Weekend Photo Caption Contest

To honor the start of the President’s second and final term—not to mention yesterday’s  AWB unveiling—this week’s photo caption contest is an actual, you know, contest. With a prize and everything. The commenter contributing the funniest caption for the above photo will win a Drago Collapsible Backpack. The winner will be announced Monday morning. Probably.

comments

  1. avatar George says:

    Barack did not take kindly to the idea of the government coming to take his guns…

    1. avatar SD3 says:

      Kneel before Zod…

    2. avatar Paul says:

      WHERE’S MY TELE-PROMPTER, MO-FO?!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. avatar TACKLEBERRY says:

    “and you citizens thought i was only going to limit your magazines to 10 rounds” “still not using that healthcare though”.

  3. avatar Jordan says:

    Now hand it ALL over!

  4. avatar Chris says:

    ” there are white folks, then there are ignorant mother $?!@&$? like you”

    BANG!

    1. avatar JMS says:

      I like it! A quote from his book. Nice.

  5. Freeze bit@h….or the Constitution gets it.

    1. avatar The Angry Chimp says:

      You can take the criminal out of Chicago, but you can’t take Chicago out of the criminal.

      1. avatar SCS says:

        I like this answer!

      2. avatar Joshcalle says:

        “BREAK YO’SELF, AMERICA!”

  6. avatar Hermit says:

    Something something cold dead hands

    1. avatar Jeff O. says:

      Hilarious.

  7. avatar BradN says:

    I SAID nobody needs military grade weapons…except me.

  8. avatar Oddux says:

    You didn’t think naming Biden as his Vice-Pres was his only anti-assassination insurance policy, did you?

  9. avatar mountocean says:

    “I will do everything in my power as president to advance these efforts.”

    Direct quote in regards to gun control
    President Obama, Dec 13th 2012

  10. avatar Matt says:

    Say “what” again! Say “what” again. I dare you. I double-dare you, motherf***r. Say “what” one more goddamn time!

    1. avatar uncle nunzie says:

      +1 for the win.

  11. avatar William says:

    The tax man cometh

  12. avatar Steve in MA says:

    “Who said you could speak?”

  13. avatar Milsurp Collector says:

    He just took Executive Orders to a whole new level

    1. avatar bontai Joe says:

      That sadly has a large ring of truth to it.

  14. avatar Jumbie says:

    “I’ve killed 200 kids with drone strikes, but now I finally get to do one of you little bastards up close.”

  15. avatar ensitu says:

    “I love cappin’ Christians and Jews!”

  16. avatar Casey T says:

    Obama taking aim at his favorite target, the U.S. Constitution.

  17. avatar Josh says:

    Hahaha! You only had 10 rounds! Welcome to America, mother f*#ker!!

  18. avatar Ianmcall says:

    “now hand over your second amendment rights”

  19. avatar Michael R says:

    Commander in Chief Hypocrisy

  20. avatar Teez nuts says:

    Gimme all your money, or I’ll revoke your Bill of Rights. (with fingers crossed)

  21. avatar DAS says:

    English mother f*cker, do you speak it?!?

  22. avatar Josh says:

    Hahaha! You only had 10 rounds! Welcome to America, mother f—er!!

  23. avatar David W. says:

    “Of course I have a gun, how else do you think I got elected? My morals? My job experience? My ability to speak without a teleprompter? Nope, just threatened to kill people and take their stuff”

    1. avatar David W. says:

      Or

      “Of course I kill people! How else do you think graveyards in Chicago got 100% voter turn out rates?”

      1. avatar David W. says:

        “Vote or die bitch. The dead vote for me anyway”

  24. avatar kenjicon says:

    “Yeah… I got ’em covered. You guys get their rights.”

    You’ve just been Obamajacked!

  25. avatar .9mm says:

    Break yourself fool.

    1. avatar JMS says:

      Is your username .9mm? I didn’t know they made .9mm guns.

  26. avatar Rob G says:

    What are you going to do? Impeach me?? Ha ha ha ha!!!

  27. avatar no0bomafan says:

    Obongo Unchained

    1. avatar Ron Mexico says:

      Nice

  28. avatar Acepeacemaker says:

    “Allahu Akbar” – that’s all they ever say…

  29. avatar blahpony says:

    Chicago chamber of commerce: This fits us to a tee.

  30. avatar 1911moocher says:

    I hate Illinois Nazi’s

  31. avatar Augur says:

    “Can you tell how many rounds are in this gun right now? I’ll help you count them out.”

  32. avatar #2 says:

    “From my cold dead hands!”

  33. avatar Dan likes tacos says:

    Here are my first seven Executive Orders.

  34. avatar Bud says:

    “Exempt? Why of course I am exempt! I’m the President!”

  35. avatar Nick says:

    “Im taking Cheney’s advice and shooting first!”

  36. avatar G-Nibbles says:

    hand over your weapons! its for the children!

    1. avatar G-Nibbles says:

      “I’m Barrack Obama, hypocrite in chief, and i approve this message”
      also “Hello, Wayne”

  37. avatar ChuckN says:

    “Say hello to my little friend!”

  38. avatar Tony Preston says:

    Now UN are you going to ratify the ATT or do I have get gangster?

  39. avatar Dracon1201 says:

    Barack poves that gun control is a very one sided issue.

    1. avatar Dracon1201 says:

      Wait, what?! You guys actually thought I was serious about disarmament?!

  40. avatar John F says:

    By Executive order I have my own 1911 .
    And there is NO WAY to have a Background check.

    1. avatar John F says:

      “Where is that GUY in Arizona that was shooting at Barack Obama targets, a few months ago ?”

  41. avatar Ing says:

    Of course he’s holding a Glock. They’re all Glocks, aren’t they?

    1. avatar mountocean says:

      oh, that’s good. i had to read it three times, but it was worth it.

  42. avatar Henry Bowman says:

    “Get back to your designated free speech zone!”

    1. avatar JMS says:

      I like it.

  43. avatar htom says:

    “What do you mean, Rule Three?”

  44. avatar Jumbie says:

    “Ironically, while Barack came to believe in the personal right to bear arms in self-defense, his previous years of hoplophobia made him forget to release the safety on his gun just when he needed it most.”

  45. avatar Doug says:

    Obama to his golfing partner “I said that was a mulligan, do you disagree bitch?”

  46. avatar Saintsin23 says:

    Say ‘what’ again. Say ‘what’ again, I dare you, I double dare you motherf@$ker, say what one more Goddamn time!

  47. avatar DAS says:

    And then I was all like “pew pew!”

  48. avatar MOG says:

    “What makes you think this my final term”?

  49. avatar Dane Nielsen says:

    Obama goes ghetto to find kids for his next press conference..

  50. avatar gej88 says:

    “Hey Wayne, how are we going to break it to DiFi that we are range buddies?”

  51. avatar TNGib says:

    “I may be way out of Chicago…but I still know the Chicago way!”

  52. avatar Mike the Hops Farmer says:

    Bit@h I’m from Chicago, of course I’ll cap your azz.
    Or
    You think Cheney’s the only mutha ever shot someone in the face?

  53. avatar CJ says:

    “Last one with a gun wins!! ha ha suckers!”

  54. avatar Pascal says:

    You Will Respect My Authoritah!

    Or

    “President Obama having successfully crushed the 2nd amendment is seen here in celebration shooting a banned semi-automatic pistol in the air. Exuberant White House Staff can be heard in the background yelling ‘Oh, shit everyone DUCK!’ Anti-gun congressmen later commented, ‘ooooh, that’s how they work? We had no idea! — Wow! they look like so much fun, to bad we banned them. Senator Fienstien was reported to be visibly angry because the President had promissed her that should the 2nd amendment be crushed, she would be the one to shoot the banned pistol into the sky over Washington D.C. and like so many other promisses, the President broke this one too.”

  55. avatar JMS says:

    Now hand over the Constitution, and nobody gets hurt.

  56. avatar Jumbie says:

    “You can dress him up in a tailored suit that cost $1332, but a thug still won’t hold his gun upright.”

  57. avatar JMS says:

    “Here comes the change!”

    maybe add: “…you’d better start hoping.”

  58. avatar CmdrSlander says:

    “Rules, laws, always for the other fellow…”

  59. avatar USMC says:

    Vote or die muthafvcka, muthafvcka vote or die
    Rock the vote or else I’m gonna stick a knife through your eye
    Democracy is founded on one simple rule
    Get out there and vote or I will muthafvckin’ kill you

    I like it when you vote b1tch (b1tch)
    Shake them titties when you vote b1tch (b1tch)
    I slam my jimmy through your mouth roof (mouth roof)
    Now get yo’ big ass in the polling booth

    I said vote, b1tch, Or I fvckin’ kill you

    Vote or die muthafvcka, muthafvcka vote or die
    You can’t run from my .38 go ahead and try
    Let your opinion be heard, you gotta make a choice
    ’Cause after I slit your throat, you won’t have a fvckin’ voice

    Vote or die
    VOTE OR DIE!

    -From South Park Season 8, Episode 8

  60. avatar 556 says:

    Hand’em over… We’re better than this!!!

  61. avatar Dave says:

    Gimme all your dollars and im keepin the change
    or
    This aint how you hold dis fool.

  62. avatar ThrownunderabusinWV says:

    Hey Biden, side by side my ass!

  63. avatar eugene says:

    you may hate me, but i’m still going out with a bang

  64. avatar Jumbie says:

    “Back off, all of you. That backpack’s mine!”

  65. avatar Gary Slider says:

    LOL !!!!!!! The ban only applies to you peons !!!!!!!!!

  66. avatar CmdrSlander says:

    Enforcing tyranny, 230 grains at a time.

  67. avatar SubZ says:

    Political power grows out of the barrel of a gun.

  68. avatar CmdrSlander says:

    “Dianne was right… the Bill of Rights does make an excellent CCW qualification target!”

  69. avatar Matt says:

    Pew Pew! Take that, Constitution!

  70. avatar Martin says:

    obama unveils his new wealth Redistribution policy now “gimme your money you rich bastards “

  71. avatar Trends2000 says:

    Leave the gun. Take the cannoli….

  72. avatar Mrlyle says:

    “I`m sick of carrying guns and beating up women.”

  73. avatar CGinChicago says:

    Tax Please!

  74. avatar tadchipper says:

    From the homepage of change.gov:

    “The transition has ended and the new administration has begun.”

  75. avatar Jumbie says:

    “See? I don’t *need* an assault weapon to kill you.”

  76. avatar NickS says:

    “Disappointed with the GOP’s reception of his health care reforms, President Obama demonstrates his new plan to distribute bullets in an effort to encourage his opponents to give socialized medicine a try.”

    Or…

    “Moments before the press conference regarding gun control, President Obama could be heard saying, ‘Mine says Colt, point four five. Yours says ‘Replica’. It’s good to be the president!'”

  77. avatar Obongoaway says:

    Blat blat blat blat blat, 5 poppin 6 droppin muafuka!

  78. avatar JR LORENCZ says:

    Finally! The last gun in America!

  79. avatar Soccerchainsaw says:

    After reading Saddam Hussein’s autobiography, President Obama realized there was a way he could compell congress to do what he wanted….

  80. avatar Thomas Paine says:

    “Time for a reasonable discussion on gun violence”

  81. avatar Bill F says:

    “Time to talk. Player to player, pimp to pimp!”

  82. avatar CmdrSlander says:

    “In other news, the corpse of gun designer John Moses Browning was found today fifteen miles from his grave site, investigators believe it to have spun all the way there under its own power…”

    1. avatar uncommon_sense says:

      I do believe we have a winner!!!!!!

    2. avatar Soccerchainsaw says:

      Me likey too….

  83. avatar Jumbie says:

    “President Obama enjoys firing the first shot at the new White House gun range which he ordered built after his daughters reached dating age.”

  84. avatar Alan says:

    Dammit Joe, I said dance!

    1. avatar Soccerchainsaw says:

      Another good one.

  85. avatar Tacitus7 says:

    “Badges?!? We don’t need no stinking badges!”

  86. avatar 4strokes says:

    OK, front site, trigger control, breathe… Dammit Lapierre hold still!
    Now where was I? OK, front site…

  87. avatar Abqjohnny says:

    I am a gun owner.
    I believe that spending has fixed the economy.
    I believe in Obamacare.
    I take credit for killing bin Laden.
    Get a gun before the ban takes effect- I found one, figured why not.
    #Thetruthaboutguns

  88. avatar wheelgun says:

    “Got Gat? Not for long beeyatches!”

  89. avatar DerryM says:

    “I’M THE PRESIDENT AND I”LL GO OUT FOR A CIGARETTE WHENEVER I DAMN WELL WANT TO!!!”

  90. avatar Some Guy #7 says:

    Hands out of your pockets … so I can put mine in them!

  91. avatar Rick says:

    What term limits?

  92. avatar Steve c says:

    So this is what everybody is whining about? Wait…..this IS awesome! Hey, hey Biden, check this out!

  93. avatar jan says:

    Hey Michelle! Look what David Gregory got me!

  94. avatar Thomas Palmer says:

    Wayne LaPierre, You dont look so bad here have another!

  95. avatar Rick says:

    Oh look! A dog! Yum!

  96. avatar J.K. says:

    “Tyranny ain’t easy!”
    —————
    “Here’s shooting at you, kid!”
    —————
    Presidential Term 1 – “Hope and Change.”
    Presidential Term 2 – “Hope for Change.”

  97. avatar Ron says:

    No really, Michelle said Stalin used to hold it like this too!

  98. avatar Steve W says:

    “There can be only one!”

  99. avatar NameWithheld says:

    Joe! Dance you pasty fool, dance!

  100. avatar JD says:

    ‘who’s yo’ daddy’?

    Amazingly, Google Translate has Barry’s language Swahili !
    so,

    “ambaye ni baba yako”

    OT:
    if/when anyone’s up to it:

    https://www.facebook.com/PragProgPage

  101. avatar SpeleoFool says:

    “Sorry, I meant ‘Yes I Can'”

  102. avatar tron says:

    I said “bitch better have my money”.

  103. avatar ChileMan says:

    Say Hello To My Little Friend – The New Executive Order

  104. avatar Tman says:

    Dear Leader Barack, humbly accepting thunderous applause from millions of grateful citizens on Pennsylvania Avenue following his majestic fifth Inauguration Day speech, prepares an Executive Action for a “second amendment” terrorist discovered in the crowd by Dear Leader’s heroic Secret Service contingent.

  105. avatar Michael Horn says:

    “Good thing I’m not American, I’ll get to keep this thing!”

  106. avatar btc says:

    “I have a very strict gun control policy: if there’s a gun around, I want to be in control of it.” (originally – Clint Eastwood)

  107. avatar jay says:

    Gee thanks Joe, you know there is no way I could have passed that background check.

  108. avatar DisThunder says:

    Look Ma, no barrel shroud!

  109. avatar Nine says:

    ‘Biden, get your shotguns!!!’

  110. avatar Ropingdown says:

    “Now, I know what you’re thinking, Joe. ‘Did he load that NY mag with ten rounds or only seven?’ To tell you the truth, I forgot myself amid all this proposed legislation. But being as this is a 5.56 McChrystal, the most powerful cartridge in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you have to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky?…Well? Do ya, Joe?”

  111. avatar Al in OK says:

    You, flock of sheeple, you know why we’re here? Why don’t you tell my man Biden where you got the sh*t hid at?

    Say ‘rights’ again. Say ‘rights’ again, I dare you, I double dare you muthaf****er, say rights one more Goddamn time!

    Barack “Jules Winnfield” Obama

  112. avatar Steve W says:

    Say when

  113. avatar WHOISJohnGalt says:

    Let me be clear. I’m clinging to my gun and showing my antipathy to folks unlike me (i.e. non-Marxists).

  114. avatar Hidden Hills says:

    ‘Bama. James ‘Bama.

  115. avatar 16V says:

    I’m the man up in this piece. You’ll never see the light of… who the fvck do you think you’re fvcking with? I’m the police, I run shit around here. You just live here. Yeah, that’s right, you better walk away. Go on and walk away… ’cause I’m gonna’ burn this motherfvcker down. King Kong ain’t got sh!t on me. That’s right, that’s right. Sh!t, I don’t, fvck. I’m winning anyway, I’m winning… I’m winning any motherfvcking way. I can’t lose. Yeah, you can shoot me, but you can’t kill me.

  116. avatar jan says:

    …an attempted robbery became a homicide on Pennsylvania avenue today. The suspect is a black male, approximately six foot two wearing a dark coat and apparently armed with an assault pistol. The victims, we assume are also black males…

  117. avatar Double D says:

    “When the White House learned that President Obama’s ‘street cred’ had dipped drastically after inviting Justin Bieber to stay in the Lincoln bedroom, a bold plan to recreate his image got off to a somewhat tenuous start.”

  118. avatar Nine says:

    ‘Dammit Michelle, stop talkin’ about my small Glock!!!’

  119. avatar Matt says:

    Hey Bill! Stop eying the girls and put your cigar in my hole!

    1. avatar Thomas Paine says:

      yes!

  120. avatar WHOISJohnGalt says:

    “If they bring a knife to the fight, we bring a gun” (actual quote from Obama in Philadelphia on June 13th, 2008.

    1. avatar Evan says:

      Love it!

  121. avatar jimbo says:

    Vote for gun control, or I will pop a cap in yo’ ass.

  122. avatar WHOISJohnGalt says:

    Smoke ’em if you’ve got ’em.

  123. avatar Chris from Iowa says:

    Hard to pick…

    “Shut up before I wound you and leave you to suffer through Obamacare”

    Or

    “Think you can dodge this? You owe it to yourself to try.”

    I tried to work horses and bayonets in but I came up dry.

  124. avatar JAS says:

    “I took your gun and now you want to negotiate? LMAO!”

  125. avatar bob says:

    im not serious yet …
    just wait till i turn this gun sideways

  126. avatar Aynonymous says:

    A scene from Point Break II: Point Barack

  127. avatar BLAMMO says:

    “You won’t believe what I found in the pocket of this coat!!”

  128. avatar Bluliner says:

    “Damnit Michelle, I thought you were a Klingon…did you get a haircut?”

  129. avatar stokeslawyer says:

    This thing needs one of those shoulder things that goes up.

  130. avatar jan says:

    Fk you, Alexander Hamilton!

      1. avatar jan says:

        Thank you sir, you are a scholar but not a gentleman.

  131. avatar New Chris says:

    I know what you’re thinking, did he fire 7 shots or 8… well to be honest in all this confusion I don’t know myself…

    1. avatar 16V says:

      Being as I’m the 44th President of the United States, the most powerful man in the world, and can have you extrajudicially executed, you got to ask yourself one question. Do I feel lucky? Well do ya, peon?

  132. avatar jan says:

    …I rushed through the door, double tap, bam bam, and that’s how I got bin Laden…

  133. avatar Rob Drummond says:

    “Hiel………….I me Halt!!!!!!!!!…….ha, ha, ha, just kidding”
    Rob Drummond
    Hillsboro, NH

  134. avatar g says:

    Recent budget have forced Secret Security cutbacks… the President has now been forced to take care of his own “protection”.

    Obama: Ah, HELL no…

    1. avatar g says:

      Should read:

      Recent budget changes have forced Secret Security cutbacks… the President has now been forced to take care of his own “protection”.

      Obama: Ah, HELL no…

  135. avatar Rambeast says:

    “Instant dictator…uniform not included.”

  136. avatar Aharon says:

    2017: The Return of the Chicago Godfather.

  137. avatar 16V says:

    Great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather of President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho-bama

  138. avatar Aharon says:

    Bill Clinton! I told you to keep away from my girls!

  139. avatar NoSox says:

    “Shhhhh#*%t…..Secret Service ain’t THAT good!”

  140. avatar Nick says:

    “I was made for this moment!”

  141. avatar Rob Eide says:

    GUNS FOR ME—NOT FOR THEE!

  142. avatar My name is Bob says:

    “Now that I’ve confiscated all your guns…. SUCKERS!!!!”

  143. avatar George says:

    “And you thought I only had 7 rounds…hahaha”

  144. avatar NoSox says:

    “I wish a MF would come over here with that bullsh*t! John Wilkes Boothe my ass!”

  145. avatar Bill Shakes says:

    “this is so much fun it should be illegal!!!…………wait a sec I can make that happen, gimme something to sign!”

    1. avatar Jeff the Griz says:

      ***************This one has my vote *************

  146. avatar In Memphis says:

    Barack announces that he will run for a third term and WILL win

    1. avatar In Memphis says:

      My avatar disapeared, WTF!?

  147. avatar DrewR55 says:

    “Time to clear a few seats on the Supreme Court”

    “If Wayne runs that video one more time”

    “I know I won’t get flagged by the TSA at O’Hara”

    “If ol’ Joe lets his mouth run away one more time”

  148. avatar SDFreeman says:

    As you can see my laws or polices do not apply to me I’ll carry what I want but you can’t

  149. avatar Ralph says:

    “I told you that when we took over, we’d have to kill some of y’all.”

  150. avatar ProfBathrobe says:

    It’s not illegal when the president does it.

  151. avatar Rednutinc says:

    Let me be clear… everyone gets a fair shot!

  152. avatar RockThisTown says:

    “Oh yeah? Well I say there ARE 57 states!!!”

    “If this was solar-powered, we’d really have something!”

    Making Fidel & Hugo proud.

    “There you go again, Pilgrim.”

    “Hey, where’s the bayonet for this thing?”

    “I know what you’re thinking, punk. ‘Did he fire 13, 12, 11 or 10?’ And to tell you the truth, amidst all my lies, I kinda lost track myself.”

    “I told you this election was about revenge!”

    “I’m getting a third term whether you like it or not!”

    “This is how Michelle gets the kids to eat their vegetables.”

    When split-seconds count, and the Secret Service is seconds away.

  153. avatar Rednutinc says:

    I’ve got a dream too!

  154. avatar Sam Wright says:

    Hey Biden, hold my beer and watch this!

  155. avatar drewmsmith says:

    President Obama demonstrates how he will be a much more effective leader during his second term.

  156. avatar jan says:

    Mr. Obama was very excited about his new pistol until he discovered there was no ammunition available anywhere…

  157. avatar ceray says:

    “Dear Dick, When can we go hunting?”

  158. avatar Greg in Allston says:

    Yo, dude, I’m so gonna a put a cap in Yo’ Ol’ F…..G White Guy Ass if’n ya don’t get on board with my program, sucka.

  159. avatar Merits says:

    Don’t be surprised. I’m not going to pay higher taxes, drive a hybrid, or use Obamacare either.

  160. avatar Richard Chambers says:

    Who wants to give this nasty thing to Dianna to add to her evil Gun list

  161. avatar Don says:

    Brace yo self fool!

  162. avatar racer88 says:

    “Moron I be?” No, Mr. President… it’s Molon Labe!

  163. avatar AaronW says:

    “Mr. President, the gun isn’t necessary. Democrats just hand over campaign donations voluntarily…”

  164. avatar Skeev says:

    You musta thought it was white boy day.

  165. avatar uncommon_sense says:

    Obama to David Gregory: “How’s it hangin’ Dave? Oh you’re good … just messin’ with ya.”

  166. avatar Jeh says:

    This is what happens….when you oppose….my dictatorship…ladies and gentlemen.

  167. avatar uncommon_sense says:

    Obama: “Badges? I don’t need no steenking badges!”

  168. avatar Evan says:

    Did I fire 7 shots or 8? I forgot if I put in my Presidential, High Cap Mag today.

  169. avatar uncommon_sense says:

    Obama to George Soros: “Yeah I see Boehner. Should I do it?”

  170. avatar 2Savage says:

    Ever since Michelle read “50 Shades of Grey,” it’s the only way I can get her to put he clothes back on. She’s got me by 35 lbs., so I need every edge I can get!

  171. avatar Totenglocke says:

    “Term limits? Sorry, I just issued an Executive Order making me President for Life. Did you have a problem with that?”

  172. avatar Wilsontx says:

    “How ’bout I put a cap in your 2nd Amendment!”

  173. avatar Alltoy says:

    Come here and pull my finger!

  174. avatar Jason Campbell says:

    -Happiness-

    Being the only guy with a gun.

  175. avatar Liberty2Alpha says:

    Ah-ah, I know what you’re thinking, Clint. You’re thinking, “Did he fire seven shots or only six?” And to tell you the truth, I’ve forgotten myself in all this “empty chair” excitement. But being this is a .45 ACP – the most powerful handgun in the world and will blow your head clean off, you’ve got to ask yourself a question: “Do I feel lucky?” Well, do ya, Clint?!

  176. avatar ThatGuy says:

    Hey homie is that my briefcase….

  177. avatar In Box 485 says:

    “How black is that?!?” – Jamie Fox

  178. avatar In Box 485 says:

    Silly clingers… Guns are for Gubberments.

  179. avatar .9mm says:

    Whats that you say? From your cold dead hands?
    BAM BAM BAM

  180. avatar jwm says:

    As Hillary Clinton was walking up the steps to the capitol building to give testimony on the Benghazi incident and Fast and Furious a shot rang out. Ms. Clinton died immediately and a suspect, described as a skinny Urkel looking dude, fled the scene in a white Ford Bronco. The driver of the getaway Bronco was described as a heavyset white guy with white hair puffing on a large cigar.

    No arrests have been made.

  181. avatar Tirrus says:

    Don’t worry, there is nothing in the clip.

  182. avatar polarbear101 says:

    “this conversation on gun control isn’t over until I say it is”

  183. avatar scifigunner says:

    “Now THIS is what I call common sense gun control!”

  184. avatar Wussface says:

    No barrel shroud… I believe that makes this rocket launcher eligible.

  185. avatar Spoons Make You Fat says:

    “Ideas are far more powerful than guns. We don’t let our people have guns. Why should we let them have ideas?”
    — Joseph Stalin

  186. avatar SGC says:

    “You bring a knife…I bring a gun. You send one of mine to the hospital, I send one of yours to the morgue…THAT’S THE CHICAGO WAY!”

  187. avatar Spartandsk says:

    “If only I hadn’t banned the shoulder thing that goes up I could really use one right now”

  188. avatar Cliff says:

    “Mine’s bigger than yours…AND I’ve got brass balls.”

  189. avatar pat says:

    “Heh heh, never said I’d remove ALL the guns”

  190. avatar pat says:

    “I said turn over YOUR guns, not mine”

  191. avatar Tracy says:

    “No its cool officer, I only loaded 7 rounds!”

  192. avatar pat says:

    “Oh, you mean I’m supposed to point this thing in the other direction to commit suicide”?
    or
    “What direction am I supposed to point this thing to commit suicide”?

  193. avatar Z.G. says:

    Just for Men Touch of Gray Hair Treatment: $10

    Handmade Georges de Paris suit (with China made US Flag pin): $4,500

    “Leading the People” with my newly acquired Colt “Government” Model 1911: Priceless

  194. avatar Ty says:

     “Excuse me while I whip this out.”

    1. avatar Liberty2Alpha says:

      +1.

      Nice Mel Brooks…

      1. avatar 16V says:

        Son, you’re on your own…

  195. avatar Chuckfromsd says:

    SUCKERS!!! Now bow to your new King.

  196. avatar Evan says:

    “Obama succumbs to panic buying”

  197. avatar Ric Hubbard says:

    “Because I’m better than you, that’s why!”

  198. avatar Ralph says:

    “Somebody picked the wrong lefty pinko liberal.”

  199. avatar Harry says:

    “Inauguration’s over, what’d you think was going to happen the second time around? Watch, wallet, and guns… let’s go, hand ’em over.”

  200. avatar StPatrick_TN says:

    All these years I’ve been holding this stupid thing sideways in the manner I was shown by the local youths, back in my organizing days…I just noticed there were dots on top of this thing – anybody know what they do?

  201. avatar Brad says:

    This is the last gun left in America and it’s mine. You guys are a bunch of pussies!

  202. avatar ProfessAndObey says:

    The Commander in Chief doesn’t shoot from the hip.

  203. avatar James says:

    In his own words: “I won; get over it.”

  204. avatar Double D says:

    Always a quick learner, President Obama looks pleased with the results of James Yeager’s suggestions.

  205. avatar Teddy Ruxxpen says:

    Keep the change you filthy animal!

  206. avatar gojoe says:

    You’ve got to ask yourself, do you feel lucky. Well do you America.

  207. avatar gojoe says:

    He managed to be both every 7/11 clerks and Congresses worst nightmare. Bravo

  208. avatar Revolver7 says:

    I’m special. You’re not!

  209. avatar JCG101 says:

    Now that I have more “flexibility” time to take aim at my true enemy; people that think for themselves.

  210. avatar Cgzz says:

    Break yourself constitutionally protected rights.

  211. avatar Matt says:

    “Well, no one else wanted to enforce mandatory confiscation… so here I am! If you want something done right, do it yourself!”

  212. avatar mynewgun12 says:

    And I thought I had to worry about bad guys with guns, but this is even more terrifying.

  213. avatar g2 says:

    There’s this passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. “The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.” I been saying that sh*t for years. And if you heard it, that meant your a$$. I never gave much thought to what it meant. I just thought it was some cold-blooded sh*t to say to a motherf***er before I popped a cap in his a$$. But I saw some sh*t this morning made me think twice. See, now I’m thinking, maybe it means you’re the evil man, and I’m the righteous man, and Mr. 9 millimeter here, he’s the shepherd protecting my righteous a$$ in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you’re the righteous man and I’m the shepherd and it’s the world that’s evil and selfish. I’d like that. But that sh*t ain’t the truth. The truth is, you’re the weak, and I’m the tyranny of evil men…

  214. avatar Darrell says:

    … of course the peasants are revolting…thier peasants….PULL.

  215. avatar Michael says:

    Do you feel luck Republican, well do you?

  216. avatar Clayton says:

    You thought all animals were equal?

  217. avatar Jeff says:

    Say “Right of the people” one more time! I dare you!

  218. avatar Steve says:

    “The Constitution makes a great target!”

  219. avatar Sierra says:

    Here’s your “high capacity magazine”, Bitch!

  220. avatar karl hungus says:

    “no you can’t”

  221. avatar karl hungus says:

    “its called executive ‘action’ now for a reason”

  222. avatar karl hungus says:

    “…Playing with my money is like playing with my emotions, congress”

    -big worm in “friday”

  223. avatar Clay says:

    “Gimme all your money! Don’t forget the change!”

  224. avatar karl hungus says:

    “Good?… Bad?… I’m the guy with the gun.”

    -ash in “army of darkness”

  225. avatar karl hungus says:

    “Fill your hand you sonofabitch!”

  226. avatar Aaron says:

    This AK-47 belongs in the hands of soldiers, not in the hands of criminals

  227. avatar phantom72 says:

    “Why you Glock blocking me bro?”

  228. avatar phantom72 says:

    “This thing is SWEET! Go ahead and send 10,000 of them to Egypt…”

  229. avatar Aaron says:

    While I may favor common-sense gun control laws, that doesn’t keep me from reaching out to NRA members

  230. avatar Hal Thompson says:

    Allahu Akbar

  231. avatar Kelly Taggart says:

    2nd Amendment? We don’t need no 2nd Amendment!

  232. avatar Frank says:

    Let me be clear, I didn’t mean my guns, I only meant yours.

  233. avatar Biden Rifle says:

    That one life you save might just be your own.

  234. avatar Jarhead1982 says:

    I is going to bust a cap in that Kenyan shit fly that keeps buzzing me during my press conferences!

  235. avatar John Onderdonk Jr says:

    Mr. President’s weekly target practice with the Bill of Rights.

  236. avatar BISHOP says:

    I got your back America…TWO in your back…

  237. avatar JoshinIA says:

    Dear America,

    FOAD.

    Sincerely, Barack

  238. avatar Steve W says:

    He pulled first. It was justified.

  239. avatar DoomsdayJames says:

    Did you think I was packing Rainbows and Hugs?

  240. avatar @ScottVanEpps says:

    That’s right, I am half cracker when it comes to my pistola…

  241. avatar SelousX says:

    “Well, he was right about a kind word and a gun but the smile sure doesn’t hurt, right kids?”

  242. avatar Skeev says:

    Hi, I’m Barack Obama and welcome to Jackass.

  243. avatar Matt says:

    Hey Michelle! Bill showed me this new move, it’s called the smoking gun. Are you down?

  244. avatar Rob Drummond says:

    Ryan was standing next to Uncle Joe when BHO took a shot in their direction…………..laughing BHO said “ah shit I missed!!!”

  245. avatar John says:

    …and that’s the last thing Bin Ladin heard before I capped that mf’er in the head.

  246. avatar Evan says:

    “Hey Diane, you made sure us Big People can still have these in your bill right?”

  247. avatar Evan says:

    I’m sorry it posted so many times, when I was on the mobile version it kept telling me that the comment failed to post. I switchedd to the full version and posted it and now I see that it posted all the ones I was told failed. Trying to figure out a way to delete them now.

  248. avatar Matt says:

    Hey O Where you going with that gun in your hand
    I said Hey O Where you going with that gun in your hand
    Gonna shoot that old fat white guy,
    He’s got a Disease called Republican.

  249. avatar Carrymagnum says:

    ” I’m a little aroused”

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