know you can’t trust the gummint to do a durn thing (health care, education, red light cameras, clean up the air and water) right… except execute people. And then it’s time for dancing in the street and bitching that we don’t have weekly hangings in Market Square any more. Let’s see… we can’t trust the government to regulate air quality, but we can trust it to execute people? I can’t track the logic.

  12. Well, torture’s illegal and immoral, but sitting in a cell ain’t no picnic, and I betcha even Bubba ain’t gonna be no friend to a terrorist murderer. So give him some time to reflect on his crime, let the appeals stretch out while Bubba and his patriotic cellmates remind Hassan what America is all about. And actually a firing squad would be too quick; doesn’t military justice still allow hanging?

  13. Next on the agenda – Trial of Hassan’s recruiter, his Cpt and Mjr promotion board, the Ft Hood post commander that issue the no firearms regulation.

    Then the cortmartial of Bradley Manning’ recruiter and the recruiter’s commander.

  14. You know, I thought the headline: Kim Jong-un was a joke. As in Jungun, like youngun. I really haven’t been paying attention to North Korea lately. Oh well

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